F*cked-up bad-habit state of mind...

[squirrels]

You know, when I first met Shelby, I thought she was the ONE, that she was the best I'd ever be able to attract, and it broke my heart when she lost interest, until I hooked up with Lindy on her living room floor...I thought I was at the peak of my game until I met Carmen and Renee. I later thought that they were the last I'd see of "good women", that I screwed up by not calling them, until I met Angie. When we were making out on her living room floor, I thought she was the ONE...that I couldn't do better than this and I'd better hang on to her, until I met Nikki. When Amanda didn't return my call the second night, I thought that I had lost the finest-looking girl I could ever attract until Sarah showed up in that cute little mini-skirt (which came off later that night), at which point I thought, "This is it...I don't think I'll EVER do any better." Then I met Lindsay. And right now I'm so worried that she dropped me off her MySpace friend-list on Sunday even though she was sucking me off Thursday and talking about how much she wanted to ride my c*ck on Saturday.

Why is it so hard for me to get it out of my head that attractive women are NOT the rare and irreplaceable good that I make them out to be? I seem to be the one holding ALL of the cards here, yet somehow I'm always falling into the bad habit of getting bent out of shape when chicks pass in and out of my life.

Fvcking ego. In all honesty, I'd rather spend time with the cute redhead I'm seeing now behind her soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend's back...she's maybe a 7.5 to Amanda's and Sarah's and Lindsay's 9...but I can hold a CONVERSATION with her without feeling like I'm talking to one of those interactive conversation websites.

Fvck it, I don't even need HER, either. I sit and laugh at her sh!t-tests, the way her boyfriend caves like a snivelling b!tch under them and they bounce off of me like nothing...fvck, the more I do this, the more it seems like a joke that I and other people used to believe it was so damn hard. Yet I can't stop taking it seriously.

I'm getting all bent out of shape because my ego can't stand the idea that women don't worship me, don't consider me the best thing going in their lives and don't beg to spend more time with me. I'm sitting here thinking, "WHAT AM I DOING WRONG??" Did I do ANYTHING "wrong"? Probably not.

Stay out of the bad habit of judging your self-worth by how much women desire you. I dunno about you, but I'm having a difficult time handling the ego-swings. It makes it hard for me to think sometimes.

Beautiful women are a dime a dozen. And pimpin' is only hard if you believe it is. I'm willing to believe that there are a lot of guys on this forum who do better than 90% of the male population out there, but still look at themselves as chumps, the way I do. WHY?? Why do we punish ourselves over what some fickle girl who's slave to her emotional swings thinks of us?

Fix your own life. Fvck women...get a job, start a business, make some money. Buy a nice house, a fast car, travel, play some sports, have some adventures. And take women one day at a time...let them decide whether THEY are good enough to stand with YOU. You'd be surprised how many of the women you thought left you because you weren't good enough...left you because you were TOO good and they thought you looked down on THEM.

God, life is too short for this bullsh!t. :crazy: I need a vacation.

 

[crotchrocket]

Well squirrels - you saved me the trouble of posting - cuz what you've written is EXACTLY what I've been thinking lately too.
Once again - after a so-called relationship ends, I start thinking these things.

And to make things worse I look back on things (the girl, her personality ... etc.) and wonder "what the he11 was I thinking? ... she was hot yeah! ... but that's about it !"

It's a recurring self-inflicted mind-set, that affects these relationships long before they end.

 

[kyphan]

It is interesting that we beat ourselves up over the little things without looking at the big picture.

My last gf, I thought she was the one worth settling down over. She proved me wrong and only had half a clue that I was ready to drop her and simply move on with my life. She was probably a 6 on her best day, but a 6 is the best I'd ever had. Then I somehow go out with a few 8's and actually kissed one - suddenly my LTR standards went through the roof! It's weird looking at girls I would have begged the Don Juan Lord Almighty for a shot with and thinking, "Meh, she's cute but nothing I'd want for more than a fling."

We have to remember to never sell ourselves short, and the best we can do is beyond our imagination.

 

[ER!C L!VE]

I hear ya bro. I haven't felt that way about ordinary girls I bang, but I feel let down when a pseudo-celebrity girl isn't all over me. (yes, I'm that arrogant to think pseudo-celebs want me). For example, last weekend at the AVN awards I was butt hurt for a minute after A*riel Re*bel was chatting with me, she was playing with my necklace, things we're going smooth, I was neg hitting on her about getting lipo-suction (she's like 80lbs, lol) we were clicking, another pseudo celeb came up and chatted with us both, she still kept chatting with me. Then, she answered her phone in the middle of the conversation and walked away...

My ego did get take a little blow...but I was on blow, so I wasn't feeling that bad. Anyway... trying to comprehend why she didn't want to bang me was a thought that was running through my head - "what the fcuk? why doesn't she just start making out with me?". ... I still think I have a chance because she hasn't outright said, "NO". lol However, she emailed me on myspace a few days later, so my ego is back up.

Dude, I'm not made of steel either. I get going on the ego roller coaster too.
:cheer:

 

[squirrels]

I hear ya bro. I haven't felt that way about ordinary girls I bang, but I feel let down when a pseudo-celebrity girl isn't all over me. (yes, I'm that arrogant to think pseudo-celebs want me). For example, last weekend at the AVN awards I was butt hurt for a minute after A*riel Re*bel was chatting with me, she was playing with my necklace, things we're going smooth, I was neg hitting on her about getting lipo-suction (she's like 80lbs, lol) we were clicking, another pseudo celeb came up and chatted with us both, she still kept chatting with me. Then, she answered her phone in the middle of the conversation and walked away...

