"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Finding that happy medium

Crissco

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I notice at times I tend to over do it. Ex. If I say something to a girl I tend to come off as a **** sometimes. I dont intentionally mean it, it just comes off that way then she puts a guard up and doesn't like me for the rest of the night. I know you should never buy a girl a drink, but what if youve known her for a while and she buys the first round then you buy the second and so on. It seems the more I read(not everything) the worse certain things become. How can I find that happy medium without becoming a ****.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

kingsam

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Crissco said:
I notice at times I tend to over do it. Ex. If I say something to a girl I tend to come off as a **** sometimes.A I dont intentionally mean it, it just comes off that way then she puts a guard up and doesn't like me for the rest of the night.B I know you should never buy a girl a drink, but what if youve known her for a while and she buys the first round then you buy the second and so on. It seems the more I read(not everything) the worse certain things become. How can I find that happy medium without becoming a ****.
A- need to give some examples to you give you insights as there are possible reasons- you may not be saying it in the right "way", you may be misreading their interest/comfort, or you need more rapport first, body language may be off, may just be a non receptive girl (which means your situational awareness/reading needs improving)...
Also for example saying C+F lines NOT in a C+F way can come across as wired/bad/creepy...etc...

B-the not buying a drink refers more to the fact that a majoirty of guys seem to think that if they buy a girl a drink they are somehow more "in"...when we all know thats far from reality, making you more of a chode- its like trying to BUY their interest level.
Girls are soo used to having drinks bought for them that you stand out if you DONT do it...
- i know a guy who is socaially very alpha (every one worships him!) but he thinks buying drinks gets you "in" with a girl...poor!
...i know frinds who spend loads of $£ on chicks drinks and get nowhere!

there are always exceptions to rules, and you will have to judge when its acceptable to get drinks... your example is likely ok to buy drinks (its kinda rude not to get a 2nd round if she got the 1st round!)
another time when its ok to get a drink is when you are with a chick - like in a club, and shes definately going home with you...etc... (but again its not going to increase IL)

hope this helps a little!
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thinking about guys who "think they are IN if they buy a drink", i have a guy friend who thinks he is IN just b'coz he is talking to the girl...pathetic!


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Crissco said:
It seems the more I read(not everything) the worse certain things become. How can I find that happy medium without becoming a ****.
please claify what you mean - do you mean reading too much theory without teh practice/experience to fully grasp it?
remember take this in small steps!
 

Crissco

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Example - Last night I went to an outdoor bar with my friend, he saw some people he knew, I introduced my self...I was talking to one of this kids girlfriends and I was ragging on her a bit, I guess I took it over the edge, and she gave me a playful slap that was pretty hard. Even though she was hammer, it got me a bit pissed, I told her to never do that again, I dont remember what she said but she sorta blew it off. She was a straight up *****, even her boyfriend said so, but I took it the ragging a bit to bar, more of an insult.
What I do find funny is I was talking to this 8 and we were getting along great. I always get a lot great with the hot ones.(I can charm the hot ones but im a jerk to the ugly/*****y ones, usually, sometimes im just a jerk) (Im pretty good looking my self, guess that helps) Its always the immature or heavier ones I have problems with, maybe because I have the maturity and they don't. You are probably right on the I was probably not saying it the "right" way.

About the reading to much part...Yea I tend to read to much, and its too much info at once, and a lot of it is conflicting at times. The tip/article page is awesome, put a lot of stuff in perspective when I first started. I was always a natural at talking to women, older women mind you. Good listener know when to be playful...But when I started to read to much I guess it overloaded my brain with all that info and not knowing what to take as fact and as fiction.

With the drink part, thats an example of what I was just talking about. Its common courtesy to buy someone a drink if you guys are going rounds... I took it as never buy a girl a drink...See what I mean.

Appreciate the help bro.


kingsam said:
A- need to give some examples to you give you insights as there are possible reasons- you may not be saying it in the right "way", you may be misreading their interest/comfort, or you need more rapport first, body language may be off, may just be a non receptive girl (which means your situational awareness/reading needs improving)...
Also for example saying C+F lines NOT in a C+F way can come across as wired/bad/creepy...etc...

B-the not buying a drink refers more to the fact that a majoirty of guys seem to think that if they buy a girl a drink they are somehow more "in"...when we all know thats far from reality, making you more of a chode- its like trying to BUY their interest level.
Girls are soo used to having drinks bought for them that you stand out if you DONT do it...
- i know a guy who is socaially very alpha (every one worships him!) but he thinks buying drinks gets you "in" with a girl...poor!
...i know frinds who spend loads of $£ on chicks drinks and get nowhere!

there are always exceptions to rules, and you will have to judge when its acceptable to get drinks... your example is likely ok to buy drinks (its kinda rude not to get a 2nd round if she got the 1st round!)
another time when its ok to get a drink is when you are with a chick - like in a club, and shes definately going home with you...etc... (but again its not going to increase IL)

hope this helps a little!
-----

thinking about guys who "think they are IN if they buy a drink", i have a guy friend who thinks he is IN just b'coz he is talking to the girl...pathetic!


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please claify what you mean - do you mean reading too much theory without teh practice/experience to fully grasp it?
remember take this in small steps!
 
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