Finally ready to give her another try

[Dam44]

This thread was the first I ever made on this forum, it's also why I registered.

So I've worked on some of the advices I got from the thread.

I treated her like just any friend, maybe a little stranger some times. I no longer go to talk to her in class anymore. I only speak to her if we cross paths or if she comes to me.

On the average, I speak to her once a week or twice in 2 weeks. I no longer throw my attention carelessly.

Also, at the same time I talk to different girls and guys in my class and have fun.

We never spoke of her rejecting me( saying she was in a 'relationship'), we act like it never happened.

When I meet her, I most times go in for a hug rather than a very platonic hello or handshake. Well, she's always excited when she sees me and gives me a compliment most times. Sometimes she calls my name out in long playful voices.

There was a particular time when she even told me something has changed about me, and that I'm not as nice as before.

I've caught her staring at me multiple times when I'm talking to other girls or when they talk to me. I act like I don't notice.

Some people also suggested starving her of electronic attention. I have not texted her on WhatsApp for the past 56 days. The last time we talked, she sent a message first.

Yesterday I caught her staring at me at a school event, I was sitting some seats in front of her. I decide to go talk to her after the event. When I asked how she was doing, she said she was where I left here and started talking about how I forgot her without even checking up on her. I do a smile/chuckle and change the topic of discussion.
When I told her I was leaving, she pleaded with me to walk with her a bit more

Right now, I'm quite confused. I don't know if I should go for her again(in a few weeks when exams would be over). But I enjoy having some sort of power that I currently do and I don't want to lose it if she rejects me again

PS: Also, she saw me on a date with a girl some weeks back, she came to get something at the restaurant,lol. I ignored her BTW

Although, I'm talking to other girls currently, I still feel some sort of attraction for her, I've tried so hard but that tiny bit of it is still present.

So what's your opinion on this? Sorry, it was a long one

 

[Bingo-Player]

i can already tell from the way you are over analysing every tiny detail your game just isn't good enough

players do not worry about stuff like this , that is for her to be worrying about not you

get yourself together approach and say do you want too date anything other than a yes and you can get on with your life

When I meet her, I most times go in for a hug rather than a very platonic hello or handshake. Well, she's always excited when she sees me and gives me a compliment most times. Sometimes she calls my name out in long playful voices.

There was a particular time when she even told me something has changed about me, and that I'm not as nice as before.

I've caught her staring at me multiple times when I'm talking to other girls or when they talk to me. I act like I don't notice.

Some people also suggested starving her of electronic attention. I have not texted her on WhatsApp for the past 56 days. The last time we talked, she sent a message first.

Yesterday I caught her staring at me at a school event, I was sitting some seats in front of her. I decide to go talk to her after the event. When I asked how she was doing, she said she was where I left here and started talking about how I forgot her without even checking up on her. I do a smile/chuckle and change the topic of discussion.
When I told her I was leaving, she pleaded with me to walk with her a bit more

Right now, I'm quite confused. I don't know if I should go for her again(in a few weeks when exams would be over). But I enjoy having some sort of power that I currently do and I don't want to lose it if she rejects me again

 

[TheProspect]

You're overthinking this.

You haven't even kissed this girl nor been on a date with her, so just invite her out on one. You'll find out quickly where she stands, but you need to make a move already instead of overanalyzing trivial interactions.

I don't know if I should go for her again(in a few weeks when exams would be over). But I enjoy having some sort of power that I currently do and I don't want to lose it if she rejects me again

You don't have any power. You are just protecting yourself from experiencing rejection.

Confidence is knowing you'll be okay regardless of the outcome. Sometimes you need to build competence (a requirement of confidence in order to separate it from delusion) through experience and repetition. Build that experience by asking her out. I know it's uncomfortable at first, but you need to push past that hesitation. Waiting until exams are over also seems like you just delaying putting yourself in a position to be rejected.

Stop overthinking and take action. Ask her out, but continue talking to & dating other women regardless of how your onenitus responds.

 

[Dam44]

i can already tell from the way you are over analysing every tiny detail your game just isn't good enough

players do not worry about stuff like this , that is for her to be worrying about not you

get yourself together approach and say do you want too date anything other than a yes and you can get on with your life

Maybe I'm over analysing a bit but I was trying to provide enough details.

Also I don't want to be a player, I just want to be good with women.

Do you mean asking her out on a date or just a direct question

 

[Dam44]

You're overthinking this.

You haven't even kissed this girl nor been on a date with her, so just invite her out on one. You'll find out quickly where she stands, but you need to make a move already instead of overanalyzing trivial interactions.



You don't have any power. You are just protecting yourself from experiencing rejection.

Confidence is knowing you'll be okay regardless of the outcome. Sometimes you need to build competence (a requirement of confidence in order to separate it from delusion) through experience and repetition. Build that experience by asking her out. I know it's uncomfortable at first, but you need to push past that hesitation. Waiting until exams are over also seems like you just delaying putting yourself in a position to be rejected.

Stop overthinking and take action. Ask her out, but continue talking to & dating other women regardless of how your onenitus responds.

Thank you. I'll do this