Everythings going well... and now...

[XTrance]

Well, ive read alot of work on this site, it has all made sense and helped me much on the confidence side. Except i still have one problem and i cant seem to find out how to fix.

All of my friends, and family, know me as the quiet type of person.. and i know if i change suddenly it will seem weird, (and probably fake) to them.
I am the type of person who sits at parties and laughs but doenst talk a whole lot unless spoken too. I dont want to be this person anymore, but if i suddenly start talking much more, it will suprise everyone and they will bring up the subject blah blah blah... and i would rather not have to go through with all of this. Is there anyway to change easier...? I mean... when some of my friends talk about me to their friends, they describe me as quiet. If i just started talking to everyone while they were there... they wouldnt know what to think and i wouldnt know what to tell them.

 

[blinkwatt]

You could initiate conversations like everyone else and say "Hi". Its not unusual.

 

[XTrance]

It is unusual for the people who already know me.

 

[Ace of Flames]

If someone asks why you're suddenly being so social, just tell them you're here to enjoy yourself, and then walk off with a smile.

Who said everything had to be easy? Sometimes, you just need to break into something if you want to make a dent. So what if everyone asks you questions? If you're trying to be as social and confident as you say you are, you should be able to handle a few shocking looks and reactions. As long as you don't back out once you start, everyone will accept it soon enough. Then this thread will be over with.

 

[XTrance]

I can understand how that will work thats the easy part. But what about my family? My mother always has to comment on my life. Ive tried countless times to make her stop. Everytime i mention a girl she tries her damnedest to embarass me. It pisses me off that even after im 18 she still feels she has to treat me this way. Any ideas on how to get her to stop and get over it without cussing her out?

 

[blinkwatt]

Thats a mom,they try to humilate us. Its funny how I NEVER talk to my parents about any of my relations with any ladies,they like to poke fun or make comments "Whatever happens use a condom",basically unneeded lines. Its life,there are things that you can't avoid though,LIKE TALKING SO DO IT. Just keep to yourself and do what YOU WANT,who cares what others think.

 

[XTrance]

What am i supposed to say to her when she keeps asking dumb questions about my relationships -.-?

 

[Ace of Flames]

Just humor her. She's your mom, that's what mom's do. They worry.

If you're gonna let your mom's little comments STOP you from being more social and getting girls.... well..... might as well live in her basement.

 

[XTrance]

Yea but the problem is, everytime i bring a girl home or something, she ends up saying something which ruins my vibe completely, my mother isnt the same as most peoples, she seriously just doesnt realize how weird she can come off. I have resorted to not allowing girls im interested in to even come into my house, and i would much rather not have to do this. Everytime i bring a girl to my house, my mother gets into her lifes buisiness (last time my mother called the girls father to ***** to him about how bad of a father he is. the girl ended up crying, and never came back.)
And my sister is a serious attention *****, she ends up talking to the girl, and next thing i know, the girl is visiting my sister instead of me.

 

[Ace of Flames]

Haha damn, sounds like a sitcom.

Well then, just deal with it for now, and when you can move out or go to the dorms in college, do it. In the meantime, always go back to the girl's house. lol.

 

[blinkwatt]

I have resorted to not allowing girls im interested in to even come into my house, and i would much rather not have to do this.

I do this,my dad is just embarassing. He says I can close my door or have them here past 2A.M.,what a ****block. Oh well,I'm old enough to rent out a hotel now,or there is always her place,a car,a park, or I wait till he leaves town. No excusses,excusses are for the weak minded. THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY,now think of one.

 

[XTrance]

Im not saying there isnt a way. There are plenty of ways. But i would like my house to at least be one of them =/. And like aces said, those dorms are looking like heaven right now.

 

[XTrance]

Ok... i guess there is no easy way to change, i suppose ill just work on it.