Feeling self conscious about a mistake pointed out to me...

[FM 3321]

I was talking to a good female friend last night and we were talking about a relationship I had with another girl that ended, more like fizzled out as I thought, a while back.

It was around the end of October when me and this girl that I was dating last got physical and I'm feeling a little self concious because I believed I screwed up that night I was with her. I didn't really think about it until my female friend and I were discussing it.


Anyway, that night we were getting physical things were going great. We were watching a movie, then started kissing and things progressed until I ate her out and she loved it. Then we proceeded to the bed and made out even more and I made two AFC moves which I was kicking myself for which I asked, "did you come before I did that thing?"...she nodded and we kept kissing. Then things were heating up in the bed even more and I told her "I have a condom in the bag I brought if you want to go ahead with sex".....she looked at me while kissing and said "next time".

Now this girl is 20 and I'm 24 and honestly the first "relationship" I've had thanks to what I've learned from the seduction community and I was just feeling bad about that today since my female friend pointed out that what I did was a bad move with the girl.

Last time I saw this girl was when I set up a date last week after not seeing her for a while because I was trying to get her back. I mentally prepared myself for out dinner date and made sure that I acted like nothing happened between us, flirted, stood my ground to her tests, acted ****y funny and initiated Kino. Nothing happened but I could tell she was comfortable around me. Well I called her for new years and the next day when she said she'll call me back and she didn't.

So I've decided not to call her from now on and I'm just wondering whether or not I could be seen as a "jerk" for not being more sensitive about sex when we do see each other again....she's my sisters friend so I know I will....or still go on acting like I never did anything wrong.

During our date I could tell she was testing my by saying "all guys are dumb"....which I responded with a smirk "you know, men are smarter then women."...and got her to laugh about stuff again. Plus she told me that she's been dealing with drama in her life and I didn't go into that subject acting like I had nothing to do with drama in her life. I could tell she was attempting at certian times to push conversation to somthing serious but I never let it get that way and therefore, were no awkward moments that night which was great............hell I don't know why I'm stressing over this but I always got the feeling that I needed to be more "sensitive" with this girl since I did care for her.

Maybe I'm letting our feminist media and my feminist female friend get to me about issues with women but I need to get a MANs opinion about this. I just want to get rid of this feeling. It's funny how women can mess with your mind if you let them.

 

[Climax]

interesting...

Dude... u did fine... looks to me that you dont have the problem of "pleasuring" a chick, nor do you have a problem being in the company of a woman and having full control... So u pulled those 2 AFC moves which resulted in not having sex/making love to her on that night.... big deal... at least u can learn from your mistakes and not repeat them! Take this as a lesson rather than a F*ckup.

Now I'm guessing that this girl is really sensative seeing as she responded the way she did when u asked her about the condom.... but then maybe she felt like you were putting her on the spot by asking her that... so nect time just do and dont ask, and if she sais no or wateva, THEN u know that u musnt, but unless she DOES say no or pushes u away, u need to be in control of the situation and make ur own decisions.

Now about her not returning your calls, well she is probably confused between being pissed off about that, and liking yu so much, so she doesnt know what to do... so i would say that after giving her a day or 2, to phone her again if she doesnt respond, and if she doesnt pick up or return ur calls, then either u decide there and there to NEXT her, or u could take the extra step and go see her in person and sort **** out, make plans with her, and make her YOURS, without making the same mistakes as u did the 1st time

U need to remember this... a woman is a very delicate and sensative thing, so u DO need to sometimes be carefull with them and handle them "gently"

Well.. goodluck to you and i look forward to hearing the continuation of this story

Laterz...

 

[FM 3321]

Well I was advised to quit calling her all together since I did call her a couple days ago while she was watching a game. I told her to call me back and she didn't. I plan to just leave her alone until she wants to contact me again.

I was just feeling bad since I've had the feeling I wasn't sensitive enough to her but interesting thing is that ever since I knew this girl I've treated her the same. My sister has known her for about 5 or 6 years, she was hot but didn't pay much attention to her until the past couple of years. I didn't even think of her romantically until last summer.

Thanks for your input. I think I've realized that I've never pushed her to do what she didn't want to do sexually so maybe I shouldn't feel bad about this. I'm learning and growing and I need to reread "Double Your Dating" a few more times and start meeting other women, and getting my life together. I care about this girl alot and I care enough to let her go. I've really sensed that she need her space. She's a 20 year old attractive girl and I know that I probably intrigue her since I don't act like other guys in her past.

 

[Andromax]

She's a 20 year old attractive girl and I know that I probably intrigue her since I don't act like other guys in her past.

First of all, don't compare yourself to other guys in her past. This is about you.

Secondly, the questions that you asked, about the condom, mighta been a little cheesy, but it's really not that big of a deal. If this woman was really into you, she would not have made such a big deal about it.

Women her age are often times really inexperienced with sex, and if they have only had one or two partners, they arent going to be very open and secure sexually (of course there are exceptions), so her being turned off by the question is possible. But like I said, if she was really into you, she woulda given you a break.

I'd say to move on, atleast start to. Get a date with another girl, maybe one a little more appreciative of your (seemingly) great oral skills

Come on man, you deserve better than to be treated like this and you know it.

I'm sure you have heard it a lot around here, but be a man, you don't need her. There are millions of chicks that are more mature and appreciative than the way you described her.

Don't call her anymore. If she calls you later on, and wants to make it up to you, then see how that goes, but I'm tellin you now, thats rare, so dont count on it. Better to just get yourself a new sweet heart, or several

And since that is your first relationship, do you honestly only want to be with one girl your whole life? Go hang out with a couple hotties at a bar and then see if you still feel that way...

Your mind can be a trap, and if you go down that path of thinking that you must have a girl back, that has exibited actions that you would not like in a female companion, then you are in a world of hurt, my friend. The good news is, you can change the way you think, it just takes Belief.

Have you completed the DJ Bootcamp? I have just started it, feel free to do it with me, if you like. You can download it for free in PDF format HERE

You can find my notes in the DJ Discussion forum.

Andromax