Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Everything You Need To Know!

De La Soul

Master Don Juan
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The Don Juan's Reference Guide

The 9 Principles:

[*] Eliminate your desperation by focussing on your dreams and passions in life. In other words, stop desperately desiring women in the hope that they will make your life good and realise that only you can make your life good. I would say that the single easiest and most rewarding way of attracting women is to have a job that you REALLY ENJOY doing; the people who get most respect in life are those who do what they love to do. Achieving dreams is the ultimate source of happiness.

In a nutshell: When you live your life with ambition and act on it, women will become fascinated with you. No kidding.

---------------------------------------------

[*] Embrace your sexuality. There is no other way. Embracing your sexuality means using KINO (affectionate touching, but for those new to Kino, think of it as non-sexual until it becomes second nature" - T Dog). Kino is great because it makes women think of you as a possible sexual partner rather than a "Let's just be friends" guy. Eye contact, and not being afraid to talk about sexual things are also great helps. "A woman would rather be with a male, no matter how tyrannical, over an androgynous, no matter how nice". Make sure she knows you are a male, with male desires. It's funny that the very thing that should come most naturally to us, as men, that is acting like men and being sexual with women can often be the most difficult to master. But once you've got it, you'll really see the difference.

In a nutshell: Kino, a smile, and eye contact. Works like a charm.

---------------------------------------------

[*] Be a challenge. Because you and your dreams are your number one priority in life you are dependent on nothing and nobody apart from yourself. So why would you put her on a pedestal like a queen? If you think of a female as a queen or some sort of supreme being, you will act like she is. If you act like she is, then she will know that you think of her that way. Once she realises that she has been able to put you under her spell she will think, “Hey, if this guy can become so obsessed with me, imagine what other guys I could get.” She will quickly run away to a more confident jerk.

Note: It is very important that you PROVE YOUR WORTH to the woman before you decide to "be a challenge". Because at the end of the day, being a challenge only works if she knows what she's missing out on. When I first came to this site a year or so ago, I interpreted "Be a challenge" as, "Show no interest, and wait for women to act." You can guess where that got me... nowhere. Prove your value.

In a nutshell: Never put a woman on a pedestal.

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[*] Confidence and Charisma are more attractive than looks. Think of yourself as the Great Catch, the one that all girls want to be with, the one that attracts girls like magnets. If you think of yourself this way, so will others. Don’t forget to smile, this is key for charisma because noone wants to be around a depressed person. Listen and you will be listened too. Accept others (unless they are complete jerks) and you will be accepted, but remember, you have to let them know that you accept them (say "Hi", smile etc.).

In a nutshell: Think of yourself as The Man (without telling other people) and be WARM to other people.

---------------------------------------------

[*] Do not stop to think, never hesitate. Does a confident man stop to think about what could happen? No. A confident man (the good guy) strikes decisively without hesitating and should never regret it. An unconfident man (the nice guy) stops and thinks, and consequently the unconfident man is left to think about what could have happened if he had taken action.
Does a confident man stop to think about whether or not he should make a move, whether or not a girl likes him, how he could get her to like him? No. A confident man doesn’t stop to think about the girl’s interests until they are dating. The confident man looks at all the girls and takes what he wants.

In a nutshell: Hesitation = Masturbation

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[*] The confident man goes through life with the path of an arrow. He does not bend himself to fit into other peoples’ lives, he does not twist himself to appease the whims of others. He lives his life for himself. This does not mean that he is an uncaring jerk. He does take others needs into consideration but if others needs disrupt his purpose too acutely he will walk away and continue on his path.

In a nutshell: Live your life on your terms.

---------------------------------------------

[*] The Don Juan sees failure as only a temporary set-back to inevitable success. He knows that he is statistically more likely to be rejected than accepted. He also knows that if he increases his rate of attempts (without diminishing quality) the success will come, and he will barely notice the rejections. You can only have success, once you can accept failure.

In a nutshell: "If you have tried to do something and failed, you are vastly better off than if you had tried to do nothing and succeeded."

