"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Ever feel like your lifestyle is not conducive?

Flabbergasped?

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 14, 2005
Messages
539
Reaction score
12
For all intensive purposes, I am the epitome of what we lousy Americans call nerds, but this impression is only made because of my lifestyle. Consider:

-I play the piano, so I have to listen to a lot of Classical music, as well as play it. Once that happened, I stopped listening to 50 Cent, and a few pricks try to use that as a cheap shot.

-I am the President of our chess club. Now, back in 6th grade, my PE teacher got me involved in some Chess things, and now I've won three district-wide tournaments in a row. If you can imagine how many times I've been rapped on for that...

-My parents force me to have good grades. My dad literally thinks it is more important to finish homework that to eat, and as a result of my parent's strenous focus on academics, I have pretty high grades (honor roll for about since 6th grade or so), and am in the National Honor Society. Nerd point number 3.

The problem is, when I try to approach at school, the targets half of the time have their mind set that I am a nerd/workaholic, and as a result end up shrugging me off for all the reasons associated with something like this. The saddest part is that, in the past extravagances I've had with girls from my school, they end up feeling inferior and leaving as a result. To quote, when we got in a fight, "You think you're better than me because of your trouphies and your debater knowledge, blah, blah."

A sad state of affairs. You strive for excellence and get shot down because of it.

Thoughts?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Jake-inator

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2005
Messages
352
Reaction score
2
"You think you're better than me because of your trouphies and your debater knowledge, blah, blah."
A couple of my friends had really good grades in highschool, but i couldn't call them nerds really.
Right after they were done with school, they forgot about it. They did their own thing.
I think what makes you a nerd is in the way that you interact with people.
For example, like trying to prove that you're smarter than them in conversations.
Try to be more humble.

You're tying school into too much of your life. Just relax and stop using words like conducive... what the hell does that mean by the way?

Also, when you try to succed academically, your social life is going to suffer as a result.
You have to organize yourself so that you can fit in a little of both.

My parents tried to do the same thing to me... organize my life but i rebelled.
I never liked people telling me who i should be.
Control Freaks... always trying to live their life through you. :rolleyes:
 

VIVAlasVEGASBaby

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2003
Messages
360
Reaction score
3
Location
Durham, NC
I'm #1 in my class of 235 and that doesn't stop me from getting girls. Would you say you look like a "geek"?
 

NRM

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 6, 2004
Messages
563
Reaction score
0
Well, honestly, are you TOO time consumed and constrained? If you're tied down pretty majorly, I'm not sure what you can do about it except change and groove into a better more enjoyable lifestyle for yourself

As of right now, it sounds that you spend almost your whole waking day on this stuff. And if you do, what CAN people think?

If you like chess, do it. If you like piano, play it. If you like appealing to your parents, then do what they tell you.

But if you want something else, you'll have to break some rules.
 

DogFashionDisco

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 23, 2005
Messages
296
Reaction score
0
You are what you think you are. You are a nerd because you think you're a nerd. Believe me, I've seen way worse than you, dude.

So you think the piano is a crappy little nerd instrument that is only played by kids who have parents who make them play it( or whatever )? The piano is a very good thing to know how to play. It's basic, and it's simple yet powerful :)confused: :rolleyes: ). Haven't you heard of bands like Keane or Coldplay? They have the piano as the main or one of the main instruments, yet they sound awesome. There's always a way to change something that seems nerdy or stupid, into something cool or fun.

About the chess thing, who cares what other people think. Everyone has a talent, whether it popular and cool, or not. And if it's that bad, just quit. Start another hobby or talent. Do whatever the hell you wanna do, **** all the other kids who put you down because of it.

Your parents just want you to have a good future. Respect them. And for God's sake, the honor roll is not nerdy, but an accomplishment. One of the hottest chicks in my school is in the honor roll.

You need to stop caring so much of what other people think. And if someone makes fun of you for it, think of a comeback or insult.(for example with the piano: If someone says something like "haha, you play the piano, what a loser..." Respond with something like: "Well at least I can play an instrument" or "Well at least I have something to do instead of getting stoned all day" or something as simple as: "**** you".) Or just ignore them. Whatever. Do what you want to do, and don't stop doing something just because it's not really 'cool'.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Interpol

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 13, 2004
Messages
992
Reaction score
0
Location
STL
Originally posted by Jake-inator

You're tying school into too much of your life. Just relax and stop using words like conducive... what the hell does that mean by the way?
If you're 20 and you don't know what conducive means, then I'd say you're the one with the problem, not him.
 

Lost In the Seas

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 9, 2004
Messages
236
Reaction score
0
Age
37
Location
Hong Kong
Keep up the good work, even as you can't get laid in the near future, you will get money nice car and big house to attract women, not girls. Don't give up hope, seriously whether or not you can hook up girls or get laid in high school or college isn't that important, to me, it's using all these techniques to get the girl of your dreams.
 

RaMar

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2002
Messages
214
Reaction score
0
Age
38
Location
California
the most popular kids at my school actually have really good grades, they are in classes like AP Calculus, etc. Though this has something to do with the fact that I live in an upper class society.

My advice is just be laid back. The thing about being a nerd is not that you have good grades but you act the part as well. Don't where clothes that would classify you as a nerd. For instance, where t-shirts with skate companies on them or something, hell try skateboarding while your at it, try any sport. Except maybe tennis and golf and vollyball lol. Anyways where baggier pants or at least more fashionable ones like AE or go the other way completely and where pants from hot topic.

As for that 50 cent nonsense just tell them that 50 cent sucks. Tell them you've listen to his new cd and its nothing but garbage. If you really want to impress them listen to some real rap like Tech N9ne. Get a system in your car and bump it.

Another important thing that many nerds do wrong is don't act like your trying to get a girlfriend. Girls can tell if your "looking" and that takes away from the challenge for them.

You have a problem with the classical music. My advice is to keep it as a guilty pleasure and listen to rap or rock as much as you can.
 

RaMar

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2002
Messages
214
Reaction score
0
Age
38
Location
California
Originally posted by DogFashionDisco
Haven't you heard of bands like Keane or Coldplay? They have the piano as the main or one of the main instruments, yet they sound awesome. There's always a way to change something that seems nerdy or stupid, into something cool or fun.
exactly. Get the piano tabs to some popular songs from keane and coldplay, learn them, and play them for your friends. I have one friend who taught himself how to play Usher's Burn on his sax and the girl went crazy when he played it at a school rally. Learn a popular yet difficult song and play it at a talent show or something.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Porky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 16, 2003
Messages
1,474
Reaction score
0
Either join a sports team or start working out like it's your religion.
 
Top