"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Facebook: what to do when a girl you once liked writes on your wall?

alpha_ash

Senior Don Juan
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Now first of all, I no longer add girls to fb nor do I even use facebook. Back in the day, when I was total AFC, I asked out a girl and she apologetically declined. I was into her for the restocks the year, but then went no contact for over a year while she was studying abroad in Japan. When she came back I didn't give her the same attention and a few months later she wrote directly on my wall, not even a private message, that she misses me and all the good times, WHILE HAVINGA BOYFRIEND.

I left it on my wall for a week for some laughs, then deleted it. Did I respond properly? I suppose this thread could be useful for the guys still in college and using Facebook.

Since I never deleted her from fb, she still has access to part of mine even though privacy settings are set to very high. One of my friends from college commented on a huge group pic from my room, she and I were sitting right next to each other. She responds, "I miss you guys."

Now I'm thinking to myself, ****ing **** loll. She still has a boyfriend and is ****ing around on fb with pics of other men (and there were several other girls in the pic) but the only reason she knew most of them was through me.

PS: I haven't contacted her in 2+ yeArs, nor have I accessed her profile during that period. Only know from news feed/friend telling me.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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PlayHer Man

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Unless you are still trying to bang her or date her.. who cares about the "proper response"?

I actually would of just left her post on my wall so other girls can see it.
 

NewAndImproved

Senior Don Juan
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You shouldn't have deleted the wall post. Doing so suggests that you care. No action is the best action.

But come on man a facebook wall post saying she "misses you". So what?! For some reason you think it's a big deal that she would write this publicly, all the while having a boyfriend.

If anything, it's the exact opposite. Things would be more promising if she sent this in a PM -- PRIVATELY -- but she's airing it publicly because there's nothing to hide. There's nothing sexual or romantic here.
 
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