Expressing Anger

[Turncoat]

Is it a good idea, if generally you keep a calm cool-with-everything attitude and a genral cheerful, nice mood, to express anger at your chick if she does something to piss u off? Would that show your "masculinity" more or "insecurity"?

Should i never show she ticked me off or should i show her a dominant anger which is is expressed yet controlled? I ask because expressing anger is a male thing and it'll show masculinity but some dj'ers seem to be against this 'cause they think it shows insecurity (?).

Any of your thoughts and experiences to this would be helpful...

 

[MindOverMatter]

I don't suppress things. If a girl says/does something I know is wrong and I know would piss her off if I said it/did it, then I will put her in her place. If she's acting like a sl*t, I'll let her know. If she's acting without class, I'll let her know. Etc. Don't just sit there and take sh!t because some people on the internet tell you "not to look insecure", that's retarded and will give you an ulcer.

You only show insecurity if you are angry at her when she didn't do anything wrong.

 

[BrotherAP]

You can express anger appropriately, and inappropriately. Many people cannot distinguish between the two, so the advice is given not to express it at all.

You can't lose control. Be cool, calm, funny - and when you get pissed off, stay cool and calm but get very serious, be firm, and say exactly what you're thinking. You're pissed, right? So you don't care what she thinks. Tell her to stop acting like a dumb bytch and don't mince your words. As soon as your point has been made - let it go. Don't be the loser who's got a broomstick up his ass for the rest of the night and feels that he has to announce to the rest of the world that somebody pissed you off - they don't care. It's ok if something bothers you, it just shouldn't bother you that much

 

[n00bPimp]

Originally posted by BrotherAP
You can express anger appropriately, and inappropriately. Many people cannot distinguish between the two, so the advice is given not to express it at all.

You can't lose control. Be cool, calm, funny - and when you get pissed off, stay cool and calm but get very serious, be firm, and say exactly what you're thinking. You're pissed, right? So you don't care what she thinks. Tell her to stop acting like a dumb bytch and don't mince your words. As soon as your point has been made - let it go. Don't be the loser who's got a broomstick up his ass for the rest of the night and feels that he has to announce to the rest of the world that somebody pissed you off - they don't care. It's ok if something bothers you, it just shouldn't bother you that much

Perfect, just summarised what I was going to say.

 

[HeartlessBtch]

just be yourself. if you are not, then its just going to affect you in a negative way. here's when the"i should have donoe something about it when i could" kicks in.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by HeartlessBtch
just be yourself. if you are not, then its just going to affect you in a negative way. here's when the"i should have donoe something about it when i could" kicks in.

This works out really well if you're a pr1ck to start with... No, there's nothing wrong with being angry but the secret is not to loose control. Once you 'just be yourself,' all rational thinking goes out the window and you look like an @ss.

If something makes you angry, voice your discontent. There's no need to raise your voice, to hit anything or do any other thing that shows lack of control. What kind of woman enjoys a guy that flies off the hook and is emotionally volatile? By the way, don't guys call women like that 'b1tches?'

Don't be a b1tch, be a man.

 

[isotope]

yeah this is a good thread because girls often comment that i'm too calm, and how i dont get mad, ever

basically i'm just a stable, strong person and nothing can phase me. but i'm not sure others see it this way.

i think this is a flaw for DJ-ing because some women like a fiery tempered man who can excite them. Like, dont you have to be a little emotional to get HB's to be emotional too?


so i was wondering, should i just intentionally adopt a shorter temper?

should i let my emotions off their leash just a little bit, "for show", so that the girls think i have more 'personality' instead of Mr. Boring?

 

[Maximus_Decimus]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
No, there's nothing wrong with being angry but the secret is not to loose control

...

If something makes you angry, voice your discontent. There's no need to raise your voice, to hit anything or do any other thing that shows lack of control. What kind of woman enjoys a guy that flies off the hook and is emotionally volatile?

Good advice from Francisco and BrotherAP. You should reply with a firm voice to let her know you are serious and you are not pleased with her.

Be wary of out of control anger though. Most people (men included, not just women) don't like to hang around people that cannot control their anger. Also, you are letting her win if she can figure out what buttons to push such that you lose control of yourself - don't let her control your emotions.

A young child may often throw fits and tantrums. But a strong man is in control of himself and his emotions.

Maximus_Decimus

 

[Maximus_Decimus]

Originally posted by isotope
yeah this is a good thread because girls often comment that i'm too calm, and how i dont get mad, ever

Let them know you are mildly angry with their behavior with a firm voice (as any good father would handle his children with). Just stay in control and don't go into an uncontrolled rage.

Originally posted by isotope
i think this is a flaw for DJ-ing because some women like a fiery tempered man who can excite them. Like, dont you have to be a little emotional to get HB's to be emotional too?

Yes, extremely LSE women with an abusive past may get an emotional high from this. Would you want to go out with such a woman anyways?

Maximus_Decimus