Fell Off The Bootcamp Bandwagon--how To Get Back On

[allan976]

I am in a pickle right now. To give a brief background, I went through DJ Bootcamp starting back in mid march and essentially made it through seven weeks of bootcamp. I realized fantastic gains in confidence and assertiveness in my professional as well as personal life. However, I stopped cold approaches altogether when I began a full time job beginning in mid June.

Here's my dllemma: I know bootcamp works but I am extremely frustrated that I essentially have to start at square one/week one again, even though I've gone through seven weeks of BC very recently. My conversational skills have evaporated as has a good deal of my confidence.

To put it a different way, the linear bootcamp program is very well designed, but I feel it prevents me from cold approaching for the first two weeks or so as I develop a foundation of conversational skills.

Has anyone actually gone through multiple bootcamps? If so, how did you deal with the frustration of starting from scratch?

 

[BrotherAP]

Why don't you join with us, we're on week 4 - a perfect time to jump in and get some phone numbers

 

[allan976]

First Lesson Learned

Brother,

Props to you for keeping the mojo going through week 4. I am going to start from scratch myself. Just after posting, I realized that a large part of the reason why bootcamp is so difficult to continue and why it's so easy to fall off, is because there's so little social validation for what we are doing. We are rewarded for working hard, following the rules, in other words, for fitting into the social system. However, we are forbidden from talking explicitly about our sexual desires and are called perverts, players, shallow, whatever, by simply acknowledging that we are men and have desires that we need to pursue if we are to be happy. In other words, we have to operate furtively, in hiding. We should be able to talk openly with each other about our games, both at work and in relationships; women do this ALL the time and it's easy to understand why they have a decided advantage and have us men whipped from such an early age.

Lesson learned 1: feel free to express your frustrations and ask for help on this board or from your brothers in real life. But ONLY after you've read the DJ Bible, hehe.

 

[BrotherAP]

Getting social approval doesn't have to be too hard. Just make some friends who are completely unable to approach girls, then take them places and approach girls. They'll think that you're the coolest guy in the world. I have a friend who once told me, and I quote, "You never cease to amaze me."

As far as the general public goes, don't worry about their approval. You don't get anywhere in this world by doing what everyone else is doing - look at any greatly successful person and you'll find a disregard for social norms and often contempt for authority.

 

[allan976]

I just read through the materials for week one. Amazing stuff. What really shocks me is how quickly I can forget the themes which I found so powerful and compelling just weeks ago. You really need to anchor these materials with solid field work and keep at it continuously or your momentum disappears.

Lesson learned: don't stop.