---------------------------------------------

[*] Let go! Take action! Let go of all your fears, past experiences, and possible future experiences. Live like you will die today. The only way to never again experience the regret and pain of not making a move is to always take action. Sitting on your butt will get you nowhere in this life. You have to push past your initial doubt to avoid experiencing regret. This will give you confidence, flamboyance, and charisma.

In a nutshell: Live for the moment.

---------------------------------------------

[*] Fun! At the end of the day, there's no point in doing any of this unless you're having fun. Don't see approaching as a chore, see it as an opportunity to have fun. When you're having fun, you're happy - we all want to be happy, so why not have fun all the time? And not only will you become a happier person, but you will become more attractive, because being fun is the most attractive quality a man can possess.

In a nutshell: Dealing with women should ALWAYS be fun for you.

***

There is one common element in all of these principles: IT'S ALL ABOUT YOU and what goes on inside your head. If you can control your thinking, you can have pretty much any woman alive. You have to always live your life on your terms, always look out for #1.

You should never imagine that you have to do or say the "right" thing. There is never a "right" thing to do or say. What matters more is how you do it. If you ever catch yourself thinking, Hey I could have said something better there, I wonder if she thought it was funny... stop yourself and remember that you're not living your life for her, you're living it for you.

A man with bubbly self confidence and warmth chatting and having fun with a woman will stand out over a drooling moron trying to say the right thing to a woman any day. Not only will he get the girl, but he'll be more successful in other social situations and he'll most likely live his life much more completely.

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---------------------------------------------

A Few Great Articles

1. Pook, "Kill That Desperation":
Become the Great Catch! http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000199.html

2. Pook, "Be a Man":
Real men are in short supply, and high demand. You do the math. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000371.html

3. CHALLENGE GUY, "COURAGE":
Just do it! http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000974.html

4. Paradox, "On Rejection":
You can only have success when you accept failure. After all, it's part of the game. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000686.html

5. xblitz44x "Seductive conversation":
Make her hot for you, using words. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/002198.html

6. SexPDX, "Giving Off the Sexual Vibe":
Nick (SexPDX) is the man. He and xblitz44x are the ultimate authorities on "Speed Seduction" at sosuave. I love this tip. It's money, baby. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/017796.html

7. Pook, "Patience: What Truly Makes a Don Juan":
Control You Eagerness http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000130.html

8. Rico, "Smiling":
If you don't smile, you don't have warmth http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000565.html

9. Poet, "How to be a better conversationalist":
Forget about those awkward silences! http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000235.html

10. Take No Dirt, "How to Keep a Gal":
For some, keeping is harder than getting http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/001237.html

11. JuanWannabe, "Fine Tune You Sense of Humor":
Make her Laugh! http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000397.html

12. Giovanni Casanova, "Charm and Charisma": A charasmatic man attracts women like moths to a flame http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/001621.html

13. DeepBlue, "What KINO is REALLY all about":
Find out how to do kino and why it is important http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/001604.html

14. De La Soul, "The Alpha Male":
Become the leader of the pack http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/001599.html

15. Robert Jordon, "Overcoming FEAR is easy when you know how..."
Rid yourself of that horrible creature, fear! http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000043.html

16. BigBill "It hasn't been that bad."
Getting rejected is never as bad as you imagine... http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000706.html

17. DarkDream, "The Holy Grail of Dating"
Don't be intimidated by the size, this is a great article! http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/001174.html

18. JPFromTally, "How to be a stud in bed."
The title says it all http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000228.html

19. T Dog, "The Ultimate Kino Guide"
Kino, the most important technique. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/001677.html

20. Sir_Chancealot, "Sir_Chancealot's definitive neg-hit post"
Break down the ***** barrier! http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/001557.html

21. De La Soul, "Raise Her Inerest in You!"
How to create attraction... http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/001888.html
---------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------

In summary, the 9 Don Juan principles are

1. Kill your desperation by making ambitions your number one priority.

2. Embrace your sexuality by using kino, using kino more and......using kino.

3. Be a challenge. After you have shown that you are a cool, sexual, fun guy, don't be a puppy dog following a certain woman around. Live your own life first!

4. Confidence and charisma are keys. Confidence is all in the mind. You have to know you are "the man" before you can become "the man". To be charismatic: smile, be happy, accept others, listen and be listened to.

