"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Ex often mentions talking to friends of mine

Maeisgood

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My ex-girlfriend calls or IMs me every now and then, and every time I feel suspicious of her motives.

She often mentions talking to or about my friends whom live miles away, but in the same state. I'm guessing this means she is trying to make me jealous or collect information on them to get revenge on me somehow. Is this paranoid thinking or is this not too far-fetched?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Analyzeit

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It's not too far fetched some chicks take the whole make your ex-boyfriend jealous thing to heart pretty deeply.

The fact that she tells you that she's been talking to your friends points more to the making you jealous idea, but some girls are just nuts and could be nothing to far fetched for women haha

But it could just be that she wants to talk to you and she brings up your friends because it's just something that you guys have in common and can talk about.

It really is paranoid thinking that she's trying to get information for revenge especially if it wasn't a messy breakup and she seems to be talking to you reasonably nicely so don't worry about her you don't want her anymore she can have your friends that live far away
 

RFish

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Yep I agree with Analyzeit.

Just don't feel suspicious of her motives because what can she do to you? If your friends are loyal to you and you guys shared a greater bond, they will defend you against her or will pretend nothing happen and let you know she is stabbing you.

If your friends got swayed by her then in anycase you didn't share the bond so just let these friends pass.

If other more experienced people were to reply to this thread they would say don't get involved with an EX. Yes you shouldn't unless she contacts back. For more information you can search up KontrollerX or Rollo Tomassi they are pretty slick with dealing with EX.

Just don't think too much. Get on youtube and listen to some songs :D
 

Scars

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Why are you still talking to your ex in the first place? Why do accept her phone calls/IMs. And WHY do you act so reactive to her? You're online posting about her STILL, so obviously you still care. Ignore it, ignore HER, move on.
 

KontrollerX

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Rollo Tomassi said:
Never root through the garbage once you drag the can to the curb. You get dirty, your neighbors see you do it and you rarely find what you thought was worth digging for.


It will always be time better spent developing a new plate (or 3) than attempting to repair an old one. The amount of effort and energy, the time you invest in trying to negotiate a previous GF desire is much better used with a new girl, with whom you have no prior history. I have no doubt you're emotionally invested in this, but you're far more likely to regret the effort you expend to repair it in comparison to meeting and developing with a new girl.

Far too many guys subconsciously think that getting back with the Ex will be easier than risking potential rejection with new women. They go back to the what they think was their "sure thing", with the logic being that she'd been sexual with him before so all he's got to do is fix what was wrong and go back to that guaranteed sex. The reality is actually the opposite - what was "wrong" in the prior relationship becomes the litmus test for the 'repaired' relationship and sex and genuine desire are now conditional. Getting with a new woman has none of these conditions or prior negotiations, and genuine desire isn't a compromise.
There you go. :)
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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