"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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FIELD REPORT #4: Warning sign?

Marlimus

Senior Don Juan
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This experience threw me off.

I spy a chick in the college cafeteria. I grab a coffe and sit down across her. Totally relaxed.

Me: What are you reading?
Her: ______ for my biology major.
Me: A science major I presume?
Her: No, psych, actually.
Me: My name is ______ what's yours?
Her: ______.

Me: Listen, _____ lets grab a cup of coffee sometime.
Her: Uh, no thanks.
Me: No problem. See you later.

I get up to leave
Her: It was nice meeting you!
Me: Yeah, right!
Her: No, seriously, you came right up to me. Just like you came right up to us last week.
Me: When was that?
Her: Just last week.
Me: And your friend's name was?
Her: Katie?
Me: (Shaking my head) Iknow too many people by that name. Later.

I walk away at first, but my curiousity overcomes me. I go back.
Me; Is that a good thing or a bad thing? What did you mean by that comment?
Her: I don't know what you're talking about. I have to study.
----------End of interaction-------------------

This has happened before. I bump into the same girls over and over without remembering them, and her comment disturbed me. I don't want to look like a shark who can't even remember half the chicks he's met (even if its the truth)
I need to work on my memory, because this has happened before. I met a girl at a party and passed her straight the next day because I forgot her. Now she thinks I'm an ******* or that I think she's not important. On such a small college campus, I need to make sure I don't get a bad rep.

Damn, this college campus is way too small.

I think my next set of field reports will focus on dates. Lord knows I have enough phone numbers. I need to switch from hunting to farming.

Marlimus out.
NorPacWolf, I would welcome your comments. Shezzler too.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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NorPacWolf

Senior Don Juan
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THERE'S STILL A LONG WAY TO GO

"This experience threw me off.

I spy a chick in the college cafeteria. I grab a coffe and sit down across her. Totally relaxed.

Me: What are you reading?
Her: ______ for my biology major.
Me: A science major I presume?
Her: No, psych, actually.
Me: My name is ______ what's yours?
Her: ______.

Me: Listen, _____ lets grab a cup of coffee sometime.
Her: Uh, no thanks."

---I have to repeat my suggestions from my previous post. You're definitely trying to close too fast. That's why you can't remember these girl's faces. Take some time to learn something about your target. Ask questions as a way of qualifying her. Also, find some way to kino her. A handshake during an initial introduction is fine. In addition, look for buying signals and IOI's during the interaction: does she stare intently? Does she kino you back, or better yet, initiate kino? Does she ask you what your name is? Does she hit you or squeeze your hand while you shake hands? Is she giggling like a giddy schoolgirl? Do her cheeks flush red? If so, keep escalating the kino. Also, only suggest a future meeting AFTER you get at least one, or better yet, several of these IOI's.

My recommendation is that you pick up a copy of The Game by Neil Strauss. Pickup is a game of tremendous sophistication nowadays and to be honest, DJ Bootcamp is no longer a 'state of the art' document. DJBC is still very, very useful in helping individuals get over their fear of the approach, but it's not terribly useful in developing a bridge between your approach/opener and the close.

Keep reading, keep up the field work, and keep posting FR's. We're rooting for you.

NorPacWolf
 

So pimp its scary

Master Don Juan
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Man, that's good that you approached...but you didn't deal with the issue fully, and should have been done instantly.

Try to keep better track of the chicks you hit on.

You are definately going for too quick of a close for what your asking for.

Me: What are you reading?
Her: ______ for my biology major.
Me: A science major I presume?
Her: No, psych, actually.
Here's where I step in, it's good to here.

ME : oh... do you plan to open your own practise
her : *eventually leading to* I'm studying right now
me: ok, when are you finished studying?
Her: an hour
me : ok, I'll be at __ coffee shop at __, meet me there so we can finish this conversation.
her :eek:k
----------

Now that doesn't solve your issue of hitting on this girl last week... she probly shot you down last week too... or you were too busy hitting on her friend last time.
 

biker_gixxer

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I walk away at first, but my curiousity overcomes me. I go back

I would of kept walking bro, you seem clingy if you go back.

I agree with 'So Pimp', you are closing way to fast. Take a few minutes to chat, get some chemistry going, try to build some attraction, flirt a little. Once you guys are vibing and you can feel that she's interested, that is when you get up to leave, but not before getting her number or setting up a coffee date.

Nice job on the approach by the way...
 

SevenOne9

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To the OP -- you lacked rapport. That was your main and biggest problem.

They key is too strike up 'feelings' within her.

You went in too fast; its like you were in a hurry. Try to 'branch' the convo next time.

Nothing came out of it because she didn't strike you as interesting enough to hold her attention.

Let me also add, she's the one who's supposed to be curious about YOU, not the other way around...

Now, if you were just doing this as a bootcamp practice-- i'd understand.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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