My ego did get take a little blow...but I was on blow, so I wasn't feeling that bad. Anyway... trying to comprehend why she didn't want to bang me was a thought that was running through my head - "what the fcuk? why doesn't she just start making out with me?". ... I still think I have a chance because she hasn't outright said, "NO". lol However, she emailed me on myspace a few days later, so my ego is back up.

Dude, I'm not made of steel either. I get going on the ego roller coaster too.
:cheer:

Yeah, I'm under the same kind of circumstances. Chick sent me an IM last night, after all this goofy BS. I'm trying to figure out if I'm doing a mis-read, whether it's worth trying to hit her up again.

Or whether I should just take my losses and settle for the Miss Maryland contestant who just started sending me messages. Life is hard.

I miss the days when I could be happy just going out picking up semi-attractive women and not messing around trying to figure out the fickle behavior of self-proclaimed beauty queens.

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Whenever a man spends more than 60 seconds trying to "figure out" the romantic intentions of ANY woman, he is TOO emotionally invested in both HER, and the outcome.

As difficult as it is, we ALL know that the best course of action in this scenario is to withdraw our emotional investment, SELF-evaluate, and THEN focus on OTHER things----be they goals, pet projects, or OTHER women.

Once we successfully RETREAT, we regain our objectivity and RE-build up our IMMUNITY to THAT particular woman. This, soldiers, provides us with a vantage point from which we can make better decisions-----Because we have now climbed ABOVE the waves of our ever-tossing emotions that are stirred up by our chronic desire for sexual gratification.



March on.

 

[RedPill]

Whenever a man spends more than 60 seconds trying to "figure out" the romantic intentions of ANY woman, he is TOO emotionally invested in both HER, and the outcome.

As difficult as it is, we ALL know that the best course of action in this scenario is to withdraw our emotional investment, SELF-evaluate, and THEN focus on OTHER things----be they goals, pet projects, or OTHER women.

Once we successfully RETREAT, we regain our objectivity and RE-build up our IMMUNITY to THAT particular woman. This, soldiers, provides us with a vantage point from which we can make better decisions-----Because we have now climbed ABOVE the waves of our ever-tossing emotions that are stirred up by our chronic desire for sexual gratification.

Victory, you've been on a roll lately man. Great post.

 

[disfunktional]

Why is it so hard for me to get it out of my head that attractive women are NOT the rare and irreplaceable good that I make them out to be?

You know, I've been scanning around recently during my day just to see how many women I would say I'm actually attracted to, and it's really not that many. I'd be lucky if I saw 1 a day - and I would definately not say my standards are too high. I work in an office of about 500 people, and I would say there are two 8's and thats about it.

It seems that around here women I'd class 7 - 8 are pretty rare and 9 - 10's are almost non-existant! But on a recent trip to New York I was astounded by the amount of attractive women that I would pass just on the streets - 9 -10's all over the place. Also I went to San Diego last year and I wouldn't say that was much worse. I don't know why but you guys seem to have generally more attractive women over there - just my observation.

df

 

[squirrels]

You know, I've been scanning around recently during my day just to see how many women I would say I'm actually attracted to, and it's really not that many. I'd be lucky if I saw 1 a day - and I would definately not say my standards are too high. I work in an office of about 500 people, and I would say there are two 8's and thats about it.

It seems that around here women I'd class 7 - 8 are pretty rare and 9 - 10's are almost non-existant! But on a recent trip to New York I was astounded by the amount of attractive women that I would pass just on the streets - 9 -10's all over the place. Also I went to San Diego last year and I wouldn't say that was much worse. I don't know why but you guys seem to have generally more attractive women over there - just my observation.

df

That's because over here in America, as soon as we get old enough, we're all trained in the use of a toothbrush.

Sorry...had to.

I was completely taken aback though the last couple nights...just going out and hitting the bars, most of the places I went to had at least 20 women in there who were f*ckable. At LEAST.

 

[azanon]

I'm getting all bent out of shape because my ego can't stand the idea that women don't worship me, don't consider me the best thing going in their lives and don't beg to spend more time with me. I'm sitting here thinking, "WHAT AM I DOING WRONG??" Did I do ANYTHING "wrong"? Probably not.

Stay out of the bad habit of judging your self-worth by how much women desire you. I dunno about you, but I'm having a difficult time handling the ego-swings. It makes it hard for me to think sometimes.

Are you sure (you aren't doing anything wrong)? If i were you, I wouldn't be so quick to assume that its perfectly normal to pull in the babes initially as well as you seem to suggest you do, then invariable have them all run off later. If you're doing the latter part right, you should really be having a problem with having to break it off with them when you're tired of them.

I'm only saying this out of concern because maybe they're seeing you as a one of those types that are fun for the short run. For instance, maybe you're good-looking and have a fun personality but there's no substance there? For us guys, you might possibly be the male equilivant of the type you "f***"? And maybe that's perfectly ok with you since you're a guy, but I know girls hate being thought of that way.

Fix your own life. Fvck women...get a job, start a business, make some money. Buy a nice house, a fast car, travel, play some sports, have some adventures. And take women one day at a time...let them decide whether THEY are good enough to stand with YOU. You'd be surprised how many of the women you thought left you because you weren't good enough...left you because you were TOO good and they thought you looked down on THEM.

God, life is too short for this bullsh!t. :crazy: I need a vacation.

So is this maybe the reason? You dont have a great job, nice house, car, or lots of leisure activities? Sorry, but i'm only asking because if you had all of these things too, then i'd be quite surprised that your real problem isnt instead them all wanting to marry you, instead of them having their fun then leaving. You're 27, so if they're about that age too, usually most of them by then are looking for a keeper and for some reason, they're not perceiving you as one.

So you tell me; why don't they want to stay? I typically have the opposite problem you do; my hard part is getting them initially, but then 3 out of 4 times I have to break their heart later.