Ex-Girlfriend saga via IM (Home truths)

[HeyPachuco!]

Me: Come online properly, because I can't speak to you on here.

Her: Why not?

Me: Because you'll read it differently.

Her: Listen I ain't going to read it differently.

Me: I'd prefer to talk with you over the phone, so you can hear what I'm saying.

Her: It doesn't make no friggin difference, what you gonna say sorry?, Doesn't matter how you type or say it, means the same thing.

Me: So you aren't going to give me your number to talk (her name)?

Her: I dont really want you having my number, dont really want to hear your voice, so say what you gotta say now.

Me: And whys that?

Her: Because I don't.

Me: So your still holding a grudge?

Her: Lol, I dont wanna hear you, do you understand.

Me: Lol thats not a prob, so you'll rather look at words on a screen and emotions.

Her: Listen, this is not a grudge.

Me: Lol sure it isn't, stop being stuck up (her name)

Her: Stuck up!?, **** it! Why am I even arguing with you?

Me: Be civil, thats all thats required.

Her: Oh Please!

Me: Why are you acting like a stranger (her name)

Her: I am to you

Me: So you're carrying all this hate around? We need to talk..

Her: (my name) Don't piss me off! YOU need to talk, not WE.

Me: Why are you acting liek you haven't got any feelings for me?

Her: Are you having a laugh, not one feeling!

Me: Lol yh sure, well tell me that on that the phone?

Her: Dont be smart

Me: Lol, like seriously, your trying to tell me you dont think about me?

Her: Nope, and if I do, its about what a fool I was not to see you for who you where.

Me: Hahaha, now thats a lie!

Her: We didnt have NO fun times

Me: Lol seriously??

Her: Serious, you tell me a fun time? except for the fact we used to stay in all the time. We did nothing! You was crap, You shouldnt have even been making me stay with you all those times, you should have been encouraging me to make more money before I had to move down to the city.

You put all my sh!t on stop because your selfish!! All you did was fvck with my head. If I asked to do something, you'll turn it into some big a** arguement so we didnt have to go nowhere.

Looking back, fvck knows what your problem was, all you wanted to do was argue all the fvcking time.

Me: So it all comes out NOW? This is a first? I put your sh!t on stop? What?

Her: I said this to you before, you know what happend. You was there for me in the sense you was happy for what I was doing career wise. But you didnt care that I was coming up using money I didnt have and making me stay until the end of weekends. Because if I didnt want to stay you would fvck with my head once again and make me feel bad.

Look at the time, you wouldnt let me go back on the night to my cousins 18th birthday party!!!! So I had to go out of my way an travel back in the morning.

Or what about the time I was supposed to do work for my job and you caused such a fuss outside your house and I had to make up some bullsh!t reason, just for what? ...to stay in with you. I would've only been 2 hours

Do you want to hear more?

Me: So your complaining, that you had to come and see me? You've lost me?

Her: No, im not complaining at that you fool, thats why i dont even see the point in talkin to you because your so selfish you never see sh!t for what it is just how u want to.

If you actually read what I said for what I said and not what u want to read you should see a point.
We could've had all the time in the world to be around eachother
I didn't care coming to see u ,,duhh!!
I wanted to
But what the hell did you do for me?
what have you ever done for me?
I put loads of sh!t back an on hold or just called it off for you
You tell me one thing you've done?

Me: Why did you put so much on hold for me if I was so arguementative?

Her: Because I thought u were worth it
Answer the question tho
What did you do for me
one thing?

Me: You're getting into a whole different kettle of fish. Mostly, it was YOU coming down to see me. I haven't held YOU back from doing what ever YOU wanted to do. EVER.

Her: Haaaaa please
How many times did you come (her town name)
And I had to beg the last time!!!
Youu onli came TWICE
You Pr!ck!

Me: Wow, I didnt know it was a problem? Im only hearing this now?

Her: Yes, because your selfish
I know I used to always ask you to come down!! pr!ck
I shoudn't even of had to ask

Me: Always!? How did you figure that out? You've NEVER EVER told me it was a problem.

Her: Aww fvck this!

