Hey guys
Want to read a story about a dj who got the great girl, then regressed to chump but is clawing his way back. What a challenge for me. But its worth it, and see what you think,
Heres my situation. See what you would make of it. I think she wants me back and I would be going back to a good thing, but I refuse to beg to go back. I am in the process of attracting her back and its working somewhat. I just want to see what you guys make of it. Any advice?
I met this girl when she was 19 and I was 24, and we had an awesome relationship for 6 years. It was full of long, hard, hot sex, great sexual tension and we really completed one another on a deeper level too. It was a heap of fun, and I was one funny mother f. She laughed her ass off. I grew our relationship upon solid dj principles, and this site is awesome for that. It really worked, and I changed myself completely. If anyone should doubt this stuff then my story will bring it home to you. Because I had it, then I lost it (dj principles)
I was a rock, I was a live wire, I was funny, and I was just the right amount of relationship material, you know the kind of stuff you do. I was sensational. I dealt with all of her **** tests, and I was composed. I really had a deep understanding of the magnetism of attraction and sexual tension (combined with long term ltr skills of listening, providing, etc). The relationship was alive and never boring, but was based on a deeper level to so we had an amount of certainty. She is a very good looking girl, on an adjusted scale to include everyone who's come into contact with me personally, she was rated 8.5 overall. And like, she knew other girls were attracted to me, I was attractive to her friends, she knew I could get anyone basically, parents accepted me, I was THE catch. I fought off all contenders and she loved it. It was my reality, we had moved in together. I even supported her for a whole year while she took time off to study (she had been studying/working at the same time when I met her but the load was too much).
So after 3 hot years she fell pregnant. It was not entirely her fault, as she has to take the weaker pill. So after a few times of thinking she was pregnant �sore boobs, etc �we'd sit out the back on the grass and laugh at how we escaped. To our surprise one day she DID fall pregnant.
That was the turning point. We ended up having two kids. I guess its happened to so many. She eventually became the leader in the relationship due to the kid-focus. I started to lose my life, and I went from alpha to beta. As things started to slip, I became more beta and more lazy in my saddness. We did not have much sex when the kids were born (so scratch out a year of sex over 6 years due to breast feeding/low libido) and due to my changing attitude I failed to turn her on as much. And due to her failing attitude toward me and her slight weight gain (she was about 110 pounds/50kg when I met her, then she ended up at 65kg/135 pounds). Not fat but she got flabby. And she had great tits, ass and body, flat stomach when I met her, but then she had a flabby tummy due to stretch marks and flabby arms, but not exactly fat. Her face was fatter tho. Nothing good gym work over a medium period could not rid you of.
But she lost desire to be desirable to me, and I lost desire to be that way for her. Our communication suffered. And over time I went from the great guy to the guy who 搉eeded a better job, was too lazy, who did not listen or do what he was told� I got more and more dis respect, and eventually she wanted to kick me out. But that took a year to achieve. Each time I went to move out, she would stop me. One day when she told me to go during a fight I said, 搒ure, i'm going, no problem, see you.�and I left.
So I went from DJ god with this girl to regressing to chump. But in my defence I stood to lose so much, a house, nice furniture, my kids, my wife (whom I still did so much with except sex and intimacy).
See thats the thing, the sex died off, the intimacy went. The kids consumed out lives. It was not a fault of our personalities, it was a fault of focus from us both. It just wasnt fun anymore, but she was a dedicated mother.
So anyway, a couple of weeks after I moved out, she tells me she felt so rejected by me due to the fall off. But I said I felt rejected by her. She then says that I stopped trying. Two years prior she caught me emailing a girl from high school (10 year reunion, I was 28 at the time) and she said she told her friend that she no longer thought I was the one she was meant to be with. But here is the thing. She has no time to sleep around, literally. She has two full time kids and does uni part time. Her whole week is spent looking after the kids at kindy/playgroup/swimming lesson. Its amazing to think she has gone without sex for over a year, considering our sex drive before �yet its understandable since she has little time or energy and I was not interested. One of my female friends with kids, said she herself went without sex for 5 years at one stage. I have not had sex for 1 year. The last time I had sex with my wife was when we conceived our second child, and we screwed for a few months after. That was one year ago. By the time our second child was born my wife and I were firmly out of love. Remember how I was getting all that disrespect about my job (tho I never missed a bill) and my laziness (but that was due to garden work which got done in the end anyway). I felt she was being unfair with me, and it seemed like she was making up reasons due to her unhappiness with our sex life. We got separated, I moved out.
Flash forward to now and the info I provided becomes valuable. I am still highly involved in her life and we get along well. We have had troubles sorting things out but we have worked through them. She is touching me more now, we high five, hug, exchange long glances, eye contact. She shows me her new dresses and today I did up the zip on the back. We lay close on the couch, we talk about old times, we seem to be getting back on track. BUT my last move before this stage began was to ask her if she was open to me eventually moving back in. At that point (1 month ago) she said she did not want to be in a relationship with me or anyone as she does not have any time whatsoever with uni and exams, etc and she would be proceeding with the divource come june next year.
We never had giant yelling fights, but she stresses so much it was hard to have a normal convo.
