Ever Been accused of Sexual Harassment?

[Solomon]

I just started this new job and today I got called into the office for that shyt and get this

• They won't tell me what allegedly happened
• They won't tell me who I "harassed"
• They won't do an investigation
• I didn't get written up just a "verbal warning"

Now I'm baffled? How am I being accused of harassing someone sexually but they won't even let me defend myself against the allegations or the person(s)?

Their saying it's company policy to protect the person blah bla blah

I honestly don't know who did this as I keep to myself and I'm baffled, and now I'm very paranoid, I've been running back dialogue with anyone and everyone the last two weeks in my head

 

[sodbuster]

had a war pig of an assistant who used to hump my leg like a dog in the office. When she quit,she told people I made her quit because she wouldn't sleep with me. SOMETIMES their imagination runs wild,sometimes its a revenge thing because YOU won't sleep with them.

 

[backbreaker]

By law they have to treat the case of sexual harassment pretty seriously. I am willing to bet this is the deal; they know she's full of it, but they can't not say anything at all to you about it becuase then they could be in deep doo doo even if you didn't do antyhing, so they called you to the office and gave you some bS verbal warning.

I assure you my friend had they had evidence, you'd be gone. They won't do an investigation because they know she is full of it, and want it all to go away.


"to answer your question yes I have. I told this here a few times, girl I was not even really friends with, a girl who just took it upon her self to follow me around lol. She asked me did I go to the gym and I said yes, and she asked could she come. She was anorexic and would relapse (met her in AA) becuase of image issues, i couldn't say no, i figured i was helping out. I mean she wasn't ugly (at all actually) but, i never hit on her, never touched her, nothing. then, she would follow me to subway afterwords. Then we'd go swimming together. I mean she was cool i had nothing against her, besides the fact that I was in a relationship, she had 1. just tried to kill herself like 6 months earlier (Strike 1) 2. had a 8 year old (strike 2) and 3. was "separated" from her husband (strike 3!!)

Anyway, one days she texts me and asks me did I want to go bowling. This was the first time, we had not going ot the gym and she was just asking me to do something with her for the hell of it. We had went to get food and stuff but I mean, after we worked out. I said not really thanks for the offer though. She texts back and says well, if you ever want to hang out just let me know. I say okay but I think I like our relationship where it is. So the next day, actually yes it was the next day, everyone in the meeting is looking at me funny. NO one will talk to me. I'm like well scre you guys too lol. So I knock on my door the day after that, police. she filed a report saying I harassed her. The fact that I am black and she was white, and cute l didnt' help either. They wanted me to come down for questioning the next day. I went, brought an attorney with me and it was squashed within about 30 minutes, didn't have a shred of evidence, she even couldn't get her story straight. She had said I did something with her on this and this day and my GF was able to confirm that I was actually with her at that time lol. That did it. Anyway, nevertheless, even thoughts he had just tried to commit suicide, there were alot of people in AA that were looking for a reason not to like me and found one and just stuck with it. Mind you i had like 4 years clean at this time but none of that mattered. they took her side, and I left AA, it was just that time for me to move on with my life.

With all that said I hope she gets better. I was pretty traumatized by the whole thing at the time, but I've moved on and I'm better for it, and have no hard feelings, though I want nothing to do with her. I know she relapsed. She has a kid , no one deserves that crap what she puts her through.

 

[Warrior74]

yup. Technically I was her supervisor, but she worked mornings and I worked evening. We communicated by notes emails and phone calls. She wanted my job. Our boss thought I was angling for his job. They smoke weed together everyday. Do the math. Needless to say they never found anything. They questioned every female I worked with, even from other departments. Some which I had never even spoken to. My supervisor told two of my female employees that if they wanted my job now would be a good time to get rid of me.

The wouldn't tell me who it was. They told me if I went and asked female employees if they knew who it was, that would be considered further harassment and I would be fired. I had to walk into work everyday with half of the people there looking at me like I was some sort of pervert. I had a woman anda newborn baby at home, it was stressful as hell. I started having panic attacks at the thought of being unemployed. I hated going to work.

