False Friend zone

[DonJuanit0]

Today I was thinking, as I was talking to a "female friend" of mine, that there is a zone that has never been discussed here or at least I haven't seen it!

There is this zone that someone might think that is friend zone but in reality it isn't! What I mean?

I mean that both of the people involved in this "friendship" actually like each other but acting like normal friends! They actually both try to hide it, try to act normal in front of others/or when alone with each other, but there are some little things that prove that she/he likes the other person! Little things that few would recognise them as IOIs!

Now, since I believe there is this kind of zone (false friend zone) there are some Questions!

What are the IOIs in this situation? Most of them are pretty much the same as any IOI would be BUT most of them may also be things that a normal friend would say! I guess gealously would be an IOI but it can easily stay hidden! Lf more suggestions...

How can someone escape from this false friend zone and either ruin his friendship or find a new fb/LTR material!!

That's pretty much what I was thinking and I wanted to share with you guys...

Discuss..

 

[Dukester101]

I just met a girl out here in the desert (she's no "desert queen" by any means) actually.

We hang out everyday after work out here. I know, under normal circumstances this would not happen, but out here in Iraq, there's nothing to fvcking do. We go running about 2 miles every night, then hit the gym.

Our relationship started off platonic, but somewhere it turned into more. If you were to see us, you'd say we're just friends, but when we're alone, there's more involved.

It's probably just a desert fling for the both of us... but still, we look like we're in the FZ, but we're not. Not to mention, I'm in the process of a divorce and she's heading back to the US soon.

I guess... friends with benefits!

 

[Maxtro]

False friendzone? Bullshit

I mean that both of the people involved in this "friendship" actually like each other but acting like normal friends! They actually both try to hide it, try to act normal in front of others/or when alone with each other

If the people aren't intimate even when they are alone, that's the friendzone.

 

[SBW]

I can think of a woman I know who was in this position with a colleague (both single). The chemistry/body language/banter between them was electric and even the boss/other colleagues were rooting for them to get together but they both steadfastly maintained they were just friends.

TBH, if they both didn't have differing career issues/ambitions to contend with, I think they might have got together as one time, she did tell me how much he could turn her on, despite his not being her "type" (he is a small plump beardy guy)

Anyway, what blew it was this - She and another female colleague got into a fairly graphic discussion about their favourite sex toys, without realising he was rooting about in the cupboards under the counter they were standing at the other side of. Apparently the look on his face as he emerged was an absolute picture. He clearly couldn't cope with this and since then, he can barely look her in the eye.

And the place I work is pretty notorious for couples getting together but doing their very best to avoid it becoming known. "Just friends" has often turned out to be something quite different when you meet them off-site.

 

[OFWHAP]

Just because you're friends with a girl doesn't mean you're automatically in the friend zone. The friend zone is for guys whom a girl would never date, but she'll be friends with them at least. If a girl thinks you're a guy she would date, you're not in the friend zone.

 

[DavenJuan]

"FALSE FRIEND ZONE"... is the very reason why some men fall into the real "friendzone" at some point.

MISSED OPPORTUNITIES

IMO, there is no reason why a man should be sitting back not doing anything when he wants something, playing friends when he really wants more.

would we agree this lack of action unattractive?

would we agree that its a passive mindset?

these are traits that put you in the friendzone

 

[Igetit!]

Just because you're friends with a girl doesn't mean you're automatically in the friend zone.

BINGO.


As weird as it may seem,you can actually be friends with a girl and not be in the friendzone.


As long as you're a MAN and exhibit manly/masculine behavior,you should be clear of the friendzone,,,,even if you don't show a direct sexual interest in the girl.



What that means is that if you happen to be around the girl,and she starts trying to speak and connect to you like one of her girlfriend (like trying to gossip and talk about other guys),you continue to behave like you're hanging out with your guy friends.


Burp,fart,talk about a chick with big boob,talk about sports,etc.



Women don't do that. Try as she might,she won't be able to connect with you on that "girlfriend" level,nor will she be able to connect with you on your male,masculine guy level as well.


With those two aspects eliminated,ALL THAT'S LEFT to connect on is the sexual level. You're already displaying typical male behavior and attributes.




I understand what DonJuanit0 means. It's usually when both a guy and a girl like each other,both are afraid to make a move,so that end up acting like friends.



That way they can be close to one another while at the same time not have to risk being rejected.