Have you like told yourself time and time again that you was good to me and where did it go wrong because if u couldn't see the woooow
I did tell u!
Then u wanted to go on fvcked up
I just never communicated like you
I would ask
Like friggin hell man I wasnt even aloud to go clubbing?
What, was you that insecure that I couldn't have a life
Because guese wat? I DID used to go out anyway
Just wouldn't let you know
Because you would've created world war 20!
and yeh I did let you no this.

Me: So when I first came to your house, where did you go? Nobody said anything about that. The FIRST TIME I come to see you, you went out! I stayed in with your fvcking dad.

Her: I always used to say u shouldnt be like this
WOOOOW THE ONE TIME
only because you couldnt say SH!T
It was already planned it was my best friends bday you fool
You wasnt suppose to come
You only came that day cos you thought it would've stopped me from going out the next day
Nearly worked but nah!

Me: Haha! So I came to see you to stop you from going out? Pahah! Hilarious.

Her: You thought it would've stopped me from goin out I mean
you no what I fVckin meant!

Me: This is all ignorant banter, the issue here is. How it all ended, it ended miserably. You cannot tell me that is not on your mind...

Her: Nope
I'm glad it did
It made it even more clear to me that you aint right for me
I was worth so much more
And I never hold a grudge ever, you know thats not me, but with you its diffrent you DISRESPECTED to the point I probably wont ever understand you
You acted worse than my ex!
Yeah, he might have rang my house and pretended to be you that time because he turnt into a freak for a second
But he would never of done or said any of that sh!t
Never been treated like that by ANYONE!

Me: It was much deeper than what you and your ex had. Lets be realistic here. Which ultimately is going to be more heartfelt and dangerous.

Her: O, please
You was holdin on to that excuse
You wasn't the one that had to go through anything ALONE and with the person who was suppose to be there verbally abusing you? just as your about to go have the operation and then just after have your dad randomly turn up!!
you just make me sick!!

Me: I said I was going to come with you to get the abortion and meet you at the hospital. You said you didnt want me there because of your dad, the night before.

 

[HeyPachuco!]

Continued ...


Her: No, what I said was,

I didnt mind u coming
But you couldnt stay at my dads house the night b4!
What you couldnt stay in a hotel? no? youur problem not mine, My dad didnt want you anywhere near his house b4 he even found that out and why because you helkd me by my throat outside my COLLEGE!
so yeah I wanted you there
But like the selfish brat you are
You didnt come
So please tell me why you didnt come again?
So what did u do? threaten me and tell me your going to tell my parents!!! Just cos u couldnt stay at his house!

Me: YOU told me, that your dad knew we weren't speaking. And that it would look suspicious if I came and he'll find out that your pregnant. Remember what you fvcking said!

Her: Yeah I did say it would be suspcious!!!
and why?
Because the week beore you tried to make it obvious and tell my dad the reason you manhandled me was because I was pregnant!!
Thats why I said it would be suspicious on top of the fact we were not speakin
What dont you get?
Even read wat you said?
Where did I say dont come down?
I just said yo u cant stay at my house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What u couldnt find even enough money to come down and stay in a hotel?
Because I told you why couldnt you jus do that
Where did I say dont come down!!?

Me: Nothing to do with that, I specifally remember you saying. DO NOT COME DOWN. When you was actually at the clinic. What do you expect me to do, reassure you? Even thouh you had said that?

Her: Are you talkin bout the actual day now!!!! Because if you're, then your fvcking sick in your head.

I texted you that morning, saying I thought about this all night
Because what did you do once again? Try and make me feel bad, Tellin me to prospone the abortion until we can talk things out.

What did you text me?
"You slvt"
Thats what you called me
So yep, after that
No, I didnt want you there
for what ?
so you can say more nasty sh!t to me..?

Me: Yeah I know I effed up that time, I lost control. I thought you where trying to shut me out. However, you sprang it out on me the very same week that you was definetly pregnant and the abortion was going to be the same week. It caught me by surprise... so thats why I reacted like that. I didnt mean what I said...

Her: Oh my god!!!!!!!!!

