englishman
Master Don Juan
Anyone had a fear of flying and got over it? If you did how did you do it? I'm going on another long flight soon and want to try overcome this dread of the old airplane.
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You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Fear of flying?
- Thread starter englishman
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"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
5string
Master Don Juan
I used to dread it. How did I get over it?
I kept doing it as I had no other choice as it was for work.
Got me some earplugs. Blocks the jet noise. Plus, can't hear the snot nosed little brats carrying on in the plane cuz their sister stole their lollipop. Take a book as well. Maybe an ipod.
Remember, it's more likely that you'll be kidnapped by aliens rather than going down in an airplane. Just keep flying.
I kept doing it as I had no other choice as it was for work.
Got me some earplugs. Blocks the jet noise. Plus, can't hear the snot nosed little brats carrying on in the plane cuz their sister stole their lollipop. Take a book as well. Maybe an ipod.
Remember, it's more likely that you'll be kidnapped by aliens rather than going down in an airplane. Just keep flying.
Read this book:
http://www.amazon.com/Flying-Without-Fear-Duane-Brown/dp/1572240423
It helped me a great deal, the fear of flying will never really go away but you can certainly minimize its effect greatly by learning the facts of flying, the psychology behind the fear of flying and coping skills in dealing with anxiety before and during the flight.
http://www.amazon.com/Flying-Without-Fear-Duane-Brown/dp/1572240423
It helped me a great deal, the fear of flying will never really go away but you can certainly minimize its effect greatly by learning the facts of flying, the psychology behind the fear of flying and coping skills in dealing with anxiety before and during the flight.
Mike32ct
Master Don Juan
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I used to be very afraid to fly. After going on enough flights, I overcame it. Now, I just find it very boring sitting there for hours. But that is certainly an improvement.
I can suggest a few things that helped me:
1. I'm usually exhausted when I fly. Between staying up late packing and getting to the airport early, I can't wait to board the plane and go right to sleep. Being tired may dull the fear and allow you to sleep on and off.
2. Chat up the flight attendant when she comes around for drinks. Obviously she's busy and can't talk long, but it helps. It will remind you (at least subconsciously) that you are not alone on this flight. Is she afraid to fly? Of course not. It's her job. Flying is no big deal to her. This may help you internalize that it is no big deal to her and shouldn't be for you either.
3. Likewise you could chat with a seatmate. This works especially well if that person looks like a veteran flyer, such a business person. Again similar to #2, it reminds you that you are not alone and people fly all the time. The conversation can also distract you from your fear.
4. Bring music to listen to. Pick some fun songs to improve your mood and distract you.
Most of all, you will overcome this as you fly more and more.
I can suggest a few things that helped me:
1. I'm usually exhausted when I fly. Between staying up late packing and getting to the airport early, I can't wait to board the plane and go right to sleep. Being tired may dull the fear and allow you to sleep on and off.
2. Chat up the flight attendant when she comes around for drinks. Obviously she's busy and can't talk long, but it helps. It will remind you (at least subconsciously) that you are not alone on this flight. Is she afraid to fly? Of course not. It's her job. Flying is no big deal to her. This may help you internalize that it is no big deal to her and shouldn't be for you either.
3. Likewise you could chat with a seatmate. This works especially well if that person looks like a veteran flyer, such a business person. Again similar to #2, it reminds you that you are not alone and people fly all the time. The conversation can also distract you from your fear.
4. Bring music to listen to. Pick some fun songs to improve your mood and distract you.
Most of all, you will overcome this as you fly more and more.
Quiksilver
Master Don Juan
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My only fear related to flying is getting groped by a hefty TSA girl in the airport. 
I've been on countless flights and had some nervous moments. Had a 747 with engine failure on a trans-pacific flight, had an aborted landing in an extreme crosswind, and had smoke in the cabin. Not to mention numerous annoyances: towbar breaking on the runway causing a missed connection flight, passport expired mid-trip, traffic jam prior to takeoff again causing missed connection, passenger decided to get off at the last second and they spent 2 hours finding his luggage, and many many others.
Best airlines: QANTAS, Singapore airlines, Virgin blue
Worst airlines: United Airlines, Air Canada, Garuda Indonesia
Never had a hassle-free trip with United Airlines. They always connect me with QANTAS on my flights, and QANTAS does a great job cleaning up the mess.