The other females all knew me and thought well of me. They told the truth, they told me who it was. They thought she was being a selfish dumb bytch, she was mad that I got promoted over her and had mentioned to some of them how she was going to get me. They told that too. And guess what the end result was.... I received a verbal warning that if I was seen inappropriately touching any woman in the work place I would be fired immediately. No apology, no clearing of my name. No reprecussions to her for trying to get my job. Just upper management captain save a hos and ass coverers.

I stayed there for another year before I got let go, but that last year I just didnt give a ****. Also I told my manager who set this up, that if he ever pulled some **** like that again, I'd beat the living sh1t out of him.

 

[Falcon25]

This is why you don't try to date girls from work. Never stick your divk in the cash register. Remember, even if you just ask a girl out at work, she can claim sexual harrasment. Work is to provide you the ability to mate outside of it. Remember that.

 

[runner83]

This is why you don't try to date girls from work. Never stick your divk in the cash register. Remember, even if you just ask a girl out at work, she can claim sexual harrasment. Work is to provide you the ability to mate outside of it. Remember that.

Tough if it does happen to you. And complete BS if they won't give you details.

That's why I never do anything at work, unless THEY INITIATE and I know they are begging for it.

In the last couple of years, I've:

* Been with a married woman (no one else in the office ever knew about it, she came to her senses and broke it off some time later). Conveniently she was a temp and left soon after.

* Fvcked a girl from work (two consenting adults and she asked for my number, so no issues there). One nighter, and she also was a temp so left soon after.

* Fvcked a girl from work, first time was in the sick room in the basement, and then for several months after that (this was my last STR). She was also a temp and now gone.


Risk = Reward

Depends on how much you value your job.

I don't follow set rules like "don't date girls from work". If a girl is begging for it, I give it to them and if it ever did come down to a BS s*xual harassment claim, I would give them hell.

Or, simply line up a job elsewhere with another company and go from there.

 

[synergy1]

This is why you don't try to date girls from work. Never stick your divk in the cash register. Remember, even if you just ask a girl out at work, she can claim sexual harrasment. Work is to provide you the ability to mate outside of it. Remember that.

it goes further reaching than this as one can get busted for sexual harassment based on stuff posted on your facebook profile.

I saw a great talk about Lawyers and how the law functions today. As it is, everyone is basically watching over their backs because it doesn't take doing something wrong to actually get in trouble. The idea was that with everyone walking on egg shells, people function at a sub-optimal level due to fear/anxiety.

 

[backbreaker]

Tough if it does happen to you. And complete BS if they won't give you details.

That's why I never do anything at work, unless THEY INITIATE and I know they are begging for it.

In the last couple of years, I've:

* Been with a married woman (no one else in the office ever knew about it, she came to her senses and broke it off some time later). Conveniently she was a temp and left soon after.

* Fvcked a girl from work (two consenting adults and she asked for my number, so no issues there). One nighter, and she also was a temp so left soon after.

* Fvcked a girl from work, first time was in the sick room in the basement, and then for several months after that (this was my last STR). She was also a temp and now gone.


Risk = Reward

Depends on how much you value your job.

I don't follow set rules like "don't date girls from work". If a girl is begging for it, I give it to them and if it ever did come down to a BS s*xual harassment claim, I would give them hell.

Or, simply line up a job elsewhere with another company and go from there.

you really don't get it.

When I was 21 years old and I had my first company, I would often work extremely late. I didn't have a personal secreary, didn't need one, but there were a few females in the office. One in particular, I had no doubt wanted to jump on it. It got to the point she would openly flirt with me, I didnt' go out of my way to stop her. she was cute. Then she started volunteering to stay late to help me out with some stuff and just BS to keep around me. So one night I said you know what i'm horney, she wants it, let's do this. I make a move and 5 minutes later she is on her knees lol. Anyway this lated for about 2 months, then, this was about the time I started taking my first LTR seriously and I cut this girl off. Girl made my life a living hell. I couldn't fire her lol, but i couldn't' work with her. without going into details, let's just say it would have been much better had i kept my **** in my pants. And i didn't need to I had plates which was the worse part about it. Lesson learned.