5. DO NOT HESITATE! Hesitation breeds fear. Fear is useless and disruptive to a Don Juan. If you see a girl whose phone number you want, get it within 3 seconds of realising you want her digits.

6. Don't be a Nice Guy whose only aim is to please others. Please yourself!

7. Learn to accept failure/rejection. It happens to every guy in the world. No exceptions. Realise that a failure will help you learn a lot more than a success will anyway!

8. Let go! If you can lose yourself in the moment and trust your instincts without hesitation, you will be set.

9. Have/Be Fun! What's the point of any of this if you're not having fun? Not only is fun the most attractive quality a guy can have, but by constantly having fun you will LOVE your life.

And remember fellas: always look out for #1. Put YOUR LIFE first. Never let anyone disrespect you, or mess with your life. You will know if a relationship isn't working, if it CREATES stress, instead of taking stress away.

---------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------
Quotes (and Translations):

"As you think you shall become" - Pook
Translation: Think of yourself as the Great Catch and you will become it.

"ALWAYS be willing to walk away." – Pook
Translation: Never give an inch.

"If you don't do anything, and sit on your ass like a nice guy, you are already down for the count. You rejected YOURSELF." - Pulse
Translation: Always go for the close.


"Shy people THINK too much. Shy people react to situations when they should be acting/initiating" – Pook
Translation: Stop thinking. Start doing.

"Want to talk to that gorgeous girl who is so hot? Do it now. If things don't end up the way you want to then at least you can sleep easily and you can focus on new and different projects." - Stockholder
Translation: The only way you will know if she is interested, is if you let her know that you're interested.

"Everything of success is in how you think. Control your mind and you control your destiny." – Pook

"When you let the idea of a woman rejecting you stop you from walking over
and talking to her, you're GIVING AWAY YOUR POWER."
Translation: The powerful man is not afraid of rejection.

"The Nice Guy becomes an emotional tampon to be used and discarded." – Pook
Translation: Chicks will use you to vent their emotions and then run off with some jerk (if you're a Nice Guy)

"Not approaching a girl actually feels worse than getting rejected" - Don Joey

"You can't be happy in a relationship unless you're happy being single" - Pook
Translation: Have ambition. Make yourself a great life instead of waiting for a chick to make it great.

"Don’t just write it out, go DO the things you wrote" - DJ Bedford
Translation: All of this is pointless unless you put it into effect.

"Never look down after making eye contact; this is a sign of submission." – CoolHandLuke

"Don't ever say "Idon't know, what do you want to do". This is murder!!" – CoolHandLuke
Translation: Take control from day 1.

"In the end, it all comes down to a state of mind. You have to know, not think, KNOW that you don't need a woman to be happy. " - CoolHandLuke,

"Now we all know that ****y+funny = wet panties." – Indy
Translation: Be openly confident and humorous.

"You've got to be prepared to act as soon as you recognize opportunities to meet single women. Don't put it off. Approach all those hot & sexy honeys as
soon as the opportunity presents itself. " - Terminator911

"Never ask a women to become exclusive. She must ask YOU. She must talk about it FIRST. " - Anti-Dump,
Translation: Asking to become exclusive is a sign of neediness.

"Hesitation is like masturbation: in the end your only screwing yourself" - Young Juan
Translation: ALWAYS TAKE ACTION!

"When I got their name, I'd use it constantly, women think their name is the most important word in the world." – bondjamesbond

" Why be afraid of someone 5'6", 125 lbs.? If somebody that little scares you, you'd better grow some balls, quick time." – bondjamesbond
Translation: Women are not to be feared, but to be loved.

"Nobody has to be shy. You choose to be shy. Don't let fear stop you anymore! " - Dr. Feelgood

"*DJs know not all girls are worth dating*" – Wildthang
Translation: Be selective

"Most women don't go for guys who 'love' them. They go for guys who excite them, frighten them, give them an adrenaline rush and can keep their little puzzies moist by acting like real men. " - WildThang,
Translation: Don't be the "I love you, so please love me" schmoe, be the "I'm gonna get your heart pumping so strap yourself in" man.

