Flake situation

[Serg897]

Gentlemen,

Im in a standard situation where the girl has been flaking, I haven't reacted like the typical dude, and now she is fishing for validation.

More details:

Months ago I met this woman while dancing - got her number and called to set up a date. She flakes. I see her again sporadically at our salsa dancing place that we often go to Monday nights, and after I get favorable vibes I decide to forgive her and try again. This was admittedly breaking the rules, but I don't always follow them to the letter - she was giving me enough indication that she would be interested, so I decided to take a gamble.

This time she accepts and we have what seems like a great date to me (kiss close, lots of chemistry, etc). This was two weeks ago.

I call again last week and she doesn't return my call, I try again a few days later and leave a message with the same result - it seems this girl decided to go back to her old ways.

When I see her again last Monday, I completely ignore her. We make eye contact and say hi, but there is no attempt on my part to go talk to her. I figure she is done, and Im not going tolerate rude behavior no matter how cute she is. Admittedly I was super-pissed, but I didn't let it show. There is another woman Im seeing who has been very reliable, and Im not going to waste my time on flakes.

So, just today I get a text from her in which she apologizes.
"Im sorry for being such a colossal jerk and not returning your call"

I think its hilarious how this works, when you don't give them the attention they typically expect they come fishing for it after a few days. I would bet my left nut she is expecting me to go back with "Its okay! Can we hang out again??" - this girl is very cute and many of the men I see at this place shower her with attention. She is no doubt used to it.

Im thinking of a.) ignoring her or b.) responding with something like simple, like "okay", just to see if she comes fishing some more.

Im interested to know how others handle situations like this.

 

[Joe Stud]

say "what? when?" Like you didnt even remember that she didnt call you back

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Not for nothing I'd just ignore her. She's obviously got other 'things' -guys going on. She's just trying to hook you back in for an attention ego boost.

Her reply of: "Im sorry for being such a colossal jerk and not returning your call"

Should be replied with: "I'm not sorry, but disappointed so let's just keep it movin".

Let her figure it out and don't reply even if she does. That'll let her know you aren't wasting your time and have better things to do with your time.

It's up to her to initiate face to face next time you see her if she's really interested. Otherwise keep it movin and with that reply you've basically you've told her in a polite way to "p!ss off".

 

[TheJazz]

I agree with the Ninja. She just wants you around for an ego boost. I'd say, reply to her SMS saying "Cool. " and just leave it at that. You'd be surprised at the power of indifference. She'd soon be begging you for attention.

 

[Radharc]

She want´s to reel you back in, then you give her some attention, then it´s rinse and repeat.

It´s a cycle of attention whoring, that you can only break with some major demonstrations of value (I´m saying this because you allready had a decent date), but then again why the hell would you want to give another chance to a flake?

Or you can break it by just nexting her, which will make her want to keep reeling you in - considering you see her on a regular basis, in a hook-up prone environment. Just don´t let her phase you, and treat her like an acquaintance.