Ex asking to hang out

[Ackles]

So, I have this ex who I was pretty good friends with before we dated (friends for about 14 years I'd say). We dated for two years but she cut things loose. We have been trying to do the "stay friends" thing but it's just been awkward each time we hang out since things have changed between us.

She has dated since then, but came to me earlier in the year saying she was tempted to get back together and still liked me and missed me. I pursued it but she backed off, leaving me feeling used and strung along. I told her this and she apologized and explained that she didn't want to mess things up between us as she is known to do in her past relationships and didn't want me to hate her if we broke up again. That she was feeling "crazy" and didn't want to put us through that.

Needless to say, she is seeing someone else again. She still messages me and asks me to hang out, telling me not to be a stranger. Even asked me if I wanted to hang out with her and her bf one night (what's that all about?).

I'm not sure what to do in this situation. I'd like to maintain the friendship, but I'm still attracted to her (of which I've told her). Any advice? any of you guys been in a situation like this before?

 

[dustmuffin]

I would cut ties
You don't need to put up with that ****. She is using you. Run

 

[Ackles]

Let's assume I'm a complete idiot here (not far from the truth it seems, lol). What is she using me for? Attention? A back up plan?

 

[dustmuffin]

Let's assume I'm a complete idiot here (not far from the truth it seems, lol). What is she using me for? Attention? A back up plan?

Yes to all. She is using you to make herself feel good. Attention validation and a back up plan. You wernt good enough but she wants you around incase she can't find something. Better. She probably uses you as an emotional tampon too. You two won't get together. Leave find other women. It will be best for your mental state.

 

[GS750]

She's keeping you in her life for selfish reasons. It could be any number of things (attention/validation, backup, friends, etc). Women do this. Some guys allow it clinging to the hope that they will be rewarded for it, which usually never happens. Drop her from your life. Staying friends with her will only make it worse.