Ex-gf back....sort of....

[Pakwah]

Had a long history with the ex, she is my babyzmamma, we were together for 3 years...she had a new bf, together for almost 2 years...they just broke up last week...
This girl screwed me over financially, a pain in the ass, sent me to court over ****.
So now she moved into a new place, and goes from complete ***** to friendly. i get the fact now that she is single, reel me in to get anything she wants...which she wont
Anyways, im surprised at myself cuz in the last few years i have learned a hell of a lot, thinking if we met now, i would not have been such a pushover.
I see her now, and past the crap and **** we went through, i would want nothing more than to just slam her against a wall, and take out 3 years of frustration on her in all the right ways
why am i now acting like nothing ever happened....i notice we dont always talk, we are flirting, im being an smart ass, she talks about us again....i know mind games, i wont fall for them on her part.
why now thinking nothing but **** about her, am i now thinking how i would love to just touch her everywhere....wtf...

 

[smtimex]

Even though your heart says otherwise, listen to your mind. You said it yourself, she was a pain in the ass and screwed you over on numerous accounts. You two broke up for a reason and rarely do things end up working out again after getting back together.

She's probably feeling lonely right now and is turning to something she feels will be a quick fix towards that comfort shes missing. It happens every time one of my ex g/f's breaks up with her boyfriend.. she comes running back to me. But once she finds something, I don't hear from her for months. Save yourself the time and potential heartache.

Walk away man, walk away.

 

[aix237]

In a somewhat similar situation except I didnt have a kid. But i was with this girl for 2 years. We broke up like 2.5 years ago. She fvcked me over somewhat like just did fvcked up sh1t and we broke up she was being so stupid about sh1t and ended dating some dude for 2 years that her roomate and best friend were fvcking at the same time. yea classy. So fast forward 2.5 years later to last weekened. I make a drunken phone call for the first time in 2.5 years to her. She calls back the next day. I ask her where shes living now. She ends up living fvckin 30 seconds away from me. I go to see her. We start drinking and she starts flirting and we talk about sh1t. She apologizes for being an idiot and puts some moves on me. We start kissing then she busts out I love you. I was like wtf. Well i said it back cause I really do. She also kept saying im single for a while now and i barley have sex (yea right). She could be lonely right now i dont know. Then we proceed to have sex and she is letting me have her way with her. It was weird cause she was like ill do this and that if you want etc. We wake up the next morning we fvck again then I go home (30 seconds down the street lol). Anyways I get home and Im confused with mixed emotions and sh1t was turning my stomach. I was like fvck that b1tch then I was like i love her and want to work things out again. My heart was saying i love this girl and hopefully we can do things again. MY mind is like this girl is a wh0re and is disrespectful to everyone and is way too selfish and likes to play little games to seek attentino. I called her 2 nights later to see if she wanted to rent a movie (actually wasnt going to, planned to go drinking but i wanted to see if she would answer and or call back.) well no answer or call back yet. Now im like really fvck this b1tch with my mind and heart. Haha shell call probalby in the near future ill answer and go over at 2 am when shes drunk casue she wants to fvck even though i know i shouldnt. Im confused like you.

 

[drak_ool]

OP, how much do you care about your kid? Because if you want the kid to be balanced growing up he will need both of his parents to be able to at least act neutral with each other. It always sucks when one of the parents is always s.hit talking the other in front of the kids.

With that in mind, realize that by starting to mess around with a woman who f.ucked you over before and for whom you have no respect will lead to no good. Either you will f.uck her over this time around, which will make her hate you, or she will do what she did the first time around and you will hate her even more.

From how I see it, it will be a loose-loose situation for your kid in the long run, so better to not get involved with her emotionally...

 

[KontrollerX]

Move on to someone else.

Fvck her once and really good if you need to in order to pay her back, make sure you are using a condom and pour tobasco sauce in it afterwards but let that be the end of it.

She had her chance to be with you but fvcked you over in more ways than any human should ever be allowed to.

She needs to be left to someother fool that will be dumb enough to get involved with her scandalous ass.

If you don't move on and get her out of your life completely after you hit it one last time you deserve whatever new bad sh!t she does to you.

Don't come crying to us when you marry this stupid b!tch and she divorces you and takes half your sh!t.

 

[Desdinova]

This girl screwed me over financially, a pain in the ass, sent me to court over ****.

And you're going to tell us that you're 100% not to blame for any of this? You allowed yourself to be screwed over. If you leave your safe open and tell a woman to take what she needs to cover her expenses, she'll take it all and create expenses she never had before.

