first post

[theproject]

man, there is a buttload of info to soak up here. At first it is cool because it seems like a gold mind then my brain turns to mush.

Basically, I am going to take it slow. One step at a time so I am comfortable.

My stats are 35
180lbs
unemployed
love women
self concious as fuk

All I want is the first step. Not alot of advice but just one step. I will take one and then evaluate where to go from there.

I.e. start tanning.

 

[Borgia]

Ok

Well, what u are asking for is pretty vague, but, i think the single best thing u could do would be to start working out, that and working - any work. Reason being that if u work u will be around people. If u work out at the gym u will also be around people but even if u buy free weights and just work out in your room it will make u feel better about urself and generally more positive.

Borgia

 

[WestCoaster]

Read the DJ Bible and other stuff

You've struck gold in finding this website. It really changed my attitudes towards how I approach women and life in general -- and I'm older than you.

The first step is to read the DJ Bible, which is linked above. It has a very informative step by step guide in how to become a more confident person.

I didn't read the entire DJ Bible -- some of it I didn't need and it is long -- but there are some very useful articles there.

Step two would be to read the articles section off the main page (start with "Kiss of Death" -- it's a classic) and the Hall of Fame posts. I've read most of those and they are epic.

So in order:
1. Read DJ Bible and practice some of the exercises.
2. Read articles and Hall of Fame off main page.

In addition:
Work out
Smile and say hi to others (in DJ Bible)
Take part in interesting hobbies and activities
Keep your health and mental attitude at a high level

Finding this site is the best thing you've done -- trust me!

 

[xblitz44x]

"My stats are 35
180lbs
unemployed
love women
self concious as fuk"

I see your problem already. You're concerning yourself with surface level, surperficial things. Try to embrace each and every insecurity that you have. Figure out where they came from. and know that everytime you can FEEL that insecurity creeping up on you; you're testing to yourself, and it's going to keep coming up until you face it, and fix it.

For now, realize that every girl that you look at is really just an illusion. The "hot" about her is created by you, for the sheer purpose of reflecting BACK to you those insecurities in yourself. Work on some eye contact, smiling, and seeing those illusions for just that.

-Blitz

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Working on your exterior is the easiest thing you can do but it will not be worth a d@mn if you are still an AFC. It's like buying a fancy car to pick up women, you will definitely get their attention for a while but eventually they will tire because you have nothing else to offer.

This is why many guys are confused why buying a woman gifts, dinner and other things does not promise a good relationship. Face it, literally anyone can buy stuff, that's not anything special.

I suggest putting an emphasis on rebuilding your psyche. Understand who you are at your core and what specifically you want in a woman. Gain your confidence in feeling that it's alright for you to want those specific things in a woman and you do not need to succumb to a woman's inaccurate supposed need for a 'nice guy.'

Read The DJ Bible and study the new mindset that you will need to embrace to make yourself a DJ from the inside out.

 

[Borgia]

BTW

I kind of assumed that he would read the bible and everything else in addition to working out etc. I just feel that reading in itself isn;t enough - working out will help him understand himself by giving greater clarity of mind

Borgia