Or maybe I'm just having a ninny moment.
Story: Been with girl for two years. Thought I had a good thing going. It's been amazing... until recently. See it started off as a LRD- though we still saw one another every week and chatted on the phone almost everyday, at varying durations. Anything between 15 mins and an hour. Then I moved here start of January to do my postgraduate studies, so it's no longer an LDR. Outside university we see one another say twice a week.
I feel all weird when I look at other couples walking around - who look generally in love. Myself on the other hand, well, I'm walking with my girl of two years not holding hands, talking only about administrative/university topics like, "so when's your next class, did you register successfully?". I can't be, and don't really feel like being ****yfunny, playful, or whatever. Prolly feeling a bit depro - I have my moments when I feel down. When I try put my arm around her, she looks like she didn't notice. When I try hold her hand, she holds it back, but then after a short while finds something to do with that hand (dig in her bag, drink her coke, etc), and when she's done she doesn't take it back. I have to take it again. Our kisses... well, so far it's only been hello and goodbye kisses, and nothing more than a quick peck. Don't even let me start on how we haven't had any intimacy for ages...
She's sickly jealous. "Omg were you just talking to that girl?!?!" There's no history of cheating in our relationship... nothing even close to it. The only time things 'warm up'... is, ironically, over the phone or msn chat while I'm staying in to study or work. Text messages: if you read ours you'd probably throw up a little in your mouth. You know... she still sends me all these 'oh i love you' texts. You'd think we'd be completely different when we're around one another.
Say today, I had a class at two, she had a class at 1. An hour till her class we're both free so we amble about (looking like oldest of friends or something), then I offer to wait with her for her class (she likes to be early for things), we go. Before we get there she suggests I go look for my next venue (I'm new to campus). I feel a bit weirded out (is she just saying that to see what I'll do?) but I go anyway. A minute later I turn around. I forgot to tell her where we'll meet after, cause I have to drive her home and tell her what time I'll pick her up tonight cause we're going out. I get around the corner she's talking to a bunch of friends looking all jolly. No biggie, right?
So I go off and chat up some people outside my lecture hall - oddly, finding much more energy to be humorous and happy around those people whom I don't know. Half way through my class she texts how she loves me.. and "oh, by the way, my dad showed up unexpectedly" to take her home.
I post here every few months, and always with some worry like this. Last time it was because I was behaving jealously, and needed a cold slap in the face. Am I looking at things really badly? I don't think she's found anyone else... I don't get those paranoid thoughts... but I'm sure that things aren't good between us. This is my longest ever relationship... so to some experts out there does it look like we've settled into some sort of 'comfort zone' or are we falling out of love? Is this normal in relationships, does it pass? :-/ I'm puzzled. I'm seeing her tonight... don't really know if I should bring any of these worries up. I'd rather look like a ninny in front of y'all than in front of her. I've got to keep my composure, after all...
Any thoughts?
Story: Been with girl for two years. Thought I had a good thing going. It's been amazing... until recently. See it started off as a LRD- though we still saw one another every week and chatted on the phone almost everyday, at varying durations. Anything between 15 mins and an hour. Then I moved here start of January to do my postgraduate studies, so it's no longer an LDR. Outside university we see one another say twice a week.
I feel all weird when I look at other couples walking around - who look generally in love. Myself on the other hand, well, I'm walking with my girl of two years not holding hands, talking only about administrative/university topics like, "so when's your next class, did you register successfully?". I can't be, and don't really feel like being ****yfunny, playful, or whatever. Prolly feeling a bit depro - I have my moments when I feel down. When I try put my arm around her, she looks like she didn't notice. When I try hold her hand, she holds it back, but then after a short while finds something to do with that hand (dig in her bag, drink her coke, etc), and when she's done she doesn't take it back. I have to take it again. Our kisses... well, so far it's only been hello and goodbye kisses, and nothing more than a quick peck. Don't even let me start on how we haven't had any intimacy for ages...
She's sickly jealous. "Omg were you just talking to that girl?!?!" There's no history of cheating in our relationship... nothing even close to it. The only time things 'warm up'... is, ironically, over the phone or msn chat while I'm staying in to study or work. Text messages: if you read ours you'd probably throw up a little in your mouth. You know... she still sends me all these 'oh i love you' texts. You'd think we'd be completely different when we're around one another.
Say today, I had a class at two, she had a class at 1. An hour till her class we're both free so we amble about (looking like oldest of friends or something), then I offer to wait with her for her class (she likes to be early for things), we go. Before we get there she suggests I go look for my next venue (I'm new to campus). I feel a bit weirded out (is she just saying that to see what I'll do?) but I go anyway. A minute later I turn around. I forgot to tell her where we'll meet after, cause I have to drive her home and tell her what time I'll pick her up tonight cause we're going out. I get around the corner she's talking to a bunch of friends looking all jolly. No biggie, right?
So I go off and chat up some people outside my lecture hall - oddly, finding much more energy to be humorous and happy around those people whom I don't know. Half way through my class she texts how she loves me.. and "oh, by the way, my dad showed up unexpectedly" to take her home.
I post here every few months, and always with some worry like this. Last time it was because I was behaving jealously, and needed a cold slap in the face. Am I looking at things really badly? I don't think she's found anyone else... I don't get those paranoid thoughts... but I'm sure that things aren't good between us. This is my longest ever relationship... so to some experts out there does it look like we've settled into some sort of 'comfort zone' or are we falling out of love? Is this normal in relationships, does it pass? :-/ I'm puzzled. I'm seeing her tonight... don't really know if I should bring any of these worries up. I'd rather look like a ninny in front of y'all than in front of her. I've got to keep my composure, after all...
Any thoughts?
