"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Eye contact

bob246

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Seriously i find this eye contact thing very hard.

I was trying it the other day while talking to this girl and it just felt so uncomfortable. I mean i completely forgot where the convo was going as i was just concentrating so much on the eye contact thing. I didnt even know what she was saying lol.

I was looking at her eyes for about 3 or 4 seconds and then looking away and then back again. Is that the right way to do it? This is the first time ive tried this eye contact thing and seriously it felt weird.

Usually i just look at the overall face and how their facial expressions are during a convo. Thats what any normal person does.

What i found really difficult was concentrating on the eye contact and convo at the same time?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Skullcrusher

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It's difficult for people that are inferior. When I talk to men, if they look me in the eye and do it naturally - I know they respect me. But those that look away are beneath me.
 

PRMoon

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Eye contact should be a very natural thing. You really sholdn't be afraid of it, to the conturary it's a very valuable tool. I've found that looking a person in the eyes can be a very big confidence booster. When I look a guy in the eyes I give them a look of respect and diplomacy, and 9 times out of 10 they'll tell me I'm a good man even if we haven't spoke too much.

I give a confident but not ****y look to girls when I look them in the eyes and, unless I say something too stupid, I'll get good results/responses from that too. Again I really don't have to say too much when I do it because you form a bond on a more powerful non-verbal level.

At least that's my take on it, I could be way off. But it seems to me that the eyes have it.
 

thefonz

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Try this....

When cops have to interegate suspects for long periods of time they look at their eyebrows so they won't become intimidated by the hostility of the situation.....next time you're talking to a chick (or a dude for that matter) just focus on the persons eyebrows.....as you get better at this try looking at their brows then glancing down into their eyes every so often, then you'll eventually work you're way to complete eye contact
 

Alpine

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Yep,

As some have said, I weaned myself into it gradually, it can be done. I went from not being unable to make eye contact at all to now having no quarms whatsoever with hotties.

Start safe. Practice with friends and family, then graduate to shop assistants, mild aquantances. Build up a tolerance.

Eventually you will progress to gilrz, do it with fatties and uglies, then move up the attractive scale.

What helps is a frame that by making eye contact, you make yourself look ten times more attractive to women and more dominant to men.

It works, just do it.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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tmpgstx

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Eye contact is a mutual thing. You both get a feel for how long to look etc. I can tell a girl is into me (and i'm sure she can too), when our eye contact holds for extended periods of time while talking. Not 3-4 secs, but over a minute with no glancing away etc.! If you're looking at each other in the eyes 75% of the time while talking, there is some mutually assured attraction going on.

Women place HEAVY importance on eye contact with a guy they're interested in. It's more intimate, and shows your interest also. This is where you get "I love the way he looks at me" etc.
 

Marcus

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like a lot of people cant look me in the eye they always end up lookin away a lot or gettin shy and quite.So i dont look them in the eye too much or they get scared or intimidated
:(
 

PRMoon

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Originally posted by Marcus
like a lot of people cant look me in the eye they always end up lookin away a lot or gettin shy and quite.So i dont look them in the eye too much or they get scared or intimidated
:(
What kind of death gaze are you giving people?!:confused:
Expand on this one a little bit more, your demeanor, your appearence, your reputation. I find it very unusual for people to get scared or intimidated just by looking at them casually.
Are you a drill sargent or something?
 
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