What was I telling you before I even 'knew' for a fact I was pregant, actually let me rephrase that,
Before YOU wanted me to prove it because I was tellin you I know my body and I already knew what it was
This was like a month before it happend!! (bull**** - it was like a week beore GUYS)
And what did I always say would happen?
I wouldnt keep it because it wasnt the right time
So when you wasnt talking to me, Yeah remember I couldnt get hold of you I had to text your mum!
I went to the doctors didnt I..
But I couldnt let you know straight away because I couldnt get HOLD of YOU!
So sorry if I had to plan sh!t by myself
And yeah that happend to mean that when you eventually thought you'd ring me, even the day you left me you knew where I was goin!!
You only had a week left to get used to the fact I was actually going to do it
When if you was there for me like you should've been from the start then you would've had time
But no your too selfish for that!
Instead you'd tell me I was a drama queen when I was hurting and tell me I owed you an apology when I find out that im not pregnant.
Remember!!!
Get all your fvckin facts straight before youu really try to say anything.
YOU FVCKED up
BIGTIME
There is nothing that goes on your side
You was not there one bit!

Me: I havent got anything to say, have you finished?

Her: Because you cant say anything
You knew I felt like this
Or fvck it if you didnt know it was because your tooo SELFISH to listen
Because I know for a fact that I said all of this
Especially the last time you came down
Why did I tell youu to leave my house?
Because all you did was argue with me over something you wouldnt want to believe
You made me unhappy.

Me: That wasnt the problem, you admitted that YOU WAS THE PROBLEM. And that you was acting like a b!tch. You said it yourself. Thats why you said to leave, but I was leaving anyway, on my own accord. You admitted taking out your anguish or hurt on me whilst I was there that time.

Her: If you couldnt figure out the real truth behind why I wasnt happy YOUR ****, the reason i said i didnt want to take it out on you was because even up to then I didnt wana be nasty to you, never have been.

You havent even said SORRY. I aint ever caring again. Your new girl, I feel sorry for her. I stopped caring from that day. I dont feel like Im missing out on anything and thats sad. At the time evrything seemd fine. But lookinbg back? it was sh!t. Know good memories...none!

 

[HeyPachuco!]

I'm glad to say I've overcome this. Nothing but lies on her behalf in that little convo.

First of all we did do a hell of alot. JUST THE TIMES SHE WANTED TO GO OUT AND I DIDNT BOTHER she threw her toys out the pram. JUST ONCE!!!

It takes two people to do something!!! I took charge in most things we would occupy our time with. I admit I was manupulative. For instance if she would go clubbing, I would act like a spoilt brat and pretend I didnt care.... Or just txt some random girl in her face.

Please tell me what I done wrong here and what never to do again? Please take inconsideration.. this was a year ago when I had AFC traits.

She is my ultimate NEMISIS. I can see why she hates me... In the sense that she had an abortion. I've finished and washed my hands of her, I left a mark. Thats good enough for me.. I'm not the one to be seeking redemption. We both made a mistake.

 

[Igetit!]

Man,all I can say is



WOOOOW.




Dude,that is one ANGRY WOMAN,freakin" HATEFUL.



That girl is SEETHING with hate.

I was wondering why she wouldn't let you talk to her over the phone.


Now I see why.


Seems like she hates you so much,she doesn't even want to hear the sound of your voice.

Nothing but lies on her behalf in that little convo.

I don't know if this is true or not. It's usually easy to tell when a girl is not being straight with you because she'll say things that logically make no sense.


This girl seemed pretty sure of what she was saying.


She seemed to know the where,when,how,exact details and facts about how things went down.


There was no stuttering or long pauses generally used to give herself time to think of another lie to come up with. She was just dead on with fact after fact,detail after detail.

Please tell me what I done wrong here and what never to do again?

You mean you don't know?

WOW.


Well,you need to kill being insecure for one thing. You're girl actually made some valid points. If you're girl wants to spend time with her friends,then let her. Just because she's out of you sight for a moment doesn't mean she's going to cheat on you.




If it's in her heart to cheat,you making her stay at home ONE NIGHT won't solve anything. If a person wants to cheat,they'll find a way to cheat.



Also,you might not want to call the woman you're dating and who's carrying your child a "slvt".


Generally speaking,that tends not to go over too well.



Oh,and holding a woman by her throat...bad idea.


You should NEVER put your hands on a woman.


