Feel Like Im Being Cornered

[AJ84]

Way way overthinking it. If you notice that she always seems to need help with everything and is draining you with her wants and needs that’s different, but the woman is moving and assembling furniture lol. Usually, people ask for help doing that. Moving is stressful. She, like that rest of us, just wants to get what needs to be done, done and, like the rest of us, may ask for help and certainly take someone up on the offer to help.

What would be beyond dumb is for her to try to do it herself because her boyfriend doesn’t want to do it based on a principle but doesn’t want another man helping her.

Who has time or patience for that kind of nonsense, hopefully not her.

Yes, some women will try to trap men etc etc, but not everything is a ploy. Not every woman is trying to enslave men lol. Chill on some of this paranoia. Just imagine being on the receiving end of this with some feminist who sees your every move as a plot to control her. How long would you put up with that before bailing?

Honestly this gender conspiracy stuff is the male version of militant feminism.

Not everything is a war.

 

[Epic Days]

Way way overthinking it. If you notice that she always seems to need help with everything and is draining you with her wants and needs that’s different, but the woman is moving and assembling furniture lol. Usually, people ask for help doing that. Moving is stressful. She, like that rest of us, just wants to get what needs to be done, done and, like the rest of us, may ask for help and certainly take someone up on the offer to help.

What would be beyond dumb is for her to try to do it herself because her boyfriend doesn’t want to do it based on a principle but doesn’t want another man helping her.

Who has time or patience for that kind of nonsense, hopefully not her.

Yes, some women will try to trap men etc etc, but not everything is a ploy. Not every woman is trying to enslave men lol. Chill on some of this paranoia. Just imagine being on the receiving end of this with some feminist who sees your every move as a plot to control her. How long would you put up with that before bailing?

Honestly this gender conspiracy stuff is the male version of militant feminism.

Not everything is a war.

LMAO. Yeah follow this advice. She will be there to help him move and lift heavy things when he moves. Lol

 

[AJ84]

LMAO. Yeah follow this advice. She will be there to help him move and lift heavy things when he moves. Lol

Right, because all women will never ever help a man. They will only take and never give right?

Whose to say she would not help him, or make dinner for him or give him a naked massage after heavy lifting? We don’t know because we don’t know her do we? Like I said in my post if he notices that she just takes and gives nothing in return that’s different. But f**k, she’s moving and asked for help. Without knowing anything else about her or the dynamics of their relationship, you’re justification of him not helping her is based on a gender conspiracy theory that women and society condition men to be slaves.

Woman- “Oh honey can you help me assemble a bed?”
Man- “No, because there’s what society and the feminine imperative is telling me to do and I don’t want to be conditioned to be your slave.”
Woman - “ok...........um... yeah I’m going to get someone else to help and I’ll text you later.”

Never hears from her again.

Come on now, it’s not all a battle. I’m not saying women are great and sweet because I know some women are evil lol, but you have this insular view and approach that leaves no room for anything in between and it reminds me of how extreme feminists see things.

One of my co-workers is an extreme feminist and at a work related marathon she saw my husband offer to carry a box of water bottles that I was already carrying and she had the nerve to tell me that he did that not because he was being nice, but because he assumed I was too physically weak as a woman to carry a box of water bottles and it’s a man’s way of showing physical dominance.
I just looked at her and said, “ ok then...” and walked away shaking my head.

Some of your posts reminds me of her. I don’t think it’s bad to be mindful and screen and know what red flags to look for but I do feel that people who see the worst in others will always have that confirmed, not because those people are all bad people but because everything is filtered to be interpreted that way. A lot of feminists do that, I notice.

 

[Epic Days]

Right, because all women will never ever help a man. They will only take and never give right?

Whose to say she would not help him, or make dinner for him or give him a naked massage after heavy lifting? We don’t know because we don’t know her do we? Like I said in my post if he notices that she just takes and gives nothing in return that’s different. But f**k, she’s moving and asked for help. Without knowing anything else about her or the dynamics of their relationship, you’re justification of him not helping her is based on a gender conspiracy theory that women and society condition men to be slaves.

Woman- “Oh honey can you help me assemble a bed?”
Man- “No, because there’s what society and the feminine imperative is telling me to do and I don’t want to be conditioned to be your slave.”
Woman - “ok...........um... yeah I’m going to get someone else to help and I’ll text you later.”

Never hears from her again.

Come on now, it’s not all a battle. I’m not saying women are great and sweet because I know some women are evil lol, but you have this insular view and approach that leaves no room for anything in between and it reminds me of how extreme feminists see things.

