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Fiancée dreamt I cheated on her

MindPurify

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So my fiancée was feeling pretty flat this morning after waking up, and I found out she dreamt I cheated on her with my ex!!
Obviously I told her "It's just a dream". But she was clearly feeling very flat and down.
I was sitting on another couch and told her to come over and give me a hug (note I didn't go to her). She came over, sat on my lap, hugged. I looked her in the eyes and said, "The only girl I'm seeing is you. Sometimes dreams feel oh so real that we need to be told the reality and that it really was just a dream." She nodded, we kissed lots. Hugged.
Aaaand then I stressed her out with our wedding rehearsal date lol!

Now... is what I said to her too beta??? Or was it what any fiance should do to cheer their partner up and turn a frown upside down?
I'm a huuuuge advocate for monogamy and cheating is never an option. That's just me.
 

Tilex

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Dreams are just manifestations of the subconscious mind.
Someone must've cheated on her in the past or she might've felt jealous one time about someone you were talking to.
Either way you did good, although that did seem like a genuine sh!t test.
 

Serenity

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So my fiancée was feeling pretty flat this morning after waking up, and I found out she dreamt I cheated on her with my ex!!
Obviously I told her "It's just a dream". But she was clearly feeling very flat and down.
I was sitting on another couch and told her to come over and give me a hug (note I didn't go to her). She came over, sat on my lap, hugged. I looked her in the eyes and said, "The only girl I'm seeing is you. Sometimes dreams feel oh so real that we need to be told the reality and that it really was just a dream." She nodded, we kissed lots. Hugged.
Aaaand then I stressed her out with our wedding rehearsal date lol!

Now... is what I said to her too beta??? Or was it what any fiance should do to cheer their partner up and turn a frown upside down?
I'm a huuuuge advocate for monogamy and cheating is never an option. That's just me.
I'd say you handled that appropriately.

I have a friend who experienced the exact same thing, his girlfriend had a very realistic dream where he snuck out of bed and went off to cheat. In reality he had been laying next to her the whole night, but she got really messed up by that dream. He spent a good amount of time calming her down enough to see it for what it was, just a bad dream.

I've had some dreams of that nature, not about cheating, but realistic feeling and very convincing. Then wake up with my emotions all messed up, you can't just turn it off and it takes some time to come back down to reality. Worst was I dreamt that I woke up in my bed, my brother was laying there next to me, I open my eyes then he suddenly takes a knife and tries stabbing me. I then wake up in shock from that nightmare thinking it's reality now, turn around, see my brother and he tries stabbing me with a knife. This happens a third time before I wake up for real, by that point I'm scared out of my mind, almost genuinely traumatized. I barely have the courage to look to my right side (I always sleep on the left side), I'm slightly relieved that there's nobody there. Still I was in serious doubt for a few hours whether I was really awake, I was paranoid he'd turn up with a knife somewhere. Just to mention it, he's a good brother so this dream was irrational on every level, but still. It fvcked me up for a few hours before I trusted my senses again.

I think it's sad that so many guys think being considerate and comforting is being a beta. That they don't do what's right because they fear being seen as beta. You didn't fall for that, but you don't seem to fully get what a beta really is. It's not how you respond that would make it beta, it's what you respond to. A beta responds inappropriately. To clarify, inappropriately would be to comfort and please if the girl is stepping over boundaries, making unreasonable demands or otherwise take unfair advantage of you. Your girl just had a sh!tty dream that felt too real and shook her emotions, you care about her and want to relieve her of that bad feeling, so you responded appropriately.

Dreams are just manifestations of the subconscious mind.
Someone must've cheated on her in the past or she might've felt jealous one time about someone you were talking to.
Either way you did good, although that did seem like a genuine sh!t test.
First sentence is correct.
Second sentence isn't. While this may (not must) be the case, it isn't necessarily so. She may simply care a great deal about him and fear losing him, as was the case for my friend in the story above. A dream like that may be a complete fabrication of the mind, as was the case in the story above about my brother killing me in my dream inception style. It makes no rational sense because there is none, I have no past memory or experience that would explain that dream. The mind can sometimes jumble random things together in dreams, our emotions may be awake, but our sense of rationality may still be offline, leading to some fvcking bizarre dreams with a huge emotional impact.
Third sentence I disagree with the sh!t test part of it, this stuff can happen, although it's rare. Besides, it's a bit late for sh!t testing when you're engaged already...
 

backseatjuan

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You're the aussie guy who read the rationale male and come here for advice, you have a girl who you marrying, I remember you by your superman avatar.

The problem here is you asking all the wrong questions. It's not what she dreamed about, and you handled it properly or not, it's about her fcking your brains already, and your frame in that relationship. This is a sign of things to come your way, bad things. Unfortunately, there is nothing anyone of us here, can tell you not go through with it. You will continue be asking questions about this one and only girl you're marrying, and after you marry, you will continue coming here asking how to handle things with her, and those things will progressively get worst. Don't get me wrong, you're not wasting anyone's time here, it's your own time you're about to waste, years gone from your life. Age 31 is a good age to get married, though not to settle, that's what you do. The stuff you do is reserved for old men, when there is nothing else left, as a last resort, either this or bullet to the head.

She's not the only girl that asked this kind of sht. My past girlfriend had similar question, and the one before her had similar question as well.

Deep down inside she knows you are not the man she dreamed of as a little girl, and she knows she is making a marriage arrangement with a beta male, she has her doubts about you, and she knows this marriage is set for failure.

The only thing I can think of that might work, is this thread
Be honest with yourself, where is she at with her interest level to you? Look carefully at 70% zone.
 
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MindPurify

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You're the aussie guy who read the rationale male and come here for advice, you have a girl who you marrying, I remember you by your superman avatar.

The problem here is you asking all the wrong questions. It's not what she dreamed about, and you handled it properly or not, it's about her fcking your brains already, and your frame in that relationship. This is a sign of things to come your way, bad things. Unfortunately, there is nothing anyone of us here, can tell you not go through with it. You will continue be asking questions about this one and only girl you're marrying, and after you marry, you will continue coming here asking how to handle things with her, and those things will progressively get worst. Don't get me wrong, you're not wasting anyone's time here, it's your own time you're about to waste, years gone from your life. Age 31 is a good age to get married, though not to settle, that's what you do. The stuff you do is reserved for old men, when there is nothing else left, as a last resort, either this or bullet to the head.

She's not the only girl that asked this kind of sht. My past girlfriend had similar question, and the one before her had similar question as well.

Deep down inside she knows you are not the man she dreamed of as a little girl, and she knows she is making a marriage arrangement with a beta male, she has her doubts about you, and she knows this marriage is set for failure.

The only thing I can think of that might work, is this thread
Be honest with yourself, where is she at with her interest level to you? Look carefully at 70% zone.
Pessismist indeed. I don't appreciate being told it's all a failure and it will get worse.
She asked me to strip for her a couple of days ago and spank her and asking me for showers with her. The interest level is fine and dandy!

Girls have off mornings/days and I merely want to improve in my responses and reactions to my fiancée's issues.
 
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