"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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First time at a club cool but...

Chosen1

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I don't see how you guys can lay game down in them. I saw a lot of beautiful women but man it was terrible. 1st the music was to loud and I don't drink so that sucked. Then there was women just sitting there with no personality at all. I asked one chick did she want to dance and she said something. I couldn't hear because again the music, but it was basically no.

Then as nice looking as I looked tonight I just don't look thuggish. There were thug looking guys, maybe I should practice looking mean like that. There was one cool chick there. I asked her what drink did they have that was none alcholic and tasted good and, she said "me". That allowed me to have some type of converstation.

Well, that about sums it up for tonight. Clubs suck to try and talk as most of you know. I'm not a quitter though so I'll find a better one and keep trying to at least talk and get some interest. Well, peace for now.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Play the Game

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Chosen1 said:
There was one cool chick there. I asked her what drink did they have that was none alcholic and tasted good and, she said "me". That allowed me to have some type of converstation.


Did she say "YOU" or was she referring to herself, the way i understood it was a diss.
 

Raikojo17

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Play the Game said:
Did she say "YOU" or was she referring to herself, the way i understood it was a diss.
dude...it sounded like she was jus tryin to flirt with him to me. come on man, not all chicks have their b1tch shield sky high.
 

Chosen1

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Raikojo17 said:
dude...it sounded like she was jus tryin to flirt with him to me. come on man, not all chicks have their b1tch shield sky high.
She was refering to herself when she said "me". I'm dense so I said what, then I got it. That was the funniest thing I heard all night. She probably was trying to flirt with me but was much older. Not bad looking at all. Not all chicks have b1itch high but some are just weird some are good looking and cold and some you just can't mess with at all.
 

Play the Game

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Raikojo17 said:
dude...it sounded like she was jus tryin to flirt with him to me. come on man, not all chicks have their b1tch shield sky high.
lol sorry, just misunderstood. It would be a great burn the other way though.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Chosen1

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Play the Game said:
lol sorry, just misunderstood. It would be a great burn the other way though.
I don't understand how it could be a burn, I would like to hear that. here's a transcript of the conversation, it's kind of funny

chosen: do you have any drinks that taste good and are non alcholic

Her: Me

chosen: WHAT

Her: Me

chosen: What

Her: Me

chosen: what type of drink is that.... Oh, laughter

Then I asked her how long she's been bartendering she said about 11 years. and she did it in Chicago. I'm 21 years old, so while she was nice I could not be any realationship with a women to old. I could only have them teach me something. Thanks for the input you guys. I'm going to dress nich and hit up another club and she what I can do.
 

KneghtRyder

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I gave up going to clubs, I think I might goto bars or only once in a while go.

Too loud, too crowded and damaging to your ears.

Plus, the clubs here are all white upper class biatches
 

Chosen1

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KneghtRyder said:
I gave up going to clubs, I think I might goto bars or only once in a while go.

Too loud, too crowded and damaging to your ears.

Plus, the clubs here are all white upper class biatches
Where are you from kneght. I'm from south bend IN, the club I went to had to many sistah's. I liked some of the experience but I would rather be in a store or something where I can actually approach and hear you talk. Well, take it easy, now I gots to get some sleep.
 

ryannath

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Dude, she was flirting with you, but she was a bartender. That is what bartenders are paid to do. They flirt with guys to get tips. I have a female friend that bartends and she says they are told to flirt to make more tips.
 

eko

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have a few drinks... then have a few more until they're all pretty.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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september_road

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that's why I go to clubs with both my guy and girl friends. The club is a hard place to get to know strangers.
 

So pimp its scary

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Wow... to the original poster, you went in there in such a terrible frame of mine that I doubt you could have got a number that night no matter how hard you tried.

1 - a coke with a lime in it is assumed to be alcoholic
2 - talk louder
3 - 'Do you wanna dance?' is a pretty rank opener (overused and is assumed as pick up attempt)
4 - Don't need to dress like a thug, dress comfortably.

The best frame of mind that I use for myself, when I go to the bar with intent to pick up, my attitude is that we're going to a party at my OTHER house... this is MY bar, I want to get to know the people at MY party. I don't TELL people it's my club, but I THINK of it as MINE.

At MY parties, I make it a point to talk to everyone there, see that people are having a good time, just laughing and goofing off with everyone. If you bring that vibe to the table... noone's even going to ask what's in your drink.

Think about it.
 

Obsidian

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Too loud, too crowded and damaging to your ears.
I pretty much always stuff small pieces of napkins (usually tan ones) in my ears for earplugs when I'm at dancing- or concert-type situations. People hardly ever notice...except this one girl who tongued them out on one occasion.


Chosen1, you oughta check out some of the info at fastseduction.com regarding clubs. It sounds like you're pretty clueless. There are a few pointers at the following link:

http://www.fastseduction.com/guide/03_Approaching/03_Clubs_and_Dancing/

There's some stuff on this site regarding clubs as well, but I'm not sure how to locate it quickly.
 

SharinganUser

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OP, I think you are in wrong state of mind when you go to a club. You went to go and talk to women. That is a rookie mistake. Ya hate to see it.

Never go to a club to pick up women, they'll "pick up"(pun intended) on that and you'll have a harder time.

You should just go to have fun. If you do that, you'll be relying less on your voice, that has to compete with 800 decibles, and your body language will be a lot better. Last time I went to a bar was just to have a few drinks and watch the sports game. A woman ended up making out with me and groping me. Did I ask her if I can get her a drink? no. Did I ask her to dance? no. I didn't really do anything. I just had fun and relaxed.

I usually just have a drink, sit back and laugh at guys that try to pick up women.
 

Raikojo17

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^so he went to pick up girls. wats wrong witht that? y not be honest with urself? would u got fishing without trying to catch fish?

i think it ok to go to pick up girls, but u should have fun and enjoy urself no matter wat happens. even if u dont get chicks, u still enjoyed urself. that's the mindset to have.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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SharinganUser

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Raikojo17 said:
^so he went to pick up girls. wats wrong witht that? y not be honest with urself? would u got fishing without trying to catch fish?

i think it ok to go to pick up girls, but u should have fun and enjoy urself no matter wat happens. even if u dont get chicks, u still enjoyed urself. that's the mindset to have.

There is nothing wrong with going out to pick up women. Just don't make it your main or only focus.

The main focus should be to have fun and enjoy yourself.

People pick up on that and they will want to be arround you. Women will think "geeze, I have all these guys buying me drinks, I wonder why that guy isn't. He's different, I'll go make sure he is having a good time."

When you go fishing do you go to relax and have a few cold ones after you cast the line? Or do you jump in the water, try swim after it and try to catch it? I don't go fishing to much, but I believe the former suggestion works a lot better.
 
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