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First Date Kiss

Raoul

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Should I Go for the Kiss?

That's a common question regarding how a first date should end. It's a good question as well, some people say yes as if she responds favourably you know you're not wasting your time with this girl. Others say no as they want you to up the mystery and challenge factor. ("Why didn't he kiss me like other guys usually do?")

This is how I usually do it. Whether or not I go for the kiss depends on the TYPE of date I'm on.

Here are some examples:

Ice-Skating : No kiss
Bowling : Kiss
Dancing : No kiss
Dinner : Kiss

The common theme here is if the date is heavy on kino (such as ice-skating or dancing) she will EXPECT the kiss. So when you DON'T give it, you intrigue her and make her wonder. You're different. You got her all hot and bothered, but you didn't finish the job, this time. If there is little to no kino, I kiss because I want to establish that I am a sexual being and that I am interested in her. In the former cases, with all the touching that goes on, she knows by default ; there is no need for the kiss YET.

Note that when I say kiss, I mean on the lips kiss. Pecks on the cheek are good during and for ending kino-heavy dates, but NOT after a dinner where you have not touched each other much.

Because of this rule, I structure my dates accordingly. First date is action, heavy-kino, no kiss. Second date can be action again, but can be something like dinner. The kiss is a MUST here. If you haven't kissed her by the second date, you're headed for trouble right in her supplicating-loser zone. Third date should START with a kiss. And so on and so forth.

This is my general rule for my dates. It is not a rigid system, it came about to me playing it by ear and going for the kiss whenever I felt it would be appropriate. This is the trend that emerged, and thus I feel it works best with the DJ Principles, playing up Mystery, Challenge and Control.

Hope it helps.

- Raoul

[This message has been edited by Raoul (edited 04-14-2002).]

[This message has been edited by Raoul (edited 04-14-2002).]
 

RookieDJ

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Dude, you should go for the kiss at all times after the first date! This is a benchmark. It lets you know of her interest. I think the reason you dont go for the kiss everytime is not because of where you are, but more because you arent sure whether she is totall attracted to you. As a DJ, you should know that through your convos and kino with her whether or not she is interested or not. I say go for it. That way, if she doesnt return the favor you know she isnt interested. And why would you want to spend time with a chick who isnt interested?

I prefer to do mystery and challenge in terms of calling and making dates and whatnot. That way, she knows youre interested when you kiss, but it will drive her nuts when youre not always around to go out with her.

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"If You dont Shoot...You Cant Score!"

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stonedface

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Hello everyone! I was wondering if the first date kiss is applicable to asian women (in asian countries), since they are more conservative.

Also, how do you get yourself out of the situation if she thinks you are aggressive (too fast to inititiate the kiss, etc)?

Grateful for any comments.
 

MG69

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u are right. for asian women when u go for the kiss on the first date, they will think u have only sex on your mind and they will find u too aggressive
 

Raoul

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That whole Asian Conservation excuse is nothing but that, an excuse to go back to your AFC roots. You are a man, you are a sexual being. This does not mean you grope her at every turn, but it does mean that you aren't ashamed or afraid of giving her a kiss. In fact the guideline I posted above should work exceptionally well with Asian women.

Rookie, as I said this isn't a hard and rigid system. This is what I've seen emerge as a pattern in my kissing habits. You may belong to the camp that says Yes to a kiss after the first date. This is just my spin on it. It works for me, so I'm just sharing it in case it works for someone else. As with everything else taught on this website, you do not follow everything down to the last detail. You take the general idea and adapt it to yourself.

- Raoul
 

CobraGT

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Ooh, ooh, I have something to add Raoul. You might slip in a few questions about her food likes and dislikes. I recently heard a story from a friend about a date she had. She for some odd reason hates beef and pork. Her date started off the dinner date bad by ordering for her. Guess what he ordered: beef and pork enchiladas. She decided not to eat after that. Then after the dinner he kissed her and she said she almost threw up on the spot given he had just ate beef and pork. This is a odd turn of events I realize, but it shows that you might want to contemplate that first kiss after dinner. Who knows you might end up with one of those vegetarians. Of course I don't think I could handle a woman with dislikes like meat, so the fact that she might never want to kiss me again might be for the best. Just something to ponder.

CobraGT

[This message has been edited by CobraGT (edited 04-21-2002).]
 

Aiken_Drum

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I believe you should kiss on every date you had a good rapport, as long as you have a clean mouth.
Neither you not her would like to be kissed if the other person ate tacos or garlic soup, etc.

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"In doing good, avoid notoriety; in doing evil, avoid self-awareness" Duncan Idaho, Mentat (Dune).

"I can imagine a perfect world, a world without hate, a world without war. Then I can imagine us attacking that world
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