"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Feeling Less and Less of my Old Self

someone800

Don Juan
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Hey,

Something I just realized is I am feeling less like my old self, which could be a good thing in the whole view of becoming a DJ. The reason, is usually I find myself doing a bunch of different things spending my time on the computer, and now, I try finding reason to even stay on for more than a few minutes. A lot of my old interests/personality is still here, I just don't have the time-consuming type of interest I did before in computer stuff. In trying to think of other ways to spend my time, I got an electric guitar a month ago, but haven't really learned it yet-I am trying to get a job, but that's about it. I want to spend time out at places like the mall hanging out and winging, but I just don't really have friends to do that with, plus if I went myself, my parents would probably get worried since I haven't really done that before.
This brings up another point. Today, I and this one girl I know hanged out at my house for a few hours and something I noticed about myself was my voice was all shaky and I seemed stiff and stuff even though we are pretty good friends. We were talking about people's relationships and stuff and since my parents were in the house, I told her to keep quite when she talked about it (my parents aren't mean about this stuff-it is just they might casually talk to me about it later in a conversational way), and I wouldn't really try to talk about it. I didn't seem to be that exciting and stuff like that. Also, I should note that when I picked her up, I met her dad and said hi to her mom and when I got in the car, she said I seem paranoid around parents (and other people sometimes I should mention). She said her parents love me though :) , but I just seem stiff. The thing is, when say, I am out driving around with friends or going someplace ourselves, I seem to feel a lot more comfortable (not totally-still working on that) and am able to be more expressive and free-talking.
Any suggestions on these experiences?
Thanks.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Evolution

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 7, 2008
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I think your doing great. Your just "transitioning" to the "new" you. It will take sometime but you'll get the hang of it.
 

DJ_Matthew

Don Juan
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Sep 1, 2007
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someone800 said:
Hey,

Something I just realized is I am feeling less like my old self, which could be a good thing in the whole view of becoming a DJ. The reason, is usually I find myself doing a bunch of different things spending my time on the computer, and now, I try finding reason to even stay on for more than a few minutes. A lot of my old interests/personality is still here, I just don't have the time-consuming type of interest I did before in computer stuff. In trying to think of other ways to spend my time, I got an electric guitar a month ago, but haven't really learned it yet-I am trying to get a job, but that's about it. I want to spend time out at places like the mall hanging out and winging, but I just don't really have friends to do that with, plus if I went myself, my parents would probably get worried since I haven't really done that before.
This brings up another point. Today, I and this one girl I know hanged out at my house for a few hours and something I noticed about myself was my voice was all shaky and I seemed stiff and stuff even though we are pretty good friends. We were talking about people's relationships and stuff and since my parents were in the house, I told her to keep quite when she talked about it (my parents aren't mean about this stuff-it is just they might casually talk to me about it later in a conversational way), and I wouldn't really try to talk about it. I didn't seem to be that exciting and stuff like that. Also, I should note that when I picked her up, I met her dad and said hi to her mom and when I got in the car, she said I seem paranoid around parents (and other people sometimes I should mention). She said her parents love me though :) , but I just seem stiff. The thing is, when say, I am out driving around with friends or going someplace ourselves, I seem to feel a lot more comfortable (not totally-still working on that) and am able to be more expressive and free-talking.
Any suggestions on these experiences?
Thanks.
Yeah I'm pretty much in the same boat as you.

I'm very good on computers and I do spend lots of time on it. If you have a passion about computers, why leave it? Becoming a DJ is also about being successful in every aspect of your life (girls, your passion...).

In the end, you never really change, you just become a better version of YOU.
 

SinJester

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2007
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Australia
Beware, the old you will come back to haunt you, when it does, fight it. Don't give in to negative thoughts, you've came too far. Fight it with every once of strength and you shall be victories and the new you will hold and continue improving.
 

BMX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 12, 2004
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Everett
Keep up the good transitioning! You'll still respect yourself and ppl will even respect you more. If people from high school saw me now in college, they would notice the differences in me :up:
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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In Motion

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 5, 2008
Messages
346
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Location
Basically... Everywhere
You really should get started on that guitar. Girls love guitarists. Anyways, if you dont want learn guitar in general learn some naschpiel songs. Popular ones include Halellujah and Tears in heaven. They are pretty easy but enough to impress a girl with.
 
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