"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

False confidence.

LostAndConfused

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 22, 2007
Messages
1,137
Reaction score
11
While I get dressed to go out on a date I notice something. Putting on my favorite pair of affliction jeans and my favorite graphic t-shirt which I saved up for, I notice my confidence boosts with my clothing.

Isn't something wrong with this?

Now this false confidence only boosts when my date complements me on my clothing.

But the next day, no matter how well the date went, my confidence goes back down to its usual, fairly low level.

i dont htink my clothing should determine how much confidence i have. anyone experience similar boosts of confidence when they dress well?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Daddy The Pimp

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2007
Messages
1,642
Reaction score
50
Location
Cave
LostAndConfused said:
While I get dressed to go out on a date I notice something. Putting on my favorite pair of affliction jeans and my favorite graphic t-shirt which I saved up for, I notice my confidence boosts with my clothing.

Isn't something wrong with this?

Now this false confidence only boosts when my date complements me on my clothing.

But the next day, no matter how well the date went, my confidence goes back down to its usual, fairly low level.

i dont htink my clothing should determine how much confidence i have. anyone experience similar boosts of confidence when they dress well?
There are a lot of things that determine your confidence . Clothing is on that list to . WHY ?

Because , when you dress good , you feel more beautiful . When you have nice body , you will be the king of the beach . When you do a crazy new hairstyle youll feel like a star . And its nice , to find things like these , that boosts your confidence and use them on your advantage , work on them and get that confidence .
 

Crazy Asian

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 29, 2007
Messages
1,060
Reaction score
9
Age
34
i find that having a positive outlook on life gives me a higher level of confidence overall. Sure i get that little "boost" when i dress nicely or just got out of swim practice, but i believe that our confidence level grows as we experience new things in life and as we become less afraid of what we don't know. Have a purpose, know that everything will be alright because you trust yourself. If something fails, so what, it's not the end.

That's what I think.
 

Teh_Wolf

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 20, 2008
Messages
99
Reaction score
1
yeah but isnt it somewhat bad to depend on boosts from things like that. like i know tyler from rsd (or it mighta been natural tim) said that he wanted to work on doing well without depending on things like that, so he would dress badly on purpose to help develope his core confidence. That way he would never have to worry how he looked to feel great ect.
 

SinJester

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 1, 2007
Messages
1,226
Reaction score
44
Location
Australia
It's normal to feel better when you are dressed well. It's just conditioning by society. Ideally you should be able to hold that level of confidence all the time. Like Teh Wolf said. But hey there's nothing wrong with feeling good when you are dressed well! Enjoy it. Just work on being confident ALL THE TIME.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

TakenDirectly

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 31, 2008
Messages
54
Reaction score
2
It's weird, but I have a pretty bad habit of doing this too. If I put on a shirt that I feel makes me look chubby then I definitely do not feel as confident when I wear something that is more fitting. Appearance only affects your confidence because you feel more accepted when you look better. Not necessarily "accepted" so much as you feel that less/no people will think/look at you negatively. It's not a BAD thing to care about your appearance, but in my opinion the more you build up that good feeling of "looking good" the less and less picky you will be over what you wear. Of course, you won't go out in a garbage bag, but you will be able to put on a shirt or jeans that aren't the best and still be able to say "hey, I look good". Just my 2 cents.
 
Top