You also have a child to think about. Is returning to this woman going to be in your child's best interest, or is keeping her out of your life actually going to be beneficial for the child?

...and there's never anything wrong with giving a woman a taste of what she had, and leaving her wanting more of what she cannot have.

 

[Pakwah]

my fault is was trusting too damn much, not feeling the effects so much now that a day has passed......
court was just her being a *****,doing **** that she knew she could, making my life difficult, mountains out of molehills.
And hell no, i don't want to get back with her...oh no.
I called her today about my boy, and after she gave me what i asked, i was all ok...she was 'thats it?' i say 'uh yeah'....as if she expected to talk more.
I strangely look forward to the next time we are together....
i could spend time thinking about it, but then i just imagine the things she said to me about swearing off men for a while, and her being a better person all a lie, and while i am thinking about what i can say or do next, she could be out screwing a guy she just met at the bar, trying to play me for a sucker again, its small but i don't like that hint of mind control, yet thats exactly what i am after - try and keep her guessing, let her know i am not her friend

 

[Pakwah]

...and there's never anything wrong with giving a woman a taste of what she had, and leaving her wanting more of what she cannot have.

thats my principal goal, would i ever want to be with her again? physically sure but bf/gf no way.
so i try and leave that door somewhat open, i dont want to make her despise me.
today, i was in her area, and had our boy, had to pick something up so went in for a second, my boy was on my lap, she is sitting next to me, and says 'you can always have a hug and a kiss....you to kid'.
then starts off again telling me what looked good on me, what she liked, she blew me a kiss, but i grabbed it and tossed it on the ground like i was butting out a smoke.
i guess she likes blaming the game too, i know her ex-bf was over, probably left before i got there....don't care.

 

[Jeffst1980]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=149268

If you get physical with this girl she is going to screw you over AGAIN. Guaranteed.

It's a lot harder to separate sex from relationships when it comes to banging an ex than you think. It's one thing to sit back and say that you could have sex with her and then dump her ass with no feelings getting in the way, and it's quite another thing to actually do it. You have too much of a history with this girl and she's messed you up too much to be able to think rationally about this.

 

[ReaverDJ]

I went through this same exact ****, I mean EXACT ****, when I was 22 years old and with the mother of my daughter. I could go through all the details, but basically to summarize it would be to make it something similar to your post. I got screwed emotionally, financially, socially any word that could possibly end with -ly happened to me.

Please listen to this piece of advice whenever you think about getting back with this girl.....even if she is the mother of your child.

Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me......

 

[WC2]

Ask KontrollerX, I was in this situation about a year ago.. without the kid and financial troubles.

Of course you want to do dirty things to your EX. You've probably spent the past few years imagining what her boyfriend was doing to her. I was in your shoes for awhile.

Now that she's moved on and done with him, she is seeking comfort. Whether it's financial comfort or emotional comfort, it's NOT HEALTHY COMFORT. If anything it is temporary.

I can't tell you how many times I had my ex come back and manipulate me into spending time with her again. She'd use sex and cute lines to win me back. As the sucker I was, I believed it and ate it up.

Come to find, 6 months she turned right back into the lying wh0re she always was. These women never change. The only way to attempt to change them is to send them down the road and never look back in hopes that they'll learn what it is not to be so manipulative.

This girl screwed you financially? HA! You should be AVOIDING her at all costs. I don't care if her vagina tastes like the rainbow, it's not worth it.

Listen, my EX screwed me over emotionally, but yours is screwing with your lifestyle and money. Not cool. What do you think happens when she becomes comfortable with the fact that you're in love with her again? You better bet she's going to turn to her old ways. It doesn't matter if she says she's changed, SHE HASN'T. IF YOUR EX SAYS SHES CHANGED, THIS MEANS SHE IS MAKING AN EXCUSE FOR THE FACT SHE HASN'T.

I don't want to be screaming here, but you need to understand that going back to a woman who has disrespected you NEVER works. She always knows she has you by the balls, even if she is at your beckon call every day. My Ex was my slave in our relationship, but once I let her back after she got with some other dude, she knew from that point that she could do whatever she wanted. I continued to think that I could control her, but the bottom line is once something like that happens, it's going to happen again.