"Convince the girl that she is more interested in you than you are in her." - Terminator911

"Trust me on this one, a confident elephant man swimming in a pool of dung is more attractive than an insecure Tom Cruise. We all know this : an assertive fat a$$ will always be more successful than a cute, muscular queer boy. " - Challenge Guy
Translation: Confidence is key.

"Single women go on dates to have a good time, not to be serious.
Keep this in mind and never act serious on the first few dates." - Terminator911
Translation: Focus on fun.

"End the date before she does. When you first start dating, it is important to avoid that awkward time when it is getting late and she finally has to announce that it is time for her to go home." - Terminator911
Translation: Convince her that she is more interested in you, than you are in her.

“Nice guys think their sexuality will scare the woman so they hide it. They then wonder why they hear "Let's Just be Friends" a lot." – Pook
Translation: Use kino! Talk sexy!

"As a true DJ you have to be willing to cut a girl loose in a second if she crosses the line. And let her know." – PimpNHard
Translation: Be a powerfule male.

"There was a time during my twenties when I approached over ONE HUNDRED women a month! I didn't spend my spare time doing nothing....I wouldn't go to one store a day, I'd go to thirty! I loved it! Every second of it! Hell, even getting blown off was fun....I'd get with my buddies later and swap "war stories" with 'em. We'd laugh our asses off!" – Bondjamesbond
Translation: Rejection can be A LOT of fun


"Powerful Male: Strike the concept beautiful out. It adds nothing and it doesn't help. She is not a princess, someone special super human. She is simply a woman that a lot of men emotionally respond to." – Darkdream

"When you look directly and potently into a woman's eyes, her body produces chemicals like phenylethylamine, or PEA, that jolts the sensation of being in love." – Surfboard
Translation: Use eye contact.

"Unless you're blind, you use your eyes to communicate with women more than your mouth." – Bondjamesbond
Translation: Use eye contact.

"Direct eye contact with a woman, combined with a nice smile tells a woman "I like what I'm seeing, I am interested in you"....." Bondjamesbond
Translation: Use eye contact.

"Warmth is the reason why Danny De Vito gets laid. Lack of warmth is probably the reason why you don’t." - Challenge Guy
Translation: To succeed wit women, you must be a warm guy.

"never, ever, ever, ever, ever analyze her problem's. when she start's *****ing or complaining about something, don’t tell her how to solve it. just listen & sympathize with her. agree with her." - A turtle named adrian,
Translation: Do you want to be her lover or her therapist?

"rephrase whatever she say's & feed it back to her. "so you think i should cut my hair", "so, you believe he did it", whatever." - Turtle named Adrian

"Never call the very next day after getting a number no matter how good looking they are or how well the approach/conversation went." – Pimpologist
Translation: Calling back soon is a sign of neediness.

"After getting a number, never say… “I’ll give you a call” – Pimpologist

"Always assume the sale" - Master of the universe
Translation: Assume that she will say yes (intead of saying "I was wondering if um...well maybe you'd like to come out with me sometime?" Say "I really wanna see (insert movie title). Come see it with me."

"If I could only remember that the days were, not bricks to be laid row on row, to be built into a solid house, where one might dwell in safety and peace, but only food for the fires of the heart." ~Edmund Wilson
Translation: Stop trying to build yourself into a warm cocoon. Start living and taking risks!

"Women like silent men. They think they're listening." ~Marcel Achard
Translation: Shut up. Let HER talk.

"There is much to be said for failure. It is more interesting than success." ~Max Beerbohm

"If you have tried to do something and failed, you are vastly better off than if you had tried to do nothing and succeeded." ~Lloyd Jones

"Success and failure. We think of them as opposites, but they're really not. They're companions - the hero and the sidekick." ~Laurence Shames

"Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them." ~Brendan Francis
Translation: Never let petty fears stop you.


[This message has been edited by De La Soul (edited 10-28-2002).]
 

tonight

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very good post
 

Take No Dirt

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De La Soul, the enormous time and effort you took in compiling this wealth of essential DJ information for the Newbies will not only accelerate the Newbies' growth, but will be a valuable reference guide for DJ principles and techniques.

