Father Issues

[search1ng]

Hey guys,

Just hoping i could get a broader insight into this small problem i have.
My dad calls me like 2-3 times a day. Over really small mundane sh1t. I give him an update and then he'll call again 2 hours or so later and ask again. It frustrates the hell out of me.

Couldn't take much more of it and today i just told him to stop calling so damned much over the smallest sh1t and he says he just wants to talk to his son, etc. Look, i understand, he misses me, etc. But it gets really annoying when he calls and asks the same things, asks if I've completed errands etc. I've asked him to call in moderation and he says i never call, that's why he calls me so often.

It's just really frustrating. I understand that he wants to talk to me, etc. But honestly, not a lot changes in 2-3 hours or a day. I guess he's looking for deep father to son conversations but, that sh1t isn't going to happen if he calls so bloody often. All this serves to do is increase the tension i feel whenever i see his name pop up on the phone.

So, is this something i need to view from a different angle? He's my father, but these calls only serve to increase the tension. Hell, 7/10 we'll end the phone having an argument.

Fcking need to punch something in the face now.

 

[Desdinova]

I get the same thing from my dad. I just ignore the phone a lot when he calls. If he asks where I've been, I just give him a vague answer like "I've been busy doing this and that." I've realized that with some family, you need to find a good balance, so I talk to him once in a while to make him happy but ignore him a lot to keep myself sane.

You just can't change some people, and you can't completely kick them out of your life either.

 

[Ken785]

Come on man. You only get one life, and you only get one Dad. You better love them and make it the best relationship you can and not take it for granted because you never know when it will be gone forever.

 

[Alle_Gory]

Just ignore him for a year or so. Worked with my old man. Now he leaves me alone instead of pestering me five times a day over stupid sh*t. I got the same bullsh*t. He just wants to "talk" to me. Only problem is that besides telling me what to do, and ripping on me when I make the tiniest mistake, there isn't any "talk".

Ugh.

AFCs. There's not much you can do, but control your emotions and your exposure to them.

 

[search1ng]

Just ignore him for a year or so. Worked with my old man. Now he leaves me alone instead of pestering me five times a day over stupid sh*t. I got the same bullsh*t. He just wants to "talk" to me. Only problem is that besides telling me what to do, and ripping on me when I make the tiniest mistake, there isn't any "talk".

Ugh.

AFCs. There's not much you can do, but control your emotions and your exposure to them.

Holy sh1t man, similar situation right here. Except, like the guy above said, one life, only dad, he's family etc. I just want it to cut down the # of phone-calls down, everything in moderation!

fcking pain in the brain man. Too much thinking over this sh1t.

 

[mpimpin]

I've had the opposite problem for the last fifteen years. Can't ever get ahold of mine he's always running around with one of his hoes

 

[backbreaker]

just becuase someone is family doesn't mean they are a good fit in your life. I'm sorry. that's not a popular viewpoint but I had waded against the waves for too long trying to fit my parents in y life. both of them are ****ed up. my mom is a religious nut who hates my fiancee because she's white and won't see her grandson becuase of it. my dad tried to fvck my last real GF..twice. then turned around and asked for money for a dp on a car.

both of them can go to hell.

I say that to say... there is no law stating you have tot alk to your dad. cut him off.

if he comes around he comes around. if my parents change i'll be more than happy to have them in mylife.

alot of people's low self esteem comes from horrible parents who do **** liket ell you that you are a loswer when you want to start a business instead of go to school, tell you that you won't amount to ****, this and that.

 

[Energizer]

I seldom talk to my father, he never really took an interest in my life when growing up, so I'm not taking an interest in him anymore and haven't done so for a few years now.