"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

First step towards RAFC - Advice?

B

battlefield

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I've known this girl for awhile. We share the same circle of friends but we were on opposite sides of the spectrum of our group so we never really got to know each other. Sometimes we'll chat and she's always receptive and I can make her laugh. Lately she's been IMing and texting me about what she's doing, asking me if I'm going. So far I've had other plans that got in the way.

A little background on me - 19 year old virgin. Had one girlfriend in high school that I dated for about 4 months before she dumped me because I was a vag. I feel kind of awkward around girls. I never know what to say. My conversational skills are really lacking but I'm getting better. I have a problem where I get kind of weird once a girl starts showing signs of attraction. I figure I can fix this by going outside of my comfort zone by showing affection. I am good looking, 5'10, in good shape, passive personality. Halfway through the DJ Bible.

So I get this text from her on Wednesday around 8:30pm.

Her: Hey there's a social on the 16. Coming?
Me: Is it in [city]?
Her: Ya. ______ has tickets
Me: A social sounds good but I dunno for sure
Her: Well it should be good

Is there an opening here? I feel that she left the ball (am I imagining the ball?) in my court and when that happens you have to make a play, right?

I think what I should do is call her (avoid text and IM) and say: "Hey ______ it's _______. [insert opener here]" then chat her up for about 1-2 minutes before turning the conversation to the social then being like: "so I wanted to ask you if you could grab some tickets for me and [my friend]" and then from there set up something where we could meet and go together within a small group.

A few questions -
What should I do if I get her voicemail?
How long should I wait to call? She texted me on Wednesday so I'm thinking Monday or Tuesday of the following week.
Things to say/not say
Anything else...
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

G

Gamble

Don Juan
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if you're conversation skills are lacking, when and if you get her voicemail, make sure you talk in a calm, slow, and friendly tone of voice, kind of like you don't give a F*ck but you are down to have fun tone of voice. And if she picks up the phone do what you said and tell her "I wanted to know if you can grab some times for me and my friend and if you want to join us in my group." Simple. said. Done.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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