Fear of a first kiss / intimacy?

[regular_guy]

I met this girl through salsa dancing. We met once for dancing, went for coffee once, and the last time went once again for some dancing. The club was a lot of fun, we danced for 3 hours. Had a blast. In the club I introduced her to another girl I met in another salsa class, which probably made me look good. The dancing also got a little heavy when the club music came on instead of salsa. I was dancing with three feet at some points. She looked like she way having a good time, we laughed a lot while dancing.

Any who. Our get together came to an end, we got our coats and walked of to my car. I started the car, and drove her to her car. (We have met at the mall before going to the club). On the ride back I asked her if she had fun, she said yes. She asks the same question in return and “I say yes it was good, a little too good”. She was surprised by my second comment, I was to a little. I parked my car next to her, and ask her to go ahead and warm up her car. She does that, comes back and sits next to me.

Now this is where It gets a little awkward, I knew she wanted a kiss. I wanted to give her one too, but I did not know how to go about it. I got all uncomfortable and fearful. It was an intimate moment. Not knowing how to handle it I told her “to get lost”. Her “oww so now its get lost?” The last thing she did is she gave me a kiss on the cheek and left.

I don’t know if she found my behavior cute, or did I just creep her out with my behavior. I want to call her and just ask how she is? And tell her I’am glad what has happened but I did not expect it. What you guys think?

In the end I am glad I had this experience, because it showed me I have to work on myself more. Enjoy myself more, etc.

 

[Mr. Wolf]

On how to go about it. When you feel uncompfortable and don't know what to do and about to tell her to get lost, reach out to her, brush her hair with your hand, and kiss her.

All the while making sure it's natural and you are 200% confident..

No tongue, just a nice kiss, sort of short.. Then accuse her of being too forward and push her away.

Oh, don't forget to ask her if she wants to watch some movies at your place right now.

 

[regular_guy]

Hey Mr. Wolf,

Thanks for the heads up. Wish I was just more prepared and someone tell me that earlier, I will know for next time though. Never been in that situation before. BTW she is 4 yeards older then me. i.e. 28 vs 24, but that should not matter.

So do I even mention my behaviour the next time I talk to her? Or just invite her on another date / get together? Invite her for a movie? That's pretty balzy. I live with my parents, so its not the best option. She has her own place, but I cant jsut invite myself.

 

[DonJuan11]

Not knowing how to handle it I told her “to get lost”.

Putting down a girl you like always increases her Interest Level in you. You should have added "Bvtch" to it, that would have got her juices flowing.

 

[Supremo]

Well how old are you?
I really do think it does matter. You can get away with not kissing a girl for a while a little longer in high school than you can later in life.

It seems though that she does like you. A kiss on the cheek initiated by her is a GOOD sign man. You pulled off some serious C&F and executed one of the best tactics a DJ can use, pulling out at the high point. Just MAKE SURE you do it next time or else she will catch on to your lack of confidence in escalating.

Honestly, just do it. She kissed you. If you feel that same vibe you got the first time you guys went out, no problem you got it in the bag.

 

[dre007]

the nike commercial couldn't have said it any better man...just do it. and stop thinking about it, ull feel much better u did afterwards

 

[dre007]

the nike commercial couldn't have said it any better man...just do it. and stop thinking about it, ull feel much better u did afterwards

 

[regular_guy]

Putting down a girl you like always increases her Interest Level in you. You should have added "Bvtch" to it, that would have got her juices flowing.

The thing is I wanted to kiss her. I got uncomfortable and I told her to get lost, because I made myself feel like **** in my inability to close.

Well how old are you?
I really do think it does matter. You can get away with not kissing a girl for a while a little longer in high school than you can later in life.

It seems though that she does like you. A kiss on the cheek initiated by her is a GOOD sign man. You pulled off some serious C&F and executed one of the best tactics a DJ can use, pulling out at the high point. Just MAKE SURE you do it next time or else she will catch on to your lack of confidence in escalating.

Honestly, just do it. She kissed you. If you feel that same vibe you got the first time you guys went out, no problem you got it in the bag.

I am 24 and still have a V card, ****. I just want to get it over with. It was not C&F, because there was no confidence in the line. Yeah the last thing was a kiss on the cheek, which I also though was a good sign. And this would be the third time we got together outside of the regular salsa class.

the nike commercial couldn't have said it any better man...just do it. and stop thinking about it, ull feel much better u did afterwards

Yeah, I hear you. I beaten myself enough over such silliness.

So I last saw her 2 weeks ago, when we went dancing together. I called her last Wednesday, asking how things are going. Did some small talk about the get-together, gym, yoga..etc. At the end of the conversation I apologized if I have made her feel uncomfortable. She said she was not weirded out and was surprised that I left so quickly. I am not sure what she meant my that. I am assuming its something good . At the end, the conversation slowed down and she said so you called to apologize about friday? I started showing some emotion towards her... then I said "I am talking to much", and I going to go ahead and drink my protein shake and take a shower. We both laughed and I hung up. The conversation lasted 5 mins. I did not want to talk to her for too long. I have not spoken to her since last Wednesday (9 days ago). Can anyone see that I am a noob. lol. I would love to have sex with her, but I may be playing the relationship card. And I will not know if she is interested in me until I take charge and make some bold moves. Lead her into things, just like salsa. What would be your next step? I was thinking of calling her and asking if she wants to go skating or something.

 

[regular_guy]

bump!