"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Failed with initial nervousness, any tips on recovery before this fades away?

holdbiu

New Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2012
Messages
2
Reaction score
0
The back story isn't really important. She was into me due to years of myself building up respect and never giving her the slightest interest (and me dating other girls). We work together. She made this very clear she was into me (but not so clear that my method of thinking a month ago could be certain, but the signs were there).

We spoke a few times, joked, she would go out of her way to joking with me. It came to a boiling point when we got the oppertunity to hang out outside by pure chance, I blew it, didn't escalate and moved to escape out of being a pure wuss.

Following this I took 2 weeks to regroup and I made a move, I got her phone number with the intention of asking her out, she gave it to me without worry. However I texted her a few times and didn't get to the point, she ignored two messages in a row which were pretty clear, and we once again fell into silence for 2 weeks.

Now since then she will intiiate conversation with me very friendlyish, she also always looks to see if i'm looking at her. But I have shown clear fear and that is the problem. Most of my above actions have been done with quite alot of nervousness and lack of confidence and I destroyed what I spent 2 years (unknowingly) building. She could tell I was super nervous too.

The thing is, she still seems somewhat interested, she goes out of her way to speak to me, she still always looks at me to see if i'm looking at her... But i'm not sure what I can do to get anywhere. I've had a few conversations with her and whenever I joke or tease her she responds with very positive emotions.

Lurking this forum has taught me absurd amounts and every time I have contact with her i'm getting better and better at doing what I used to do naturally (oh the irony). How would you guys proceed?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

FairShake

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 8, 2008
Messages
2,405
Reaction score
306
Nervousness shouldn't be a barrier to either you trying for the azz or her giving it up (if her interest level is high).

Don't let it be a barrier and give it at least one more shot. You have absolutely nothing to lose.
 

Super Hero

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 30, 2011
Messages
59
Reaction score
7
Location
mind
I want you to try this, cuz it works on
some weird level I don't understand.

Just start seeing yourself as a guy who is
always around hot women, and is super
comfortable, and super cool in the craziest
situations.

Wake up every day, and think about how
great you are, and all of the possibilities
that await you.


This girl walked up to me today and said "I hate
it because I can;t **** my guy friends, because
everyone will think I'm a slut."

"Well, it's a good thing we're not friends then"

Lol. OK, enough. Just give this mindset a go,
and get back to me with the results.
Try different things, find new "pockets" of girls around
your city or town, etc.
 
Top