Unless you want to share a cell with "Big Bubba",do whatever you have to do to avoid doing that. Walk away,run,end the conversation,whatever,but don't touch her.


I'm pretty sure you didn't get her pregnant on purpose,so there's no need to tell you to use birth control. However,YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE to support her when she went to the hospital.


That's not something a woman wants to go through alone.



It just seems to me there was a miscommunicatioin there about you showing up at the hospital. Maybe you were under the impression that she didn't want you there,who knows.

But she obviuosly did.




Seems to me like there was all kind of emotional turmoil...even before the pregnancy. Her getting pregnant and you not being there for her was probably the last straw.




It almost seemed like you two had a parent/child relationship instead of a mature man/women sexual relationship.



She was talking about you wanting her to stay at home,and she sneeked out. That's what kids do.




Well if you've washed your hands of her and it's over with,then fine, however,learn from this so you won't make the same mistakes again.

 

[HeyPachuco!]

Dude thanks for replying, I dont know how you know or did it, but you hit the nail on the head!

Yes there was some smotional turmoil before she fell pregnant which was the last straw. Neither of us broke up with eachother before the other.

Now,

With MY INSECURITIES with her. I had none! Well I didnt show it. She herself had said " YOU DO NOT SHOW YOUR EMOTIONS, I DONT THINK YOU WANT TO BE WITH ME, YOUR JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO BREAK AWAY FROM ME .." She had said this whilst sobbing.

She never went out as it is when ever she wasnt with me!!! Everytime I was on the phone to her day in day out! So how could she be out? Thats ONE LIE.

Second LIE - "We didnt do anything .." That was rich, since this is coming from a girl who has NEVER been in a stable relationship or has never been taken out in any of her previous relationships if that. What heart me out of everything is to be called "CRAP" ...The one time we didn't go somewhere she got so hot and bothered. So I ended up with saying (even tho I didnt want to go), do you want to go out then because its better that seeing you like this ..

3RD LIE - She was stringing me along the whole week she said she was pregnant. For instance she agreed to show me the Pregnancy test and when I went to her college, she didnt bring it. 4TH LIE - That I held her by her throat, NO, I merely grabbed her arms and shook her abit, then SHE grabbed her throat/ necklace and I grabbed her hand!!! - YES I SHOULDNT OF EVEN DONE THIS.

I have NEVER EVER put my hands on a woman, if a woman can drive you to that state of emotion, then YOU'VE LOST. Putting feet and hands on a woman is cheating in my books.

Also, she didnt make it clear whether she wanted me to come to the hospital. What I'd like to know to this date, is, WHY GET PREGNANT, KNOWING WELL THAT YOU'RE NOT ON THE PILL? A WOMAN IS IN MORE CONTROL OF THAT THAN A MAN.

I messed up on the verbal abuse part. But I cant find it in my heart to say sorry about it. Look what she said? she used to go out anyway, without letting me know. She's lying in that aspect, making me out to be INSECURE. All I would say is "dont call me tommorow then .." - Which is childish, but sorry, If im saying this.. How does that make me insecure???


I spoke to her friend recently and she said " I was there at the hospital with her when you was coming with your sh!t, I've seen the emotional damage you've done to her .."

Seems like I'm the badguy here and its all on me?

About 6months into the relationship, I started having feelings and thoughts in my head that I would cheat on her. Then when she wasnt in my sight, I would get anxious. Yes maybe I was a little insecure. But nothing where she could SEE. She had told me that she had run out of tears, I really thought she would be the one to carry my kids through life and the one I would potentially marry.

The day this happend, I think I got so high and drunk, I turned BURGONDY. Couldnt sleep eat, nothing! couldnt wake up with a dry pillow for atleast a week. NEVER thought we would break up, or break up like that. The whole thing RAPED my emotions. When we was on good terms, it was brilliant! even on bad terms we would always have some sought of joke inbetween and the tension would die down. I'll never forget the look she gave me when she left me that day after college ..it dismantled my spine.

Live and learn experience huh!!!?

 

[Joe Stud]

WOW. Usually what comes to mind is: "theres a fine line between love and hate"... but she makes it pretty clear. Well, nobody can say she "had you wrapped around her little finger" LOL

but... why does my gut tell me you can still convert her into a FB in about 2 months? LOL