Want to read a story about a dj who got the great girl, then regressed to chump but is clawing his way back. What a challenge for me. But its worth it, and see what you think,
Heres my situation. See what you would make of it. I think she wants me back and I would be going back to a good thing, but I refuse to beg to go back. I am in the process of attracting her back and its working somewhat. I just want to see what you guys make of it. Any advice?
I met this girl when she was 19 and I was 24, and we had an awesome relationship for 6 years. It was full of long, hard, hot sex, great sexual tension and we really completed one another on a deeper level too. It was a heap of fun, and I was one funny mother f. She laughed her ass off. I grew our relationship upon solid dj principles, and this site is awesome for that. It really worked, and I changed myself completely. If anyone should doubt this stuff then my story will bring it home to you. Because I had it, then I lost it (dj principles)
I was a rock, I was a live wire, I was funny, and I was just the right amount of relationship material, you know the kind of stuff you do. I was sensational. I dealt with all of her **** tests, and I was composed. I really had a deep understanding of the magnetism of attraction and sexual tension (combined with long term ltr skills of listening, providing, etc). The relationship was alive and never boring, but was based on a deeper level to so we had an amount of certainty. She is a very good looking girl, on an adjusted scale to include everyone who's come into contact with me personally, she was rated 8.5 overall. And like, she knew other girls were attracted to me, I was attractive to her friends, she knew I could get anyone basically, parents accepted me, I was THE catch. I fought off all contenders and she loved it. It was my reality, we had moved in together. I even supported her for a whole year while she took time off to study (she had been studying/working at the same time when I met her but the load was too much).
So after 3 hot years she fell pregnant. It was not entirely her fault, as she has to take the weaker pill. So after a few times of thinking she was pregnant �sore boobs, etc �we'd sit out the back on the grass and laugh at how we escaped. To our surprise one day she DID fall pregnant.
That was the turning point. We ended up having two kids. I guess its happened to so many. She eventually became the leader in the relationship due to the kid-focus. I started to lose my life, and I went from alpha to beta. As things started to slip, I became more beta and more lazy in my saddness. We did not have much sex when the kids were born (so scratch out a year of sex over 6 years due to breast feeding/low libido) and due to my changing attitude I failed to turn her on as much. And due to her failing attitude toward me and her slight weight gain (she was about 110 pounds/50kg when I met her, then she ended up at 65kg/135 pounds). Not fat but she got flabby. And she had great tits, ass and body, flat stomach when I met her, but then she had a flabby tummy due to stretch marks and flabby arms, but not exactly fat. Her face was fatter tho. Nothing good gym work over a medium period could not rid you of.
But she lost desire to be desirable to me, and I lost desire to be that way for her. Our communication suffered. And over time I went from the great guy to the guy who 搉eeded a better job, was too lazy, who did not listen or do what he was told� I got more and more dis respect, and eventually she wanted to kick me out. But that took a year to achieve. Each time I went to move out, she would stop me. One day when she told me to go during a fight I said, 搒ure, i'm going, no problem, see you.�and I left.
So I went from DJ god with this girl to regressing to chump. But in my defence I stood to lose so much, a house, nice furniture, my kids, my wife (whom I still did so much with except sex and intimacy).
See thats the thing, the sex died off, the intimacy went. The kids consumed out lives. It was not a fault of our personalities, it was a fault of focus from us both. It just wasnt fun anymore, but she was a dedicated mother.
So anyway, a couple of weeks after I moved out, she tells me she felt so rejected by me due to the fall off. But I said I felt rejected by her. She then says that I stopped trying. Two years prior she caught me emailing a girl from high school (10 year reunion, I was 28 at the time) and she said she told her friend that she no longer thought I was the one she was meant to be with. But here is the thing. She has no time to sleep around, literally. She has two full time kids and does uni part time. Her whole week is spent looking after the kids at kindy/playgroup/swimming lesson. Its amazing to think she has gone without sex for over a year, considering our sex drive before �yet its understandable since she has little time or energy and I was not interested. One of my female friends with kids, said she herself went without sex for 5 years at one stage. I have not had sex for 1 year. The last time I had sex with my wife was when we conceived our second child, and we screwed for a few months after. That was one year ago. By the time our second child was born my wife and I were firmly out of love. Remember how I was getting all that disrespect about my job (tho I never missed a bill) and my laziness (but that was due to garden work which got done in the end anyway). I felt she was being unfair with me, and it seemed like she was making up reasons due to her unhappiness with our sex life. We got separated, I moved out.
Flash forward to now and the info I provided becomes valuable. I am still highly involved in her life and we get along well. We have had troubles sorting things out but we have worked through them. She is touching me more now, we high five, hug, exchange long glances, eye contact. She shows me her new dresses and today I did up the zip on the back. We lay close on the couch, we talk about old times, we seem to be getting back on track. BUT my last move before this stage began was to ask her if she was open to me eventually moving back in. At that point (1 month ago) she said she did not want to be in a relationship with me or anyone as she does not have any time whatsoever with uni and exams, etc and she would be proceeding with the divource come june next year.
We never had giant yelling fights, but she stresses so much it was hard to have a normal convo.
