Falling into the trap

[Haboob]

Warning long post and life story ahead...



One year ago I was having serious doubts about myself and I felt very insecure when it came to the ladies. I posted on other relationship forums again and again listing every little detail that was all based around "does she like me?". But no one ever gave me a useful reply. Thankfully I stumbled on this great site.

(Look at the time I joined)

This site saved me from the many years of being a 'nice guy' that I otherwise would have had to endure. My attitude changed, my confidence increased and I vowed to improve myself. I took up a new sport and started learning guitar, thus finding two new passions.

I managed to get over the girl I had fallen for and learnt there was more to life. I also said to myself that I would get buff, but that didn't work out and its hard when you are 14...


So I lived happily for a while but I never managed to break into the social life I desired...

Anyway it all was going good. Although I had never had the balls to ask a girl out (yet) I had made many improvements. "Your not quiet any more", which is an exact quote from a girl in my class. Although I hadn't been out with anyone I was now far more confident around women. (Until she called me annoying then I decided to back of a bit )

But then the season finished and I had to sport to occupy myself...

Anyway then there was this new chick... It all started again. I started to think "does she like me?" again. But then I thought '**** I've fallen into it again! What about all that stuff I learnt?'

...I was falling into the trap again.

So now I'm stuck with the same old dilemma... I like this chick but still I've got no balls or social status. I just can't work myself up to just rock up at a party. I know hardly anyone, and my friends don't offer much help at all because they are to 'cool' for me and would rather not be seen with me.

I'm slowly coming better again, and school ends in a week and a bit. Might as well use it then. There's plenty of holidays to heal in provided anything goes wrong

I always say 'I will do it eventually' because I'm still a self-improving work in progress. But if I always say that nothing ever going to happen.

So any advice on:

1. How to crack into the social food chain and end up near the top..? Or at least getting out.
2. What to do about this chick. How to 'ask out' when its High School...
3. Anything I said in general.
4. Life in general.


Thanks guys I know it's a long post.

 

[AC/DC]

Ok. Make a list of things you want to do for YOURSELF only.

Maybe the car you want to get, or what you want for it. Maybe a new video game system or something similarly stupid. Maybe is a pocket full of cash.

Go out and do it. That is now your ultimate priority. Making friends and connections to provide a basis for the rest of your life is your next priority. You will work tirelessly to achieve your goals.

You will be outspoken about what you think at the proper time. You will NOT talk often to people you barely know.

What's your name? John maybe? You're big f*ckin John Dogg now. No one wants to cross your path. People talk ****, tell them to go mind their own business. You are your priority, and make your dreams come true.

 

[Taviii]

Originally posted by Haboob

I know hardly anyone, and my friends don't offer much help at all because they are to 'cool' for me and would rather not be seen with me.

They are not your friends if they act like that!

Youd better get a lot of ***** and make them jealous about it

 

[Haboob]

Ok. Make a list of things you want to do for YOURSELF only.

Maybe the car you want to get, or what you want for it. Maybe a new video game system or something similarly stupid. Maybe is a pocket full of cash.

Go out and do it. That is now your ultimate priority. Making friends and connections to provide a basis for the rest of your life is your next priority. You will work tirelessly to achieve your goals.

You will be outspoken about what you think at the proper time. You will NOT talk often to people you barely know.

What's your name? John maybe? You're big f*ckin John Dogg now. No one wants to cross your path. People talk ****, tell them to go mind their own business. You are your priority, and make your dreams come true.

One problem, it's a bit hard to get a car when you are 14 (OK almost 15)

I think you got that bit mixed up too. Shouldn't I NOT be outspoken and talk OFTEN to people I barely know?

Oh and Tavii not all my friends are like that just 1 or 2. Only they are good friends most of the time apart from when it comes to large crowds. But hopefully I will be able to make 'em jealous soon!

 

[Haboob]

This happen to anyone else? Anyone else with advicve.

I'm getting over it now I jsu wnated to give this one final bump.

 

[Distant Light]

Basically your trying to get a social life. Well first in order to do this your inner game has to be reworked. If i could have found exactly where i read a post that changed me i would have posted it but i can't remember.

But basically don't care about things. Either way when you die all this stuff was done and now its over. So stop caring about stuff. Act like this whole thing is a game and your just here to have fun. (Wish i knew the link to the post)

Anyway my say is go to alot of parties. If you live in the city is easier cause there are alot of flyers and teen parties. If you don't want to go that route. Then go sarging looking for girls and just make them hangout with you as you game them and also would be good to get some hot girl "friends". You will gain access to probably cool guys to hang out with and access to getting to know more people. Soon enough you could end up with 20 friends who are calling you alot to come hangout.

 

[Haboob]

I've kind of wanted to get out more for some time.

Only thing is I've never actually had the balls to do it. You see I become rather quiet in large groups for some reason. I've only been out in a large group once before. I know. Just not a fan of large crowds...

There's to friends I could perhaps go with but I doubt they would want me to go with them because they don't exactly view me as 'cool'.

I suppose the only way though is to grab my balls and rock up with one of them...