Keys to a happy flight: Bring lots of money to buy those expensive sandwiches in the terminals. Buy a few of them and bring them on board the long flights. Also plenty of water, airplane cabins are dehydrating. Good headphones/ear plugs. Sleep. Flip-flops, shoes and socks suck. Sunglasses. Deodorant. Warm sweater.
That is for the long flights. Some of mine have taken 60-75 hours from door to door.
--
Still, only fear is that fatty with rubber gloves in the security check.
I've been on countless flights and had some nervous moments. Had a 747 with engine failure on a trans-pacific flight, had an aborted landing in an extreme crosswind, and had smoke in the cabin. Not to mention numerous annoyances: towbar breaking on the runway causing a missed connection flight, passport expired mid-trip, traffic jam prior to takeoff again causing missed connection, passenger decided to get off at the last second and they spent 2 hours finding his luggage, and many many others.
Best airlines: QANTAS, Singapore airlines, Virgin blue
Worst airlines: United Airlines, Air Canada, Garuda Indonesia
Never had a hassle-free trip with United Airlines. They always connect me with QANTAS on my flights, and QANTAS does a great job cleaning up the mess.
Keys to a happy flight: Bring lots of money to buy those expensive sandwiches in the terminals. Buy a few of them and bring them on board the long flights. Also plenty of water, airplane cabins are dehydrating. Good headphones/ear plugs. Sleep. Flip-flops, shoes and socks suck. Sunglasses. Deodorant. Warm sweater.
That is for the long flights. Some of mine have taken 60-75 hours from door to door.
--
Still, only fear is that fatty with rubber gloves in the security check.
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Mr.Positive
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I used to have a fear of flying. In fact, my first time on an airplane I was about 21 years old at the time.
What I did to cure it, was get on an airplane for the first time, and jump out of it. Skydiving. It was a challenge getting on that plane and experience flying for the first time, then to stand out the door and jump.
The next flight I took was a piece of cake after that.
I still had a fear of heights though, so I took up rock climbing. Now I have no fear of heights.
What I did to cure it, was get on an airplane for the first time, and jump out of it. Skydiving. It was a challenge getting on that plane and experience flying for the first time, then to stand out the door and jump.
The next flight I took was a piece of cake after that.
I still had a fear of heights though, so I took up rock climbing. Now I have no fear of heights.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
Mr. Pos, I have an extreme fear of heights and flying, and have thought about doing both of those things.
I have always been afraid to fly, but when I lived across country a few years ago, I'd fly back and forth just because it was so cheap and easy. One time however, we hit an air pocket and turbulence, and the plane took a dive. We flew the entire 700 miles so close to the ground afterwards, that I could see the topography below. I'll never forget the lady's face in front of me, who turned around to look at me, and her eyes were wide with "this is it! We are going down!" And the airline attendants, and the cart where drinks went flying, and the pilot yelling over the intercom "Flight attendants! SIT DOWN!!!!"
I tried to fly again a month after that, and my body was so tense from fear that I was in pain for days after. I only drove after that. Still to this day, I nearly have panic attacks when I have to fly, which has only been twice. I try to find some drug dealing kid so I can buy some Xanax and anything that will knock me out, otherwise I risk OD'ing on Dramamine.
Hope one day soon I will get over this, as I love to travel and planes are the best way to get to far distances quickly. I am thinking about investing in a parachute.
I have always been afraid to fly, but when I lived across country a few years ago, I'd fly back and forth just because it was so cheap and easy. One time however, we hit an air pocket and turbulence, and the plane took a dive. We flew the entire 700 miles so close to the ground afterwards, that I could see the topography below. I'll never forget the lady's face in front of me, who turned around to look at me, and her eyes were wide with "this is it! We are going down!" And the airline attendants, and the cart where drinks went flying, and the pilot yelling over the intercom "Flight attendants! SIT DOWN!!!!"
I tried to fly again a month after that, and my body was so tense from fear that I was in pain for days after. I only drove after that. Still to this day, I nearly have panic attacks when I have to fly, which has only been twice. I try to find some drug dealing kid so I can buy some Xanax and anything that will knock me out, otherwise I risk OD'ing on Dramamine.
