Field Report: approach in the street, got me a date

[Veridin]

This Wednesday, I was walking around in the middle of the day taking pictures of the first snow. Toward the end I was taking a picture of the icicles on an old building to the right of a walking path, when a girl passed by and took a picture of the field to the left of the path, stopping a few steps ahead of me. I wasn't going in that direction, but I changed my mind: I hurried up to her to walk beside her, and said "It's beautiful, isn't it?"

It turned out she is a student at the nearby college, and we talked for a while. I showed her the picture I had just taken, and so on. I brought up Christmas presents and said I wanted to go find a present at a Christmas market this weekend. I suggested she go with me, and she said okay.

Then I suggested we go by train to a bigger nearby city this coming Saturday, and go to the much bigger Christmas market there. She was reluctant for a moment, but then agreed.

Note: I did not ask her to go to the bigger market first, because it would have been too much. It was big enough for her to agree to go to a market in the same town. But once she had agreed to that, I could bring up the train ride.

I really got the perfect opener for a conversation here, taking a picture, and a girl takes a picture just a few steps from me at the same time. Gave me something to talk about. It does pay to approach girls out of the blue, but you need to be a little smart about it; it must seem like you have a reason. Like you are not just talking to her because she looks good and you are horny. I wouldn't just go up to a girl passing by in the street and say, "Hey there, sexy!"

I have talked to some other girls recently, and it didn't pan out. But that is to be expected. Like looking for a job or an apartment, you miss a lot more than you hit.


Macro preparations to facilitate my micro game:

--Looking sharp at all times, just in case
--Getting work out of the way in the evenings, so I can be outdoors in the middle of the day
--Doing various things outside normal routine: going to an amateur concert, visiting the city library, going to a Christmas market, taking pictures of snowy buildings - almost anything out of the ordinary is good, if the ordinary isn't doing anything for you
--Walking in the areas where I am more likely to meet girls my age

When you keep things like this in mind every day, your opportunities increase.

 

[Veridin]

I forgot: today this girl sent me a text message, asking if a friend of hers can come with us on Saturday.

What do you answer when a girl wants to bring a friend along to a date? Do you agree, and try to make the best of the situation? Or do you refuse, and risk the date?

I thought about what to say for half an hour, and realized that I just couldn't have someone else along for our first date. Not a chance - it would be better to call it off entirely. The friend would make things ten times harder, and there would be a great risk that I would end up in the friend category myself.

She was probably just nervous, since we had only talked to each other for twenty minutes when we met, and so I decided to call her instead of texting her, so she could hear my voice again.

I called and I was joking about it, saying I didn't know if the two of them were planning to rob me, and that I would feel a bit lonely. I said, "How can I flirt shamelessly with you if your friend is there to protect you?"

I also suggested that we go do something together with her friend on Sunday instead, after having been to the market just the two of us on Saturday. Or we could go bowling next week.

It worked, she took it well and agreed that we go alone. She even said that she understood that it might feel bad for me. What girl worth her salt would not understand a guy who refuses to let her bring along a friend at a date? Such a girl is not someone you want to go out with anyway.

 

[mustfirstregister]

I suggest you take a friend with you. Ask your friend to entertain her friend while you PUA her.

 

[Veridin]

I suggest you take a friend with you. Ask your friend to entertain her friend while you PUA her.

No MFR, like I write above, I called her and said no to that. Which she accepted. I think it is meaningless to go on a date if the girl brings a friend. At least the first times, before you have even had a chance to build a relation between yourself and her.

 

[cat psychology]

Her wanting to bring her friend shows she has low interest¬¬

 

[Special T]

Her wanting to bring her friend shows she has low interest¬¬

Most likely she doesn't feel comfortable going out alone with him. It doesn't necessarily mean low interest.