One of my co-workers is an extreme feminist and at a work related marathon she saw my husband offer to carry a box of water bottles that I was already carrying and she had the nerve to tell me that he did that not because he was being nice, but because he assumed I was too physically weak as a woman to carry a box of water bottles and it’s a man’s way of showing physical dominance.
I just looked at her and said, “ ok then...” and walked away shaking my head.

Some of your posts reminds me of her. I don’t think it’s bad to be mindful and screen and know what red flags to look for but I do feel that people who see the worst in others will always have that confirmed, not because those people are all bad people but because everything is filtered to be interpreted that way. A lot of feminists do that, I notice.

I understand what you are saying. The OP can do whatever he wants. This is about helping men fight their way out of their trap.
Obviously there are no absolutes and you know that. Saying this is not "All Cases" does not diminish the lesson and is a stupid social convention to manipulate the reality of this conversation.

I don't believe in screening out red flags. Without the influences of their conditioning it isn't a problem.

Here is the real point...as it regards to the discussion between you and I, equality doesn't mean..."I am the same as a man, BUT you still need to be a white knight and help me fulfill my decisions."
A man would have been able to see and look at the future and have secured all the resources needed before hand.
She just ASSUMED she could get her little boyfriend to do it. Why she will put him under the duress of competition by saying she will just get another man to do it instead. This has a nearly unbearable amount of duress on the man and YOU KNOW IT!!!!
So please don't pretend that you don't how easy this is to use on an unaware man as emotional leverage. It is a brutal, absolute brutal, position to put a man in to get compliance. Women thrive on competition anxiety...men do not. In fact it reduces their masculinity if they comply. You have not the capacity to understand the depth of this as a man. To you, its normal manipulation to get what you want. An every day thing.

The second she said, "I will just get the guy from work to do it." He either goes on instant attack for her use of this manipulation or just walked out forever or until she recants for using a stupid manipulation on him.

 

[sazc]

Boundaries, just say no

 

[lamath]

Way way overthinking it. If you notice that she always seems to need help with everything and is draining you with her wants and needs that’s different, but the woman is moving and assembling furniture lol. Usually, people ask for help doing that. Moving is stressful. She, like that rest of us, just wants to get what needs to be done, done and, like the rest of us, may ask for help and certainly take someone up on the offer to help.

What would be beyond dumb is for her to try to do it herself because her boyfriend doesn’t want to do it based on a principle but doesn’t want another man helping her.

Who has time or patience for that kind of nonsense, hopefully not her.

Yes, some women will try to trap men etc etc, but not everything is a ploy. Not every woman is trying to enslave men lol. Chill on some of this paranoia. Just imagine being on the receiving end of this with some feminist who sees your every move as a plot to control her. How long would you put up with that before bailing?

Honestly this gender conspiracy stuff is the male version of militant feminism.

Not everything is a war.

I agree with the overthinking.

Still got to be careful, frog in boiling water.....
So many man get caught playing house when they never had that intention to start with, they get caught into the kind of relationship the women want but not what they want.


Also cant stand the fact that she is trying to guilt trip him.

 

[AJ84]

I understand what you are saying. The OP can do whatever he wants. This is about helping men fight their way out of their trap.
Obviously there are no absolutes and you know that. Saying this is not "All Cases" does not diminish the lesson and is a stupid social convention to manipulate the reality of this conversation.

I don't believe in screening out red flags. Without the influences of their conditioning it isn't a problem.

Here is the real point...as it regards to the discussion between you and I, equality doesn't mean..."I am the same as a man, BUT you still need to be a white knight and help me fulfill my decisions."
A man would have been able to see and look at the future and have secured all the resources needed before hand.
She just ASSUMED she could get her little boyfriend to do it. Why she will put him under the duress of competition by saying she will just get another man to do it instead. This has a nearly unbearable amount of duress on the man and YOU KNOW IT!!!!
So please don't pretend that you don't how easy this is to use on an unaware man as emotional leverage. It is a brutal, absolute brutal, position to put a man in to get compliance. Women thrive on competition anxiety...men do not. In fact it reduces their masculinity if they comply. You have not the capacity to understand the depth of this as a man. To you, its normal manipulation to get what you want. An every day thing.

The second she said, "I will just get the guy from work to do it." He either goes on instant attack for her use of this manipulation or just walked out forever or until she recants for using a stupid manipulation on him.

I never said men have to white knight.

