"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Ever been attracted to someone, but know they aren't good for you?

T

ThisNThat

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There had been times where I there had been some mutual attraction between me and a woman, but...there was something about them that I know...there would be a toxic situation so I wouldn't ask them out.

One was a serious drinker, Vodka at some of the parties. She really flirted with me and get close with me on the dance floor. Cute, but tends to get wasted..and smelling that on her turned me off. She used to complain about how she would sleep with guys, but would never call her back...like she wanted a relationship with a nice guy, but she'd always hop into bed with these dudes.

Luckily, she had one guy actually stick with her...and they've been together ever since.

Had another situation where a woman had issues big time. Someone even warned me about her...so I didn't ask her out, but hung out with her in a group..she revealed a lot of things about herself, and a b/f that was part of a criminal element of sorts. So I dodged a bullet there.

There just comes a time that you think with the big head , instead of the little...but it had been VERY tempting.

Anyone in the same boat? Same experiences?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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J

johnhat57

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Been in the same boat man. Good on you to actually dodge those bullets. I can think of two times off the top of my head when I saw red flags (drinker / dramatic / something else just off) and still got involved. In both cases, the girl was beautiful and amazing in bed. It was one of those trade-offs. The short term pleasure v. the long term headache. I don't really regret either, but I don't need additional experiences like this.
 
soulforge

soulforge

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Yes man... my ex, pretty much the whole of the relationship, I had a gut instinct and feeling she was not good for me..

But i carried on because she was attractive... dumb move
 
Serenity

Serenity

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Yes, for less than a week. I was pretty inexperienced and had gone without sex for over 5 years. Something felt off about her, despite not knowing from my lack of experience my gut warned me and I listened. Went complete ghost and later found out my friend's girlfriend knew who she was, she told me the girl I dated was definitely bad news.

I was initially attracted, but pretty quickly her looks couldn't make up for what her personality lacked. I lost attraction, I can't remain attracted to someone who's bad for me. I love myself too much for that.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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mrgoodstuff

mrgoodstuff

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Grewd said:
Yes, for less than a week. I was pretty inexperienced and had gone without sex for over 5 years. Something felt off about her, despite not knowing from my lack of experience my gut warned me and I listened. Went complete ghost and later found out my friend's girlfriend knew who she was, she told me the girl I dated was definitely bad news.

I was initially attracted, but pretty quickly her looks couldn't make up for what her personality lacked. I lost attraction, I can't remain attracted to someone who's bad for me. I love myself too much for that.
Click to expand...
You loved yourself too much to fall for her bull
 
Von

Von

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Twice following my 1st LTR breakup.

First girl was flirting with me hard... and I knew, I could have made it happens (we were both on rebound)...everyone was asking me ''how did you end up with such beauty etc''.. she did all the IOI sign, invited me etc etc... but I resisted... nothing ever happened and I made my distance. Why? I felt that I would fall back in my LTR that just ended... her and my ex... had similar personality and didnt like each other (going from same dress, to my ex never wanting to go where she was) etc.. 2 years later she getting married to a good guy.... but I can see its always ''all about her''

2nd girl, wrote a post about her here recently... she was stunning, again... I got the ''how you dating such a beauty''...however, the longer and more I was seeing her... the more I could make a parralel with my Ex.... so at the end it didnt work but I was happy cause she probably be a headache

Now the girl I am seeing... it feels good and simple.

Not a dating expert but your instinct should be followed more often :)
There is such things as ... brain or connections before beauty
 
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