The only problem with that is if it goes on too long,this "false friendzone" will turn into the real one if SOMEBODY doesn't do something eventually.




And it usually changes for the girl first because the guy will keep hanging around her,drop his masculinity,and start connecting with her on her "girlfriend" level.



That's when it's over with.

The friend zone is for guys whom a girl would never date, but she'll be friends with them at least.

Right.

If a girl thinks you're a guy she would date, you're not in the friend zone.

Exactly.

 

[DonJuanit0]

"FALSE FRIEND ZONE"... is the very reason why some men fall into the real "friendzone" at some point.

MISSED OPPORTUNITIES

IMO, there is no reason why a man should be sitting back not doing anything when he wants something, playing friends when he really wants more.

would we agree this lack of action unattractive?

would we agree that its a passive mindset?

these are traits that put you in the friendzone

I'm not talking about sitting back and drop yourself in the friendzone!
I'm talking about having a girl that you were meant to be friends! for example you are in the same group of friends, but later on you discover that there's more cause you're not actual friends! You just hang out together! No one is sitting back! You might know a girl for a long time and people, even you, may consider that you are just friends! But then you see some strange IOIs! That's what I mean False friend zone! I think Igetit pretty much explained what I'm talking about...

 

[OFWHAP]

I'm not talking about sitting back and drop yourself in the friendzone!
I'm talking about having a girl that you were meant to be friends! for example you are in the same group of friends, but later on you discover that there's more cause you're not actual friends! You just hang out together! No one is sitting back! You might know a girl for a long time and people, even you, may consider that you are just friends! But then you see some strange IOIs! That's what I mean False friend zone! I think Igetit pretty much explained what I'm talking about...

No, the friend zone is black and white. You're either in the friend zone or you're not. There is no in between. The girl keeps hanging around in hopes that the guy will grow some balls and make a move on her. If the guy doesn't make a move, she'll lose interest and relegate him to the friend zone.

 

[ArcBound]

No, the friend zone is black and white. You're either in the friend zone or you're not. There is no in between. The girl keeps hanging around in hopes that the guy will grow some balls and make a move on her. If the guy doesn't make a move, she'll lose interest and relegate him to the friend zone.

While this is true I've had a girl who waited 6 months to date me. However "in between" actually is when the interest level steadily drops slowly over time or somehow stays constant until a force spurs one of the two into action. OP if you are in this position there is no need to analyze it, just make a move and you should be fine if she really is interested in you. Which you should be assuming in any case.

 

[DonJuanit0]

While this is true I've had a girl who waited 6 months to date me. However "in between" actually is when the interest level steadily drops slowly over time or somehow stays constant until a force spurs one of the two into action. OP if you are in this position there is no need to analyze it, just make a move and you should be fine if she really is interested in you. Which you should be assuming in any case.

Seriously, I am not! I'm in a very good LTR right now! I just thought of it and it would be a nice matter to be discussed here!

No, the friend zone is black and white. You're either in the friend zone or you're not. There is no in between. The girl keeps hanging around in hopes that the guy will grow some balls and make a move on her. If the guy doesn't make a move, she'll lose interest and relegate him to the friend zone.

I'm NOT talking about friend zone! Forget about friend zone! What if I call it INTETIONALLY NOT SHOWING INTEREST THOUGH HANGING OUT TOGETHER ZONE? Will it make you understand what I'm talking about?

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

Well you guys have identified it, no need to nerd this up any further.

A Don Juan's gut knows the difference.

Step 2 is to TAKE ACTION with her, when you are feeling each other out.

 

[nismo-4]

Take action and you have a better chance of avoiding the friendzone.

Port Friendzone, Louisiana,
Friend Head Island, South Carolina
Friendzone Lake, Utah

There is no false friendzone. That's an oxymoron. It's just hard as hell to get out of it.

 

[OFWHAP]

Seriously, I am not! I'm in a very good LTR right now! I just thought of it and it would be a nice matter to be discussed here!



I'm NOT talking about friend zone! Forget about friend zone! What if I call it INTETIONALLY NOT SHOWING INTEREST THOUGH HANGING OUT TOGETHER ZONE? Will it make you understand what I'm talking about?

What you're talking about is a guy and girl who are unable to cut through the sexual tension that exists between them. It's not that I didn't understand what you were talking about, it's more that I dislike the term "False Friend Zone."