When it came to approaching women, my biggest issue was fear of rejection.
I remember my first rejection. Man was I disappointed; I kept thinking about what I did wrong, why it happened, that it was all my fault and that the same thing would happen again if I approached another girl. My intentions were to eliminate my fear of rejection with more approaches but with the mentality I had at the time my fear of rejection increased instead.
I realized that I blamed everything on me instead of thinking of other reasons why the rejection occurred. I decided to focus on my mistakes but rather than to punish me, use them to learn from them, get better, and not make them again.
I gave myself a chance to realize that, not always, it was my fault that I was rejected. I say "not always" because I have to admit I have approached just for the sake of approaching and girls have sensed that and rejected me.
Guess what? Lesson learned. I'll no longer approach just to approach, I'll have a genuine excuse to talk to her/them in order to approach.
There are reasons, others than the mistakes I may have made, that could end in a rejection.
1) She may have just got out of a relationship and wanted nothing to do with anyone.
2) She is serious with someone and want's it to stay that way.
3) She is a lesbian.
4) Her boyfriend went to get her something and will return in 2 minutes and she wants to protect you by letting you go with her rejection.
But really, I learned to take it a lot less seriously as there are tons of reasons why it might have happened.
Now that I have the knowledge I've gained from this place and advice from friends I've noticed that rejection isn't even occurring as frequently as I thought it would back when I was terrified by it.
Ever heard: "You won't know how it tastes until you try it?".
I never thought it could be applied into rejection until I looked at it with the eyes of a better man. The taste of rejection might not be good but after it happens to find a place in your plate called life a couple of times its taste looses strength until it becomes tasteless. It might become an ingredient you might have a few times but nothing that will make the rest of the meal better nor worse.
So do what I'm doing and let's go and get rejected.
You'll be surprised, maybe it doesn't happen as much as you thought it would (and if it does, so what? you're still standing. Look at your reflection in the nearest mirror. You are still in one piece, shake it off and go talk to that other beautiful girl whose reflection you can also see on that mirror).
You don't fear rejection anymore. Why? because to an AFC it is rejection but, to you, it's just a learning experience.
-VdoubleR
I remember my first rejection. Man was I disappointed; I kept thinking about what I did wrong, why it happened, that it was all my fault and that the same thing would happen again if I approached another girl. My intentions were to eliminate my fear of rejection with more approaches but with the mentality I had at the time my fear of rejection increased instead.
I realized that I blamed everything on me instead of thinking of other reasons why the rejection occurred. I decided to focus on my mistakes but rather than to punish me, use them to learn from them, get better, and not make them again.
I gave myself a chance to realize that, not always, it was my fault that I was rejected. I say "not always" because I have to admit I have approached just for the sake of approaching and girls have sensed that and rejected me.
Guess what? Lesson learned. I'll no longer approach just to approach, I'll have a genuine excuse to talk to her/them in order to approach.
There are reasons, others than the mistakes I may have made, that could end in a rejection.
1) She may have just got out of a relationship and wanted nothing to do with anyone.
2) She is serious with someone and want's it to stay that way.
3) She is a lesbian.
4) Her boyfriend went to get her something and will return in 2 minutes and she wants to protect you by letting you go with her rejection.
But really, I learned to take it a lot less seriously as there are tons of reasons why it might have happened.
Now that I have the knowledge I've gained from this place and advice from friends I've noticed that rejection isn't even occurring as frequently as I thought it would back when I was terrified by it.
Ever heard: "You won't know how it tastes until you try it?".
I never thought it could be applied into rejection until I looked at it with the eyes of a better man. The taste of rejection might not be good but after it happens to find a place in your plate called life a couple of times its taste looses strength until it becomes tasteless. It might become an ingredient you might have a few times but nothing that will make the rest of the meal better nor worse.
So do what I'm doing and let's go and get rejected.
You'll be surprised, maybe it doesn't happen as much as you thought it would (and if it does, so what? you're still standing. Look at your reflection in the nearest mirror. You are still in one piece, shake it off and go talk to that other beautiful girl whose reflection you can also see on that mirror).
You don't fear rejection anymore. Why? because to an AFC it is rejection but, to you, it's just a learning experience.
-VdoubleR