Flirting

[Skyline]

I realized the DJ Bible doesn't really have anything in depth about flirting(all it really talks about is prize mentality, body language, negging, warmth, and kino) after some digging i found this:

http://m.wikihow.com/Flirt

The advice given there is pretty good to my surprise. Most of the sites i went to were generally bad advice. Would of never expected that from wikihow.

 

[zekko]

Thanks for the link, Frayzer. I'm sure some would quibble about some of the advice in that article, but it is aimed at both sexes after all. I agree that this topic is under-represented on this site. It's always irritated me that most of the advice on this forum is about creating distance between you and the female.

Not all of us are salivating lap dogs who are following girls around like puppies with our drooling tongues hanging out. But most of the advice here seems to assume that you are that kind of guy to begin with.

 

[Skyline]

Thanks for the link, Frayzer. I'm sure some would quibble about some of the advice in that article, but it is aimed at both sexes after all. I agree that this topic is under-represented on this site. It's always irritated me that most of the advice on this forum is about creating distance between you and the female.

I noticed half way in that it was aimed at both genders. But a typically SS'er can point and shoot on which is good and what isn't depending on their view. It even tells you to tread carefully with the compliments and to not always be available.

I agree with this forum distancing yourself with females. It teaches the prize mentality for the most part, and really just emphasizes on fun. It's the exact opposite of what I was expecting but I am more independent and a better person than before because of it. But alas I'm still young, and sometimes using old school weapons in your arsenal isn't such a bad thing.

Not all of us are salivating lap dogs who are following girls around like puppies with our drooling tongues hanging out. But most of the advice here seems to assume that you are that kind of guy to begin with.

Most of the threads started by people lately have been voiced in a way that seems like this. Flirting is probably not the "Don Juan" thing to do since it's not really mentioned, but who cares. If you're actually comfortable with yourself then flirting along with kino, warmth, body language, etc. is a GREAT addition to being the "perfect gentlemen."

 

[betheman]

Flirting is awesome, its such good fun and women lap it up...if done right and its congruent.
its a skill, its playfull, non threatening but charged, full of innuendo and mystery.

how do you do it? I dont know but I am very flirty as a guy, have I learned it? no, well obviously I have but god knows where. the one thing you need to know is that women are always receptive to flirting, who they are receptive to is the killer question

good topic OP,

 

[Lostboy]

Hey guys, first post! Woop!

I feel like flirting is one of those 'natural' things. I have friends who are just flirty, they don't really turn it on or off, it's their personality. Of course I'm sure you can learn it, it's just practice I guess.

I reckon though that by it's very nature it's just both people feeling confident and at ease and just having fun, no rules, and possibly with no intentions outside of that moment, you walk away and it's over, but you are smiling.

I'm generally terrible at flirting, but sometimes I can, it normally creeps up unexpectedly but great fun.

Would love to see more tips on being flirty...

 

[Skyline]

Congrats on first post Lostboy!

I agree with you two. All the times i've flirted it was sort of natural, cant really explain it. Hopefully someone will share some better insight on this!

 

[Bizzle13]

That advice is dire. Tell her how amazing/beautiful/incredible she is?! The article should be called 'How to get friendzoned'. Bud I've read some of your posts and you'd be better off writing a flirting section yourself and with others contributing it'd probably get stickied and mate even archived. As a couple have said there isn't a lot on it on SS. I agree a lot of it is natural and dependant on circumstance but there's a lot that could be covered: escalating conversation in to flirtation, playing chicken while flirting (great results), picking up on tell tale signs that women are flirting, body language etc you might be on to a winner.

 

[zekko]

Honestly, you could take most of the DJ advice around here and throw it in the trash for all the difference it makes to me. The important stuff is about self respect, and I learned that early on the hard way.

But I bet you that if I had been better at flirting all along, my success with women would have increased many times over. A very underrated skill in the community.

 

[Skyline]

Bizzle13, the advice there is okay. What it tells you what to say is where it messes up but everything else is good.

I'm gonna reanalyze my message history because i had a lot of hooks when it came to flirting. Then i'll see if i can recreate it. I'll gather all of it in one post once i get enough evidence.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

That advice is dire. Tell her how amazing/beautiful/incredible she is?! The article should be called 'How to get friendzoned'.

Seriously. Or, How to become an orbiter.

There were a few small nuggets in there but otherwise, is someone were to use that solely as a guide they'd be screwed.

I agree though, flirting doesn't get enough credit. Girls love it for one, and if you can do it properly, they'll be knocking down your door. A lot of times on here I see posters show text conversations where the girl looks like she's trying to flirt, but instead the guy takes it the wrong way and thinks she's full of herself, or ripping on him. Or they take it as her just being a b1tch...next! When all she's trying to do is strum up some witty banter....aka flirting.

Flirting is a great skill to have. The core of flirting is the way you view it. Some guys can take anything that comes out of a girls mouth and turn it into a flirt. I've seen it happen, and I've been a part of it Try seeing what happens when a girl says something to you while annoyed and angry, and you cooly respond with a flirt, a wink, and a $hit eating grin. Mush in your hands.

 

[London NATURAL]

The lack of the use of the word flirting in Game, I believe, is primarily just an example of the different terminologies used between old skool (going out on the pull an enjoying some banter) and new school (Game.)

If people were to just replace the catch all term of flirting with calibrated : negging, ****y/funny, kino, body language/eye contact, amused mastery, agree & amplify and escalate (verbally towards sexual innuendo an closing) as a few examples. You'd likely be talking about the same thing, of which much has been written.

Ultimately if you're talking to a chick'let with the right playful attitude, she probably thinks you're flirting (or trying to), an she'd in all likelihood be right.

*Random brain fart* Often when I read Game material it appears to my simple brain that it's a marketing exercise to repackage what your happy successful bachelor uncle told you many moons ago?

 

[str8-2-BONEzone]

u gotta show of ur mad skilzz thats the only way to get STR8 2 BONE ZONE in ur crib if u no what i mean

time 4 alpha wariors! if u dont have skilzz ull loose :crackup:

 

[Huffman]

I came from this article to another which is called "Be Bold" (yes in bold letters). A really really good quote from there is:

Hesitation comes from a feeling that asking for things you want is greedy, rude, and selfish. That if we truly deserve that promotion, or that date, we'll receive it.

I think this article is actually more valuable than the one on flirting.
http://m.wikihow.com/Be-Bold

 

[joshinali]

i have really agreed to your post, Thanks for sharing it