Flirting help needed...

[I-am-someone]

I'm drunk as I'm writing this message - beware.
Tonight I went out and had absolutely no female encounters. Not one. I had several opportunities, several 9's, but I didn't approach because of one reason.

I suck at flirting! I just can't seem to do it right. I keep on getting into discussions, which is a huge turnoff. I've been able to flirt properly in the past, but I seem to have lost my touch as I have become a new person mentally. I'm not necessarily happy with who I am, I've become a total male attention wh0re - teasing but not acting on it.
I've had eyecontact with about 25 girls tonight. I didn't do sh!t with it because I can only seem to get a girl turned on when I dance with her without any actual talking going on, and my back was so cramped tonight that I really couldn't dance properly. Hence, I need to learn how to flirt.

I'm willing to do absolutely anything to be able to start improving on this stuff (I'm posting here aren't I? ), but I haven't really made any progress so far - it's more like I've been getting worse at it.

Please to god, help me out guys...
I-am -frustrated tonight...

 

[Climax]

2c

1) approach more chicks

2) PRACTICE

3) flirt with urself in the mirror and see what facial expressions are good etc

4) go out more

5) Learn some C&F

Thats a start... Goodluck....


Laterz...

 

[Sanity_Cleaver]

Dont worry dude, i used to suck at flirting too.
But when it boils down to it, flirting is really just a conversation and a conversation requires people skills to keep going. I remember back when i sucked at flirting i also happened to be a nerd AFC.
But there are ways to improve.
There are certain keys to doing it:

1) Be very clear in your mind about what you want. Your words will come out with that sexual/suggestive edge to them. That is the basis of flirting

2) To do it right, you have to not actually give a rat's arse about what you are saying, and about what the other person thinks. This is basically a confidence thing, as the ultimate confidence is not giving a rats arse. This same rule applies to using humour. If you can be funny, you can flirt- simple as that (and it is wisely suggested to add humour to your flirting!) But remember, flirting is supposed to be a charming subtle thing, dont come across as too porno unless you know the girl really well.

3) Body language is very inmportant in flirting. But if you focus on the desire you feel in your mind (as in point 1) you wont need to focus on it at all, itll jsut come naturally. I maintain eye contact and use kino where i dont even realise i am.

4) Remember the basics of it- its really sexual banter. You have to pull them in a bit and then push them away with your words and keep it going. This will generate the interest and the tension, which she loves. Make sure you spend most of your time talking about her or a general topic- NEVER TALK ABOUT YOURSELF TOO MUCH!! That is that hardest thing to do, it comes far too natrually for msot guys. This dude i know only ever chats about himself when with girls. Hes 20 and has only been kissed once. Let that be a lesson.

5) Finally- the key point- PRACTICE!! Youll never be good unless you practice! If youre too afraid to do it to a chick in a nightclub, just do it to your female friends. Do it to women youre not interested in. Hell, do to your friend's mums if you have to! And if no-ones around, rehearse imaginary conversations in your head.

Thats the best way i can analyze it- hope it helps.

 

[AverageFC]

you are the most coherent drunk typer I have ever seen. Hat's off to you sir.

 

[I-am-someone]

Thanx
Took me about 30 minutes to write that message though

Thanx for the advice guys. I've been working on my social skills the last two days - just having fun basically instead of constantly thinking about this sh!t.
I've realised that, indeed, I have been progressing in the opposite direction of what you stated, Sanity_Cleaver. I kept on worrying more about the way people looked at me, I kept on focussing on different things than that which I wanted. I realize I need to change my ways into becoming more sociable. I know I can, it's just that I've been going on the wrong path for a few weeks.

To be honest, I'm going to try to let this stick because this is one important lesson.

 

[PRMoon]

There's NO excuse why you can't pick up hot girls while drinking. Drinking is like shooting up roids and playing agains pee wee football players. While drinking you're, loose, you have a false sense of confidence, and you're looking to have a good time.

These should be some of the most powerful weapons in your arsenal!! And you can dance too?! All you really have to do is just start talking to them and the booze will take you from one convo to the next... try not to say anything too stupid though, you can break a deal as easily as you got in.

 

[TDOT]

Re: 2c

Originally posted by ~ªêQµïTª$~
[
3) flirt with urself in the mirror and see what facial expressions are good etc


Laterz... [/B]

This is a brillant idea that I will definitely start doing today.