If he doesn’t want to do it he can say no. She has someone else who can help and she told him that. If could be her guilting him or her giving him an out as she has someone else who can help. Without knowing more about her and how she is in their relationship. We don’t know.

But let’s say it is her guilting him. That’s manipulative, yes. She is trying to create an emotion that triggers her desired response.

How it is any different than when men try to create what you call competition anxiety by saying or doing things that make the girl think he’s going to move into to his many options and she has to compete for his affections? (FYI not all women thrive under this like you think).

Female - guilting man by saying another man will help her when her man won’t.

Male- creating fear in woman when he says he will meet up with another girl when she chooses to go see her friends rather than Netflix and chill.

Same intention.

No I’m not a man and I don’t have the capacity to understand the depth of a man, I never said I did.

You are not a woman and hence do not understand the depths of a woman. Not all women are trying to enslave men Epic. I think it’s good to look for the potential danger signs for women who do this but there’s taking it to the extreme sometimes.

If she’s trying to guilt him to do stuff he should move on but without knowing more about her, we really don’t know.

 

[Epic Days]

I never said men have to white knight.

If he doesn’t want to do it he can say no. She has someone else who can help and she told him that. If could be her guilting him or her giving him an out as she has someone else who can help. Without knowing more about her and how she is in their relationship. We don’t know.

But let’s say it is her guilting him. That’s manipulative, yes. She is trying to create an emotion that triggers her desired response.

How it is any different than when men try to create what you call competition anxiety by saying or doing things that make the girl think he’s going to move into to his many options and she has to compete for his affections? (FYI not all women thrive under this like you think).

Female - guilting man by saying another man will help her when her man won’t.

Male- creating fear in woman when he says he will meet up with another girl when she chooses to go see her friends rather than Netflix and chill.

Same intention.

No I’m not a man and I don’t have the capacity to understand the depth of a man, I never said I did.

You are not a woman and hence do not understand the depths of a woman. Not all women are trying to enslave men Epic. I think it’s good to look for the potential danger signs for women who do this but there’s taking it to the extreme sometimes.

If she’s trying to guilt him to do stuff he should move on but without knowing more about her, we really don’t know.

Again this is an attempt to show men and women are the same.

Nearly all your encounters have been with supposed “Alphas”.
You did not sleep with nerds or guys that didn’t turn you on. Unless they had something you want. Your experiences deal with a thin slice of men. The men you wanted to sex you. Plain and simple.
Unless of course you slept with men who didn’t turn you on, in that case, ewww. Never once in my life have I sexed a fat girl. Just gross...
Men who don’t turn you on are really just non-persons to make the world go around. But when it comes to sex, they are completely non-human.

Whereas men, we have observed a plethora of women in all states. We have encountered and tried to bond with most of these types in an effort to connect and experience the woman.

The men who say...”Oh just go sleep with another woman” are just internet nerds and YOU KNOW IT!!!

A man who knows himself would just dismiss her and move on. No need to beat her up or beat her down. Etc.

We are not the same and YOU KNOW IT!!!

Your attempts to justify your position and past are not relevant in this.

 

[BeExcellent]

Black & white thinking gets people into trouble. Lots of black & white thinking in this thread & frankly in many of your threads, @Epic Days.

Maybe the furniture is heavy or awkward. We don’t know. Maybe she isn’t mechanically inclined, we don’t know.

Offering to help somebody move & then not assist with this minor task (in my mind) of assembling something seems silly to me.

I see it like a woman offering to cook a man dinner but refusing to grill the steaks. It’s idiotic. It’s not as though she moves every day and it’s not as though she can’t do it, but if she is worried about not getting it right or not having it safe or it’s heavy or requires 2 people? Better to have help. We don’t know any of those details.

I’ve often done stuff for myself...even when I was very pregnant. Ever seen a really pregnant woman swing a maul to bust out a mortar set floor? Women are capable but sometimes help is safer, faster, better.

Not everything is rooted in “feminine imperative”.

Hell I was the breadwinner facing financial ruin in my divorce. Not every woman is a lazy resource seeking prima donna. That narrative is so tired as to be overly formulaic.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Do you guys think I'm being unreasonable?

Maybe not unreasonable, but definitely unrealistic.

This is the EXACT kind of thing you'll need to get used to.

 

[Epic Days]

Black & white thinking gets people into trouble. Lots of black & white thinking in this thread & frankly in many of your threads, @Epic Days.

Maybe the furniture is heavy or awkward. We don’t know. Maybe she isn’t mechanically inclined, we don’t know.