Tread carefully

 

[Pakwah]

I am not looking to ever get back with her...ever
Again...never getting back in a relationship...her guys now to me are the band guys, or bar guys, or bad boys with drama. I am not near that, nor do i want to be. I accept it, i know it, i could not give her the drama she needs...nor do i want to.
I understand that at any moment, she will find a new guy and all this is over, and thats cool with me.
Dont want her back...but back in bed...well.....thats different.
The wanting to just jump her bones has sub-sided quite a bit
Its just a game to me, flirting, her ex already told me the same **** i already heard, cept it was with him, the money problems, arguing, etc...
I was thinking in my head of calling her on the 'hug and kiss' thing next time she brings it up.
Say 'ok, give me one' - and see if she does and then call her on it if she doesn't and say - pffhh - all talk
I want to still remain distant, i pick the odd fight on the phone with her, and then be nice to her the next day, we will fight on the phone and then ill call her back and say 'just wanted to hear your voice one more time today' - ill get a shut up or f-off -
treading carefully yes - i just want to look unavailable and make any move hers.

i realized alot of what she said in our relationship makes sense now, when i would stay home, she would go out to the bar, i would let her do whatever she wanted, she used to tell me to go out somewhere, anywhere, but i would say i dont want to go out. At the bar if i did go, she would be dancing with her friends and i was the loser sitting at the table alone.
I became boring to her, thing is, when we first got together, she threw out all her old bf pics, poems about any exs, notes she had, she gave it all up saying she did not need them anymore. Looking back on that, i guess she in the beginning really cared. Then i became too forgiving, less exciting. I look back on that and i have learned so much. I am not like that anymore, i keep busy, i have things to do, i am less emotional, less trusting.

 

[Gia Giovanni]

And you're going to tell us that you're 100% not to blame for any of this?.

You also have a child to think about. Is returning to this woman going to be in your child's best interest, or is keeping her out of your life actually going to be beneficial for the child?

...and there's never anything wrong with giving a woman a taste of what she had, and leaving her wanting more of what she cannot have.

Sure ... it's her fault he forgot to wear a condom. :nono:
It's her fault he will not have a vasectomy.
I suspect it would be her fault too if his car ran out of gas. :yes:

 

[WC2]

I am not looking to ever get back with her...ever
Again...never getting back in a relationship...her guys now to me are the band guys, or bar guys, or bad boys with drama. I am not near that, nor do i want to be. I accept it, i know it, i could not give her the drama she needs...nor do i want to.
I understand that at any moment, she will find a new guy and all this is over, and thats cool with me.
Dont want her back...but back in bed...well.....thats different.
The wanting to just jump her bones has sub-sided quite a bit
Its just a game to me, flirting, her ex already told me the same **** i already heard, cept it was with him, the money problems, arguing, etc...
I was thinking in my head of calling her on the 'hug and kiss' thing next time she brings it up.
Say 'ok, give me one' - and see if she does and then call her on it if she doesn't and say - pffhh - all talk
I want to still remain distant, i pick the odd fight on the phone with her, and then be nice to her the next day, we will fight on the phone and then ill call her back and say 'just wanted to hear your voice one more time today' - ill get a shut up or f-off -
treading carefully yes - i just want to look unavailable and make any move hers.

i realized alot of what she said in our relationship makes sense now, when i would stay home, she would go out to the bar, i would let her do whatever she wanted, she used to tell me to go out somewhere, anywhere, but i would say i dont want to go out. At the bar if i did go, she would be dancing with her friends and i was the loser sitting at the table alone.
I became boring to her, thing is, when we first got together, she threw out all her old bf pics, poems about any exs, notes she had, she gave it all up saying she did not need them anymore. Looking back on that, i guess she in the beginning really cared. Then i became too forgiving, less exciting. I look back on that and i have learned so much. I am not like that anymore, i keep busy, i have things to do, i am less emotional, less trusting.

Yes you are not like that anymore. You keep busy, have things to do, and you are less emotional-- SO MOVE ON TO A BETTER WOMAN.

From the way you're talking it sounds to me like you want to "pvssyfoot" your way back into attracting her, thinking you can just slide out at the last second and move on.

Let me fill you in : It will never happen.

If you spark attraction with this girl and start doing things with her again, even "distantly" you WILL (mark my words) eventually fall back into her trap. It's not really an issue of what you do in the future with her, but what she has done in the past to you. She knows this and will forever know she can do it to you.

Like I said, I've gone back to an EX with a whole new attitude on things. I got her to fall in love with my uncaring attitude very quickly, just to see her try to manipulate me again.

You talk of this like a game, which disgusts me. This is a serious issue you need to fix in your life. You've got a kid who is basically fatherless and lives in a home with his mother (from what I gather). Then you have a woman who has manipulated you emotionally and financially. What kind of example are you going to set for your kid playing games with his mother?

Be a good father to this kid. Come to some civil terms with this woman and don't even think about playing any romance games at this point. Be single, have fun, make money, and eventually find a new woman if you like. It's too late in the game to be playing games on a broken playing field.