Hope one day soon I will get over this, as I love to travel and planes are the best way to get to far distances quickly. I am thinking about investing in a parachute.
Quiksilver said:My only fear related to flying is getting groped by a hefty TSA girl in the airport.
I've been on countless flights and had some nervous moments. Had a 747 with engine failure on a trans-pacific flight, had an aborted landing in an extreme crosswind, and had smoke in the cabin. Not to mention numerous annoyances: towbar breaking on the runway causing a missed connection flight, passport expired mid-trip, traffic jam prior to takeoff again causing missed connection, passenger decided to get off at the last second and they spent 2 hours finding his luggage, and many many others.
Best airlines: QANTAS, Singapore airlines, Virgin blue
Worst airlines: United Airlines, Air Canada, Garuda Indonesia
Never had a hassle-free trip with United Airlines. They always connect me with QANTAS on my flights, and QANTAS does a great job cleaning up the mess.
Keys to a happy flight: Bring lots of money to buy those expensive sandwiches in the terminals. Buy a few of them and bring them on board the long flights. Also plenty of water, airplane cabins are dehydrating. Good headphones/ear plugs. Sleep. Flip-flops, shoes and socks suck. Sunglasses. Deodorant. Warm sweater.
That is for the long flights. Some of mine have taken 60-75 hours from door to door.
--
Still, only fear is that fatty with rubber gloves in the security check.
Singapore Airlines has been direct from Houston, Texas (USA) to Moscow, Russia for over a year now. Makes that journey pure pleasure. ALL American Airlines are HELL! The fat old women and gay men who who serve you are a joke. Singapore Airlines has proper stewardesses who actually keep the bathrooms clean! They also have an amazing drink list. Like a bar on the plane. All complimentary. If you are flying from or to the Middle East look at Emirates. As good as any. Never went to Australia so I have no clue about Qantas.
Actually, Ukraine International Airlines is pretty nice if you connect within Europe or the Middle East. Not bad at all. They have strict policies about who they hire. Lots of teenage stewardesses who are not jerks to deal with. Amazing the horrible attitude and advanced ages of what you see on American and West European airlines.
Airports? American airports are HELL. Customs scares the hell out of me and I am totally innocent! Sad that as a 100% innocent American traveler I feel uncomfortable entering or leaving my country of birth!
Best Airports I Have Been To -- German and Dutch airports are always efficient and easy. RIX (Riga International) is my favorite though. Tons of cafes and bars and it is a relatively small new airport. Plus, Riga is just an awesome city that will make you curse all Western girls. Domodedovo in Moscow is great. Sad that Singapore Airlines (Moscow-Houston) is basically the only American route that leaves from there. Most Americans and Westerners end up using the hell that is Sheremetyevo! That is not a nice place! Montreal has a terminal just for American flights. I find that to be the best Terminal I have been in when it comes to North America. My favorite airport for travel to the USA is.....Warsaw International. The security is quick and easy. Tons of places to get a drink or coffee. You don't get sealed off in a cubicle if you are going to America. Direct flights to Chicago via LOT. It is new and airy. Switzerland is also a pretty cool venue. But, that shouldn't surprise anyone. Oh yeah, CDG in Paris is pretty but sucks. That U2 video made it look cooler than it is.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=co6WMzDOh1o&ob=av3e
I remember scheduling a transfer to Ukraine via Paris just because of the visuals from this video.
My big issue (outside of insanely stupid security) with American airports and airlines is that it has become something that "everyman" does. I wish prices went WAY up and service was improved like in the old days. Eliminate the crap that you see using the airports. I also think all military in uniform should only use military airports. I don't need to see WWIII in an airport.
Vice
Master Don Juan
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Learn about the facts of flying, and you should be good.
I also reccommend reading Chuck Yeager's novel, "Yeager". That will help you realize that you're flying from point A to point B, where he was flying from point A to point B while getting shot at, sometimes landing at point K, or in several cases, his plane landing at point P and him touching down at point R a little bit later.
I also reccommend reading Chuck Yeager's novel, "Yeager". That will help you realize that you're flying from point A to point B, where he was flying from point A to point B while getting shot at, sometimes landing at point K, or in several cases, his plane landing at point P and him touching down at point R a little bit later.