As a more seasoned DJ, I salute you and say "Merci, thank you, gracias" to you!

[This message has been edited by Take No Dirt (edited 05-10-2002).]
 

318 Most Hated

Don Juan
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That's excellent post right there.....

Holla....

------------------
"When you sit down at a poker table, look around and identify the chump. If you don't see one, leave, because the chump is you!" -Kodak

"I keep my Desert Eagle ****ed back in my tuxedo, with my top hat
What you broke motherf*&kaz know about that?"
-Big Pun(r.i.p.)
 

Pulsar

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Kick Ass post!!!!

It helped a lot...especially the part about living today like it is your last day!
 

oakraiderz2

Master Don Juan
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I needed 2 hear this...good boost!!!


------------------
Talk is cheap.

Imitation is the death of ones self.

Boys do what they can... men do what they want.

aim- oakraiderz2
eclipse23gst
email-cwoodson6@hotmail.com
 

THIAGO BRAZIL

Master Don Juan
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very good
instead I say
THE FUTURE IS IN YOUR HEAD -MIND
 

Ricky

Master Don Juan
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Please put this in tips this is really great advice.

I needed this today after the breakup with my girlfriend.

I have been trying to tell her time and time again that the only one responsible for your happiness is yourself!

The day could be beautiful outside, you could have no reason to complain but then some minor traffic jam could put you in a bad mood, ONLY IF YOU ALLOW IT! YOU COULD INSTEAD LOOK AT WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY IT IS AND BE HAPPY.

The point is, is that some people constantly look for outside events to make them Happy. If you always let your mood be subject to the conditions around you, you will undoubtedly be unhappy alot.

ENJOY LIFE, LOOK AT THE POSITIVES AND BE CONFIDENT. YOU WILL MAKE MANY FRIENDS INCLUDING ROMANTIC ONES THIS WAY BECAUSE PEOPLE WILL WANT TO BE AROUND YOU!

Good luck my brothers!
 

NormalGuy

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Damn good post

Everytime I feel weak and pansy ass in my life or with my emerging relationships with women, I just come here and read some of the inspirational posts, and it gives me more courage to go out there and shake things up
 

dead_romeo

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BUMP


Informative and very useful post, to say the least, nice one De La Soul.

I need to read this like 50 times


------------------
"Conclusions arrived at through reasoning have very little or no influence in altering the course of our lives. Hence, the countless examples of people who have the clearest convictions and yet act diametrically against them time and time again; and have as the only explanation for their behavior the idea that to err is human." Carlos Castaneda - The Fire From Within

"It is the responsibility of the strong to help the weak become strong" - Harlan Ellison
 
W

wheelin&dealin

Guest
I want to make sweet, sweet love to de la soul for posting this. (but not in a gay way)
 

De La Soul

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Originally posted by wheelin&dealin:
I want to make sweet, sweet love to de la soul for posting this. (but not in a gay way)
I don't know whether to be flattered or worried.....
 

De La Soul

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Originally posted by dead_romeo:
BUMP


Informative and very useful post, to say the least, nice one De La Soul.

I need to read this like 50 times


Thanks for the compliment!

Yeah newbies seriously take the time to look at this.

Damn I hate bumping my own stuff. But when it's on page 3 Don Juan Discussion, a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.....
 

THIAGO BRAZIL

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Read this 5 times a day for 2 months and you will become invencible.
 

david_med@hotmail.com

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superb post. great read and i loved it!

"live like you will die today"....i can't find anything more inspirational than that quote.

and the part about not to think and just do....definately a key factor in the game. i used to tell my friend to be "ignorant." ignorance is bliss. cuz when u start thinking about shyt, thats when ur already ****ed.

one
 

CyranoDeBergerac

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Does this go in the DJ bible or is THIS the DJ bible?

Masterful work. De La Soul once again proves why he is one of the best. I cannot thank you enough. This is going to be the first entry in my bible, and should be a MUST READ.

-CyranoDeBergerac

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"If we are to change the world we must start with that one corner of it over which we excercise full influence...ourselves."

Of mice and men...which are you?
 
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