Eye Contact

[evolvingnerd]

quick question about EC
i've found that when i hold eye contact i'm really just looking at one of her eyes

is this normal? or is there a way to look at both eyes?
when i'm more than a metre away, there's no real focusing on one eye, but when we're getting a little close and personal i kinda flick between both eyes, like look at one, then the other and then back again...

 

[Fender]

Well, I read this little tip on eye contact. It works for both the problem you have now and for shy people who dont like eye contact.

Basically, when up close, look at the top part of the nose where it 'connects' with the face. (BETWEEN her eyes basically )

To the other person, it'll look like your looking straight into her eye.

luck-

 

[Alpine]

That's a good tip Fender.

Once you get over your sensitivity, I always look at the left eye. Some boffin reckons this is best, brain hemispheres or something.
I can't say it in isolation makes a difference, but who knows and there's nothing to lose.

Also from the Michael Caine acting school. Ever noticed actors in close up whos eyes flit from one two the other. Even some big stars do it, and it's a basic error and loses the intensity.

In conversation use the eye, mouth triangle technique.

 

[sfalexi]

Good tip Fender.

Another one I heard is that you should 'train' yourself to look PAST her up close (as though you're trying to focus on the wall behind her head or even further). Apparently this causes your eyes to dilate a bit, which (if you've ever noticed) means that you like what you see. And apparently she subconsciously is supposed to pick up on this and feel more comfortable seeing big black pupils than tiny dots.

Alexi

 

[crotchrocket]

Shy Salesman

Just like Fender mentioned, you look at the bridge of her nose, my tip on this subject is on this site somewhere and it's called 'The Shy Salesman'.

You can't 'truly' be looking at both her eyes, our eyes don't work independently of each other, so up close you never will be able to, so either do this little trick to make her think you are, or alternate between her eyes, after all there is something about (actually) looking deep into someones eyes, left or right eye doesn't much matter.

 

[Panda 2000]

Don't worry about it so much, because it's likely she's having the same 'problem', so even if you were looking her into both her eyes she wouldn't notice it, because she's looking you in one eye. Haha.

 

[Tweek_1984]

Get your binoculars out when you walk past a hot chick and point them at her eyes.

 

[karusel]

I've read in a book about rhetorics it is best to look at the so called third eye, that is a bit above the eye-nose-eye bridge, think of hindu dot mark. However this does take a bit to get used to. The worst thing you could do is look from one eye to another and back, or wander around the face. The looking at the third eye I think works best because you actually cover both eyes and give the person a certain comforting vibe, which is opposite to looking at the tip of the nose - slightly unpleasant.

 

[bobbob]

jesus h christ ...

 

[spidersense]

Originally posted by evolvingnerd
but when we're getting a little close and personal i kinda flick between both eyes, like look at one, then the other and then back again...

the flicking between the eyes, I've learned that this is a very sexual sign. from my experience(at least from my perception and from other things I've read) looking between the eyes like that is a sign of sexual tension. It's a more obvious sign when you are looking eye, to eye, to eye, to mouth, to nose, to cheek to eye, to eye, to eye, to other cheek, something like that... If you really know this woman, and there is a connection to you that you both believe my become sexual, then do this. If not, then do this very sparingly, meaning that if she doesn't quite feel the same sexual tension that you are she may see you as a horn dog that only wants to get into her pants.

 

[evolvingnerd]

hmmm
this looking inbetween the eyes seems a bit weird
i remember reading that if you look right into a person's pupils, it stirs some internal emotional response
so wouldn't it be better to stare right into one of her eyes, as opposed to not looking directly at either?

 

[BigWillyStyle]

What a sad bunch of fvcks we are, evolvingnerd, you're from the east coast of Oz like me. It's Friday evening and what are we doing, posting crap on a fvcking "getting women" forum about eye contact. Home alone most likely. Like me, but ATM I'm ****ed on oxy so blah... I'm not actually jesus with the ladies at the moment and unemployed again, what's your excuse evolvingnerd? These sad pathetic posts have to end, going out with friends, making moves on girls or just staying home ****ed up on opiates is better then writing **** about "pupil dilation" and "looking girls in just one eye" I've had an epithony right now that people posting on Fri/Sat nights are sad ****s. I'm not excluding myself coz at the moment I AM A SAD PRICK. Once I sort out my habits and get back a shred of self confidence I hope to end this and actually try something useful.