Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Field Report: Salsa lesson, open mic night, no approaches

MOTU

Master Don Juan
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Ok dudes this is long and doesn't reach much of a climax so be warned!

Last night I couldn't decide between taking a salsa lesson at latin night at a wine bar and doing an acoustic open mic night at a cool little club. I decided to do both. I actually went out and bought a new outfit and got a haircut so I would look my best.

8:15pm salsa dancing: this is a small place, cool vibe, offers a free salsa lesson before the band plays. Several tables of groups of chicks, some a LOT younger than me and some older. I was the only single guy in the place as far as I could tell. I initially sat at the only open seat at the bar, but it was crowded and the view of the room was lousy, so I moved to a 4 top table close to the dance floor.

When they called for the dance lesson initially only this young fat white girl got up, then I jumped up and headed for the dance floor.. I can tell you I was a little nervous. Soon a couple joined us and the instructor started showing the basic steps, and others joined on the dance floor until there was about 16 people out there, like 10 girls and 6 dudes. As we learned we rotated partners and I got to dance with some smoking hot chicks. Made good small talk them, did the bratty little sister thing. The partner I had the longest was fvcking sexy, her hands palms sweating and she was giving me some IOI, but she was there with a guy. This 50+ white woman was drunk and was practically feeling me up. She was too drunk to keep time so I told her fvck it let's two step and we did and got a few laughs out of it. I had practiced off of youtube a little so I did ok on the dance floor.

After the lesson when the band started the young fat girl came over and asked me to dance, so I obliged. I noticed some older women noticing me, but none that interested me. Time to split.

9:45 head to open mic. I sign up late so I am late in the set. I chat with this 22yo at the bar who looks like she has some bad habits. There is only one woman there who even mildly interests me. I wait my turn making small talk with other patrons and enjoying the music. I play my set around midnight. I decide to chat up the one decent woman but she's gone, so I finish my beer and head home.

End result: two badd@ss activities, no numbers. I think if I can really learn to Salsa it will be fun and loads of chicks. I wasn't too disappointed at open mic because I love to sing and play. I should have approached the decent chick before my set and not waited.

Regardless, I had a fun evening.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Huffman

Master Don Juan
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Yeah, still sucks if the venue didn't have enough promising targets... It's like going to a house party where every girl is their with their boyfriend, hubby, etc. You arrive super pumped, dressed to kill, no targets. Damn.

Hope you had fun nonetheless.
 

MOTU

Master Don Juan
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Thanks, I did have fun. And it cemented my resolve to learn to dance... several of the (few) women there (with other dudes) were exactly to my taste. I dig them latinas!
 
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