"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Facebook meeting went well but now something has gone wrong.

pete101

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met this HB off facebook last week and things went really well she seemed to be really into me IOIs everything, we speculatively arranged to meet today but possibly 2 days ago (but she couldn't say yes for sure as she may need to see an old friend) but offered me today or tomorrow instead.

i called her on friday to see if we were meeting that night but found out she had plans with the old friend so we agreed for today but didn't confirm the definite time. during the phone convo i was very nervous and may have come across very needy and desperate.. i was panicing because i found out that her best friend and her sister i had previously been speaking to on facebook and arranged to meet her best friend previously but it never worked out scheduling wise.

what i did after the date was block all 3 girls so there would be no photo trail of me and thankfully when i used to speak to her best friend a month ago i had a slightly different name..

the thing is that when i called her best friend still wasn't back in the country so she was clueless but i knew that if they talked i'd get busted as i spoke their language (their foreign) and it seems a little obvious and coincidental that this same guy did..

anyway i was in a rush which added to the nervousness of ending the call that i did not finalise definite plans for today and said i'd call back later when my offpeak mins would come in. somewhere along the line she told me she did not have credit and i suggested i would call and keep calling till i got through to her since i did not have my facebook anymore and she had no credit..

i refrained from calling her until yesterday to which i encountered a major problem in that her area she loses phone reception quite easily and when i called it would say 'network busy', the thing is.. i do not know if it sends a text message to her phone saying i've called each time there is no reception so if it does in total i called 5 times of which only 2 actually went through and rang. i also left her a text in between saying i had to cut our call short yesterday and that she should miss call me once and i'd call her back if she has no credit and that i'd call her later that day.

she didn't respond.

fast forward to today i attempt to call again but this time no network probs and it rings but she doesn't pick up.. so i text her asking if we're meeting tonight as planned?

i know she doesn't have any credit on her phone but it doesn't mean i should have carte blanche to call her like 5 times just cos i said i would and she agreed right?

this made me uncomfortable so i called again about an hour later cos i needed to know an answer there and then but she didn't answer and i left a voicemail saying i understood she did not have credit so couldn't call back and i told her i made a new facebook account so she should reply to me there now..

i sent the same thing in a text after as i assumed if she didn't have credit she wouldn't be able to check her voicemail anyway.. i was really panicing at this stage.

i couldn't tell if she was just ignoring me or not so i tried an experiment of calling her from the house phone and also from a different mobile number.. al of which none were answered.. so it appeared she was not picking up any calls.. i dont know if that's a sign that she may not be ignoring me but im still baffled as to why since our positive call on friday she's now flaking??

can anyone shed light as to what happened from friday onwards?

i understand that my indiscretions today have severely come across needy and desperate but that does not explain why she did not answer my calls yesterday or my text...

i had a valid reason to confirm our meeting today and i just dont know what went wrong and i want answers..
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Rhoto

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Aye Eff See.

Look how emotionally invested you are in some chick you met on the web. Why?
 

pete101

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Im in a rut at the moment and have no other options.. and it's just unfortunate that she happened to come along in my weak moments. i tried this weekend to spin more plates but all unsuccessful approaches so it's kind of like she's my back up..

plus we got on really well..

i've been having a bad few months women wise and it was a bit of a shock for me that a date went so well that i do feel a little needy and desperate rather than keep a level head.
 

Rhoto

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Ok, so you were in a vulnerable position and you scared some one away.

Now what?

You called her 3 times to confirm a date. You tried to be tricky and call from a different phone, (whom she still probably thought was you). Would you want to hang out with a chick that did that to you?

I can relate to your "rut" but thinking you have no other options is the problem.

You can't think you have no other options. Because the longer you keep believing that, the more and more its going be.

Get yourself mentally together man. I suggest reading DJ Bible, its available at the bottom of the page.
 

pete101

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i haven't got a clue where it went wrong since friday?

obviously today i was over the top
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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