FF now, I have an assistant, that while older, about 41, is extremely ****able and makes it known she would not mind being ****ed. the few times I do vent to her about what's going on at home, she goes out of her way to say well I were your GF I wouldnt' do that to you, etc al, just overly flirtatious. Not having it today, not worth it at all.


I never want to have so much work that I don't have time to get laid outside of work. That was a lesson I had to learn the hard way.

 

[5string]

had a war pig of an assistant who used to hump my leg like a dog in the office. When she quit,she told people I made her quit because she wouldn't sleep with me. SOMETIMES their imagination runs wild,sometimes its a revenge thing because YOU won't sleep with them.

WTF? War pig humps your leg? Must have forgot about the dog treats in your pocket.

 

[Warrior74]

Tough if it does happen to you. And complete BS if they won't give you details.

That's why I never do anything at work, unless THEY INITIATE and I know they are begging for it.

In the last couple of years, I've:

* Been with a married woman (no one else in the office ever knew about it, she came to her senses and broke it off some time later). Conveniently she was a temp and left soon after.

* Fvcked a girl from work (two consenting adults and she asked for my number, so no issues there). One nighter, and she also was a temp so left soon after.

* Fvcked a girl from work, first time was in the sick room in the basement, and then for several months after that (this was my last STR). She was also a temp and now gone.


Risk = Reward

Depends on how much you value your job.

I don't follow set rules like "don't date girls from work". If a girl is begging for it, I give it to them and if it ever did come down to a BS s*xual harassment claim, I would give them hell.

Or, simply line up a job elsewhere with another company and go from there.

I wish for all the **** I went thru that I had actually done something. It's nothing worse than being falsely accused for something you didn't even do. Then again this chic was a six foot tall lazy fat ass who would have required a full bottle of jack daniels and handful of pills to approach.

After some scaring **** like that, dating women at work just doesn't seem worth it. I've dated a few company interns after their internship was over, but I was very careful and very quiet about it even then.

 

[Falcon25]

Men who fuvk women at their work, are men who don't have the capability to find women outside of it. ANY FOOL can lay a woman in his circle of profession. ANY. ANY ugly boss, supervisor, shift manager, etc can use his power or friendship in the workplace to fuvk a woman. Even a co-worker. It's not that hard. It's not that difficult to seduce a woman who is comfortable around you. It's when you can pull something you just met, in the middle of the night, middle of the day, that makes it truly worthwile.
I can walk into a club KNOWING that I can pull a girl out ANYTIME I want in less than 45 minutes of meeting her. A complete stranger. OR, I can charm a woman I just met during the day, get her number and take her out. A complete stranger. That is where you want to be. That is when you don't worry about these things.
WORK IS TO PROVIDE YOU THE ABILITY TO MATE WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX OUTSIDE OF IT. UNLESS YOU WORK AT PIZZA HUT, OR DON'T VALUE YOUR NAME IN A LAW SUIT.

 

[Warrior74]

Men who fuvk women at their work, are men who don't have the capability to find women outside of it. ANY FOOL can lay a woman in his circle of profession. ANY. ANY ugly boss, supervisor, shift manager, etc can use his power or friendship in the workplace to fuvk a woman. Even a co-worker. It's not that hard. It's not that difficult to seduce a woman who is comfortable around you. It's when you can pull something you just met, in the middle of the night, middle of the day, that makes it truly worthwile.
I can walk into a club KNOWING that I can pull a girl out ANYTIME I want in less than 45 minutes of meeting her. A complete stranger. OR, I can charm a woman I just met during the day, get her number and take her out. A complete stranger. That is where you want to be. That is when you don't worry about these things.
WORK IS TO PROVIDE YOU THE ABILITY TO MATE WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX OUTSIDE OF IT. UNLESS YOU WORK AT PIZZA HUT, OR DON'T VALUE YOUR NAME IN A LAW SUIT.

I agree. But that's really not what this thread is about.

 

[Falcon25]

Actually, it's everything that this thread is about. Read what I just wrote carefully to that of OP's situation. And anyone else who may be thinking of workplace sex or dating.

