"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Fear of Success? WTF is wrong with me?

ThatGuyOverThere

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 23, 2008
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First, I want to give a background on my history with women. I've yet to have my real "first kiss". Yes, I'm embarrassed by it, as I am a senior in high school. I've only had one girlfriend, and that was seven years ago in sixth grade, so that hardly counts (though it did last three months and we went on several dates). I've played spin the bottle once, but that was also in sixth grade and is my only kissing experience.

Once puberty hit, I became a total AFC and I've only recently started to recover. I am no longer intimidated (for the most part) by women and am building a reputation as a big flirt. In one of my classes I meet with groups of freshmen twice a week (I'm their "leader"). We just got new partners for the semester and I'm with a girl that I have a thing for. Pretty much every interaction I have with this girl is flirting, which is why everyone else in the class thinks our partnership will fail. However, every time I think of where I could go with this girl, I become afraid.

OK, so I know how to flirt, but beyond that, I don't have a clue. I've had barely any kissing experience, and instead of being excited about the possibility of hooking up with this girl, I'm more afraid of screwing up and being a horrible kisser. And don't get me started on thinking ahead to possibilities of having sex. If I've never done it before, then how am I going to know what to do? Reading about it isn't going to help. I know some people say to just perform on instincts, but I don't trust mine. How do I get over this? It's really hurting my attempts at gaming. I really want to take the next step, but can't seem to get this fear out of my head. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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tsmith2334

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 4, 2007
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761
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16
Location
NC
I have a fear a success too (though mine is probably on a bigger scale) that I am trying to get over. I'm trying to make a lot of progress in the next couple of months, we'll see how that goes.

But I do have encouragement for you, my first kiss came pretty late too (end of high school), and it actually went great. I was laying in bed with a girl and I just bit the bullet and kissed her. From there, she started making out with me, talk about a confidence booster.

Back then, eben based off little experience, I had heard that I was a good kisser. I think the key is to be slow and easy, and risk being "soft" as opposed to being sloppy. If you follow your instincts, you might not do so bad.

And just as an extra tip, this site has lots of good information. I remember it studying it in middle school... :crackup:
http://www.howtokiss.info/
 

BoredDude

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 19, 2007
Messages
101
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The only thing wrong with you is thinking there is something wrong with yourself.

And don't worry you're still young and college is much cooler than high school anyways. Oh and chicks are easier or so it seems.
 
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