Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

First post need your guys advice.

Smokebreak

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Hi everyone, I’m new here and hopefully can become successful as most of you guys in this community. I decided when I got to college I was going to start approaching girls and that it was time to take control of my life. So that’s what I did, I had a good thing going with one girl but she ended up loosing interest over the break but that’s fine. This however is different, so this was my first cold approach and it was a success I came up with an opener on the spot and talked to her for a minute made her laugh she seemed friendly and comfortable so I thought I had a good thing going. I asked for her number but she gave me her Snapchat and when I texted her I noticed she takes forever to respond so I thought she wasn’t interested. I decided to ask her on a date but me being the dumb*** I am forgot about winter break so now I’m at an issue. She said she would “love to :)” but that was a month ago, so should I still pursue it or just let this one go we barley talked over the break and I had to initiate the conversations every time. So what should I do, ask her out when I go back to college in a few days or no?
 

Stuffnu

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Welcome.
Give yourself a pat on the back. 19 and starting to cold approach. Good job.
Its fine to reach out and ask how her break went. If she‘s receptive, apply some witty banter and ask her out for a drink. If not, move on.
College is prime time so approach several girls. Once you stack up those phone numbers, if one takes awhile to respond, you’ll be too busy to care.
Keep at it.
 

KindredSpiritzz

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of course you ask her out, if she says no you're in the same spot you started. If she says yes, well then you're ahead of where you started. You always regret the chances you didnt take, seldom the ones you did take. Take your shot.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Yeah just hit her up and ask how her break was blah blah blah and tell her it would be cool to get together and connect in person.

Take it from there based on her response
 

RangerMIke

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I think you are doing fine and don't need advice you are making an effort. That's really all that matters. Just don't worry about making mistakes, just learn from them.... and know what works for one isn't going to work with another. Focus on yourself and what you want and not so much on worry about what she may or may not do, because you can't control that.

Be the best version of yourself possible, weed through the chicks that don't really like you, and move on.

The only thing I would advise is that you are worrying too much about this one girl... you should be hitting up several... and let them fight over you.... but you have to be fighting over (i.e. be the best version of yourself)
 

Black Widow Void

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Welcome aboard. Sounds to me like you're taking control and doing fine.

Before going for the kill... I'd start off with something casual to re-break the ice.
Something like
"hey, how was your holiday"
then something like
"Hey, I was thinking of heading over to ____ I thought that it would be cool if you joined me."
 

Old Balls

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Damn, 19. (Reflects back and smiles)

You're in the right place bro. Just never forget to have fun with this. And as @RangerMIke says (paraphrasing) never forget that one girl is too close to none (until you're 35 at least haha)

No pressure bud. Just be present.
 

Smokebreak

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Here’s an update: So I texted her talked and everything she said she might have covid. Had a feeling it would be a bad time to ask but I came for the date and thought an answer now would be better than later and said, “if you don’t end up getting covid you want to go on a date when we get back to college?” And asked how she was feeling she replied with just how she was feeling and no comment on the date so best to say it’s a no. It’s all good though tons of other girls in the world.
 

jimwho

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Covid is her cowardly immature response. It's the new "I have a BF" Do not reach out again. Don't even think about it.
 

Stuffnu

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Here’s an update: So I texted her talked and everything she said she might have covid. Had a feeling it would be a bad time to ask but I came for the date and thought an answer now would be better than later and said, “if you don’t end up getting covid you want to go on a date when we get back to college?” And asked how she was feeling she replied with just how she was feeling and no comment on the date so best to say it’s a no. It’s all good though tons of other girls in the world.
All good, you made an attempt.
Covid may have been a soft rejection but it doesn’t matter. “Give me a shout when you feel better” would have been the better response.. Then the ball is left in her court and you move on.
Other ladies await.. Go get ‘em!
 

2Rocky

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Work on your conversation skills both text and verbal. Learn to ask "Leading Questions " rather than interrogate them with questions.

Learn people's name at college. Greet them by name. You will be surprised how much other people respond to you knowing their name. it will help broaden your circle. Male or Female. You would also be surprised at how much more attracted women are when other people know who you are. It multiplies your attractiveness.

Don't ever think any girl is "Out of your League" Remember no matter how good she looks, some guy is tired of her crap.

Your goal right now is be LIKEABLE. And if a woman CAN'T see you are a great catch it's her problem. Remember your worth is growing every day and you have not peaked yet...
 

SW15

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@Smokebreak

1. It is good you are approaching at 19. It would have been better to start in high school at 15-16. Better later than never. How much approaching happens these days on campuses with COVID, swipe apps, and Instagram? I'm guessing more and more college men now are running copy/paste messaging game on Insta or swiping/texting on Tinder/Bumble. Approaching is better than these options.

2. Never accept a substitute for a woman's number. Her Insta or Snapchat are not good enough. Back in my day of college (early to mid 2000s), women would give AOL Instant Messanger or email addresses instead of phone numbers. Facebook and MySpace launched near the end of my time in college. Today, we see more men being anti-social, tech slaves instead of approaching strangers. My time in college was the beginning of that trend with AIM, MySpace, and early Facebook.

3. You will never have another opportunity to have such great access to single women as you do on campus. It won't happen when you're 23 and a new graduate in a bigger city. It won't happen when you're 30. Take advantage of this time. Some men use this time in their lives to lock down an LTR, which isn't the worst thing ever. If you go that route, realize that the LTR girl you lock down in college likely won't be your girlfriend at 25 or 30. Occasionally, you hear stories or meet a guy that has had a 10+ year relationship with his college sweetheart. On the surface, that sounds good. 10+ years of consistent sex with an attractive woman. It rarely works out that way. Passion subsides. The woman often gains weight. That usually happens after she pops out children, but can happen without children. Odds are that college won't be the only time in your life when you are single, but it will be a more pleasant time and better environment for mating than when you are 30, 35, or 40 and find yourself single and unattached. Make the most of your current time.

4. Take your shot on the gal you're asking about but expect nothing. Build new prospects and you will soon forget about that one if she rejects you.

Covid is her cowardly immature response. It's the new "I have a BF" Do not reach out again. Don't even think about it.
I learned something new. Covid is now giving women a free pass on excuses. I haven't heard the BF excuse in many years so I thought women were getting better at excuse making.
 
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Give her the benefit of the doubt, covid is bad right now, it's affecting my sales job atm.
 
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