SeymourCake
Banned
- Joined
- Apr 9, 2010
- Messages
- 1,523
- Reaction score
- 363
Mine would be none other than...
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Favorite President of the United States of America?
- Thread starter SeymourCake
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
LiveFreeX
Banned
Hands down.
CuddleJunkie
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2015
- Messages
- 769
- Reaction score
- 565
- Age
- 33
Another vote for Trump. But bear in mind I know nothing about US presidents lol.
SeymourCake
Banned
- Joined
- Apr 9, 2010
- Messages
- 1,523
- Reaction score
- 363
Trump isn't in office yet lol
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
CuddleJunkie
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2015
- Messages
- 769
- Reaction score
- 565
- Age
- 33
He's the president of my heart bro. No homo.
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
Ronaldo7
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2013
- Messages
- 802
- Reaction score
- 177
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
Theodore Roosevelt. An inspiration to men everywhere. He was a sickly, timid child who overcame his weaknesses and rose to the presidency.
Second would be Ronald Reagan, although it's a shame that in his second term he really became senile.
Second would be Ronald Reagan, although it's a shame that in his second term he really became senile.
YawataNoKami
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 10, 2013
- Messages
- 821
- Reaction score
- 306
Teddy Roosevelt
Harry Truman
Andrew Jackson
Harry Truman
Andrew Jackson
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
backbreaker
Master Don Juan
james polk