Offering to help somebody move & then not assist with this minor task (in my mind) of assembling something seems silly to me.

I see it like a woman offering to cook a man dinner but refusing to grill the steaks. It’s idiotic. It’s not as though she moves every day and it’s not as though she can’t do it, but if she is worried about not getting it right or not having it safe or it’s heavy or requires 2 people? Better to have help. We don’t know any of those details.

I’ve often done stuff for myself...even when I was very pregnant. Ever seen a really pregnant woman swing a maul to bust out a mortar set floor? Women are capable but sometimes help is safer, faster, better.

Not everything is rooted in “feminine imperative”.

Hell I was the breadwinner facing financial ruin in my divorce. Not every woman is a lazy resource seeking prima donna. That narrative is so tired as to be overly formulaic.

You misunderstood. It’s not black and white. There are no absolutes when dealing with abstract ideas.

But I can see why your mind jumped to that. It’s normal.

First off he agreed to move her. Obviously the furniture will have too much weight for her. Pretty normal stuff. I’ve helped others move and they have helped me move.
I know this is a manipulation of the paradigm and thought process by you but I don’t mind playing along.

The crux of the situation came up when she wanted him to put together her daughters furniture. When he balked (baseball pitching term), he mentioned how she will get another man to do it.

That’s where her entitlement reared it’s ugly head. This is when the masculine must arise.

A man would have planned the resources out. She didn’t because she can get a man to comply with her wants. There’s more to it but you will have to be a good girl and go back and read it. It’s a good read. She put him under competition anxiety and that’s a manipulation boldly thrown down to the deck like a gauntlet. It works. Otherwise she wouldn’t have used it.

 

[AJ84]

Again this is an attempt to show men and women are the same.

Nearly all your encounters have been with supposed “Alphas”.
You did not sleep with nerds or guys that didn’t turn you on. Unless they had something you want. Your experiences deal with a thin slice of men. The men you wanted to sex you. Plain and simple.
Unless of course you slept with men who didn’t turn you on, in that case, ewww. Never once in my life have I sexed a fat girl. Just gross...
Men who don’t turn you on are really just non-persons to make the world go around. But when it comes to sex, they are completely non-human.

Whereas men, we have observed a plethora of women in all states. We have encountered and tried to bond with most of these types in an effort to connect and experience the woman.

The men who say...”Oh just go sleep with another woman” are just internet nerds and YOU KNOW IT!!!

A man who knows himself would just dismiss her and move on. No need to beat her up or beat her down. Etc.

We are not the same and YOU KNOW IT!!!

Your attempts to justify your position and past are not relevant in this.

I stated that both men and women are capable of manipulation in a relationship which is very very true. Human beings, in general, can and do manipulate people in various situations not just in relationships. In that regard we are the same.

Also, you are telling me who I did/ didn’t sleep with and what kind of males I interact with, even though you don’t actually know me nor my sexual history other than that I’m married and have a child. That is quite the projection.

I can’t believe that a post about a guy who thinks his gf is quilting him into assembling a bed has turned into this crazyiness and I can’t believe I’m f**king contributing to it.

 

[spinich]

Just a thought...but if a man enjoys a woman and she is loyal to him, I for one would ENJOY doing crap like this. Mundane tasks can be mutually enjoyed as a couple. Guess I must be naive and old school but feel it's part of a man's leadership role in a relationship to volunteer to do stuff for his partner. No deep drama or manipulation, just a guy and girl supporting each others strengths and weakness. Kind of thought that is what most men would want to do for his mate. But I guess if you thrive on making everything adversarial carry on....

 

[Epic Days]

I can’t believe that a post about a guy who thinks his gf is quilting him into assembling a bed has turned into this crazyiness and I can’t believe I’m f**king contributing to it.

No. Manipulated him into putting the furniture together by using competition anxiety.
Another guy.
You know exactly what I’m talking about. Lol
This is a death nail for a man. The use of competition anxiety to get him to comply is a manipulation married men know well. I’ve heard wives say it. Lol

 

[Epic Days]

Just a thought...but if a man enjoys a woman and she is loyal to him, I for one would ENJOY doing crap like this. Mundane tasks can be mutually enjoyed as a couple. Guess I must be naive and old school but feel it's part of a man's leadership role in a relationship to volunteer to do stuff for his partner. No deep drama or manipulation, just a guy and girl supporting each others strengths and weakness. Kind of thought that is what most men would want to do for his mate. But I guess if you thrive on making everything adversarial carry on....

