"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Feel like a bit of a chump

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Mikey C

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I met this girl in an intensive english teaching job. We hit it off and I make her laugh. She's asked if I was seeing anyone and has demonstrated the typical IOIS. She's 10 years younger as well. She plays the guitar as I do and has asked me to come round to hers to change her strings.."and we can have a few beers"

The course just lasted a month and finished yesterday with a staff dinner. There were about ten people there. There was a noticeable increase in kino, but the drink was also flowing and I got drunk. Not silly drunk, I was in control but drunk all the same. When we were walking to get a taxi she said" I'm just going home for a shower and straight to bed. I'm so tired."

Of course that meant nothing for me in the bedroom department. I hid my disappointment and walked her to taxi and gave her a goodbye hug and kiss on the cheek. I'm cringeing now thinking about the cheek thing. So afc. She repeated the the guitar thing but I reckon if she was really into me she would've ****ed me last night.

I'm spinning plates and doing things right in general but last night was a downer.

Next move is basically "no contact" go ghost right?
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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hockeyfreak79

hockeyfreak79

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Yeah she probably wasn't interested in sloppy booze sex. Watch your intake, drink more water. She'll contact you, that's your green light to schedule the guitar string fixing. Become the teacher, make her do it. It's not that difficult.

Escalate! The guitar fixing is just an innocent excuse, you know that.
 
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Mikey C

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Cheers man. If she doesn't contact in a couple of days do you reckon I should open up contact again?

I'm definately giving up alcohol after this. Just too messy and leads to poor decisions.
 
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MrWiggles

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Dont complicate it. She is obviously into you and there could have been reasons why she didnt **** you that night. Maybe she WAS tired or maybe she was on her period or was too drunk so just contact her in a couple days or whatever but i bet she will contact u first
 
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Mikey C

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Thanks. I contacted her on Monday. Probably should have waited. Anyway, we arranged for tomorrow and she's just texted saying she can't. She countered with next Tuesday which is 6 days away. I feel it's losing momentum as I was getting psyched up to escalate for tomorrow. Let's see what happens.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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sodbuster

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I have a massage therapist like that..... she's sick or she can't find a sitter, or??? She's the best massage therapist I've had and will do a 150 minute massage. BUT, she's NOT dependable. I have 3 others I will use before her for that reason..... My back is my livelihood. IF I can't bend over, I can't work. Sorry if this sounds like a parable, but I guess it is........
 
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Mikey C

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You got it right sodbuster.

It's my fault too for not striking while the iron was hot. I'm just 3 months out if an 18 month relationship. Rusty.

Anyway, she rescheduled for tomorrow and when I texted to confirm she put it off to Thursday. I'm free Thursday but I said I was busy, and for the rest of the week. Needed to regain some frame. She's got my number if she wants to meet up.
 
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dude99

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Mikey C said:
You got it right sodbuster.

It's my fault too for not striking while the iron was hot. I'm just 3 months out if an 18 month relationship. Rusty.

Anyway, she rescheduled for tomorrow and when I texted to confirm she put it off to Thursday. I'm free Thursday but I said I was busy, and for the rest of the week. Needed to regain some frame. She's got my number if she wants to meet up.
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Way too many flakes. Next her. If she is interested at all it's very very low.
 
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