"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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ex teaching my kid head games

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Master Don Juan
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My Ex is the best head game player I've known.
She rarely spends time with our kid, which makes her want to more.

when she comes back here, she has an attitude. She treats me to the same head game her mom used against me for 19 years.

She will say a little about the weekend, then when I ask her to tell me a little more (mind you I'm very nice to her about this), I get told "I don't know what you're talking about." This has always been a patent line used by my wife to shut me down. Total Denial. She's a fvcking expert at it. And now my 14yo is learning it. All I can really do at this point is just walk away, and stay away for three days or so, then she slowly straightens up. Any ideas how to deal with this, besides going over there and going "postal"?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Master Don Juan
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I've had this already in larger, more aggravating circumstances from her boys from her prior marriage. Thank GOD I don't have to deal with them anymore.
When it's happening to my kid, well you know...
 

parkthebus

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Sounds like you can handle the behaviour but the mum is still going to poison your child's future interactions with people. Only option I can see is to Garner hour child's loyalty, turn her against the mother and keep their contact to a minimum. If the mother does not benefit the child on the whole, do this.
 

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Master Don Juan
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I understand, however since my daughter sees her mom so little, it makes my girl want to do her mom's bidding more. It's how her mom works, it's how her mom played me with sex and anything else i ever wanted. Less attention made me try harder and harder. My ex-wife feeds off this.

It's the mom's method of manipulation. Had I known this before I knocked her up I would have totally bailed!! :eek:

I Was with her for five years before we made my kid.

Men, take note...it's a trap!!! A woman can hide her true self for a long time. :rolleyes:
 
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Young OG

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Sounds kind of like what I'm dealing with. My daughter goes to her mom's only on the weekends. She doesn't even want to go and asks to stay with me. When she comes back, she acts different towards me and my parents for the first couple days. Sometimes she will say things like her mom and blow up easily. She will slam doors when she gets mad. Her mom used to do this and also break things in the house when she got mad. She (my ex) once threw a bowl at a 60 inch lcd tv and broke it. I am worried but I don't think she will turn out like her mom. We just need to stay strong and raise them the best we can. Unfortunately we can't keep them from there mom, but we can teach them what behavior is right and wrong.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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