In this context, for the most part, I agree. When the use of competition anxiety came up, the game changed.
The lesson is in the use of competition anxiety as a manipulative tool. That’s why these women keep obfuscating the subject by conveniently bypassing it. This is called gaslighting. LMAO

Personally I don’t care what they write on here. I just want men to see the intent behind the use of competition anxiety to get compliance from a man.

Women thrive on competition anxiety and love the game of keeping her man or workhorse or whatever.

Men collapse under competition anxiety and never really understand what’s going on. It’s painful in some instances. After all the things he’s done for her...they don’t matter now. She never sees those things because she thinks it’s her birthright to get work or material from men. It puts him in a mental condition where he now believes that he is easily replaceable over putting furniture together. In a sense he is because the normal man IS replaceable. But he caught this little gem because he was aware and is becoming more perceptive to his own programming. Kudos to the OP. Nice work.

The man she REALLY wants will shove her attempt at competition anxiety up her arse.

 

[spinich]

In that context I am in agreement with you.

 

[AJ84]

No. Manipulated him into putting the furniture together by using competition anxiety.
Another guy.
You know exactly what I’m talking about. Lol
This is a death nail for a man. The use of competition anxiety to get him to comply is a manipulation married men know well. I’ve heard wives say it. Lol

I’m not saying some women don’t do this. We don’t know for sure what her intentions are. Like I said before, if that’s what’s she doing he should move on.

Maybe I’m looking at it from my perspective which is I just want help assembling a bed, you don’t want to do it, ok fine I’ll get someone else, I got lots to do because I’m in the process of moving so....

I know I would not be tolerating a gender conspiracy reason around not helping me because my personal patience for bs drama when I’m trying to get work done is basically nil, I would just move on to the work I have to do to get moved in.

But that’s me, and maybe you’re right, maybe she’s trying to condition him to be her slave or whatever. I just can’t keep going around and around.

I guess the best solution would be for her to hire professional movers and pay someone to assemble the bed. Can we agree on that lol.

 

[Epic Days]

I’m not saying some women don’t do this. We don’t know for sure what her intentions are. Like I said before, if that’s what’s she doing he should move on.

Maybe I’m looking at it from my perspective which is I just want help assembling a bed, you don’t want to do it, ok fine I’ll get someone else, I got lots to do because I’m in the process of moving so....

I know I would not be tolerating a gender conspiracy reason around not helping me because my personal patience for bs drama when I’m trying to get work done is basically nil, I would just move on to the work I have to do to get moved in.

But that’s me, and maybe you’re right, maybe she’s trying to condition him to be her slave or whatever. I just can’t keep going around and around.

I guess the best solution would be for her to hire professional movers and pay someone to assemble the bed. Can we agree on that lol.

Fair enough. I just wonder what the thoughts are when she needs someone else to put a bed together and she has to jump to another guy to get her responsibilities handled for her. My daughter bought a bed from IKEA. Naturally you have to assemble it. I went over to her first apartment and changed the P-Trap under her kitchen sink. It was grease clogged and was very slow draining. She was sitting on the floor with the directions to assembling the bed laid out and was putting it together with simple hand tools.

So how much time is wasted for some women to go find a guy to put something together? She could literally put her daughter on the floor in a sleeping bag because Billybob wouldn't put the bed together. How lazy is that? So inept that she can't even do simple tasks and gets men to do them for her. She will wait until she can get another human being to effectively create her survival for her and her daughter.

There are so many things in this that I wouldn't even try to list them. What men in relationships should know is this thing called competition anxiety and how it is effectively used against them as a manipulation tool and if they comply she will most likely bounce on him later on if he continues to fall for it.

 

[Stoic]

I understand what you're saying OP. And maybe it can become a slippery slope.

But, agreeing to help move furniture and then not helping out to assemble some for the daughter seems petty. You're not becoming her surrogate dad just by assembling something for her.

Just my opinion.

 

[Spaz]

I understand what you're saying OP. And maybe it can become a slippery slope.

But, agreeing to help move furniture and then not helping out to assemble some for the daughter seems petty. You're not becoming her surrogate dad just by assembling something for her.

Just my opinion.

It is petty.

He dates a single mom and expects to be treated like a king?

Only a cuck dates single mom's and after being warned repeatedly on this site they deserved everything coming their way.

Feminine imperative = her survival (includes lifestyle) 1st and that of her offsprings being 2nd.

OP as a man is merely an extention or means to fulfil the feminine imperative of that single mom.

When are men going to learn to use their brains?