 

[backbreaker]

warrior I think falcon is more responding to runners post than the OP's in which I agree with both of you. it doesn't have to do with the oP's but everything to do with runners.

 

[squirrels]

I just started this new job and today I got called into the office for that shyt and get this

• They won't tell me what allegedly happened
• They won't tell me who I "harassed"
• They won't do an investigation
• I didn't get written up just a "verbal warning"

Now I'm baffled? How am I being accused of harassing someone sexually but they won't even let me defend myself against the allegations or the person(s)?

Their saying it's company policy to protect the person blah bla blah

I honestly don't know who did this as I keep to myself and I'm baffled, and now I'm very paranoid, I've been running back dialogue with anyone and everyone the last two weeks in my head

Do you hit on girls at work? Might be a good idea to stop for a while...just treat them like dudes. (minus the boobie-jokes, of course)

I hope it works out for you, man. Where I work, EVERYONE has had some kind of repartee at the VERY least with someone of the opposite sex.

 

[JT7890]

I would say it's very unprofessional to flirt or date ANYBODY you work with, then again I don't work at Pizza Hut or flip burgers.

When you are working in your chosen career, at work you should be more focused on the job you have to do and maintaining a positive working relationship with your colleagues RATHER THEN trying to get a hard off. If you are flipping burgers and could care less, then I guess go for it. If you are working in your career field, this is NOT something you want on your background check.

The little side restaurant jobs I had during my very early years in college I could care less about the job. So yes, I flirted with everybody and didn't take the position seriously. But doing that in my chosen career field? Hell no. Your personal relationship issues began to carry over into the workplace and it WILL affect your performance.

 

[Warrior74]

warrior I think falcon is more responding to runners post than the OP's in which I agree with both of you. it doesn't have to do with the oP's but everything to do with runners.

Yah. Gotcha. At my current job. My boss and the another manager are husband and wife. They met at work. The general manager and one of the producers are husband and wife. They met at work. The editor and the camera (person/girl) are engaged. They met at work. It's not frowned on at my current job. Hell at every job I worked at there were inter-office romances. The problem is when it's UNWANTED attention. That's usually when the harassment knives come out, or when someone has an ANGLE and is using it to further another agenda. So while I personally take a hard stance against dating in the work place for most AFCs, I understand that for normal folks, it's normal to do so. As for DJs. If you are gonna love em and leave em. Do it away from the workplace. The last thing you need is jilted broken hearted women, or vindictive women, or clingy needy women (or BDP women) causing you problems on your job. But for the normal sheep, its not that bad in most places if you have normal social calibration.

 

[Falcon25]

You are right, some people do meet and live happily after in the work place. But, those relationships become strained. It's hard to see someone at home and in the work place, usually, one has to leave the job or transfer elsewhere. The problem is that you just don't know. It takes a long, long, long time to see if a girl GENUINELY likes you at work. Even then, I would be careful (Unless you work at burger king or something). In this economy, this is CAREER SUICIDE.

Use work to get to other girls, sometimes girls at work have single friends, even then it sucks cause you could get "the player" card but it won't directly affect your law suit or firing. STAY AWAY FROM GIRLS AT YOUR CAREER.

It's just a matter of time before Runner is fired or in a law suit. He is only 27, he has a long way to go before he gets cut down. In this economy, you cannot afford to have a sexual harrasment mark on your resume. Not that easy to get another career here in the States when you have sexual harrasment on your record.

 

[squirrels]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-GlAYJ2CQ4

 

[Solomon]

Do you hit on girls at work? Might be a good idea to stop for a while...just treat them like dudes. (minus the boobie-jokes, of course)

I hope it works out for you, man. Where I work, EVERYONE has had some kind of repartee at the VERY least with someone of the opposite sex.

Nope I don't "hit on" chicks at work, come on Squirrels you know me better then that man

I work at a place were there lot of women, I mean you name it they are there, beautiful ones, mostly cute, a lot of average and wilder beast as well. Nobody says it openly but it's a "meat market" personally I don't go to the work to "hit on" chicks much less flirt. But flirting has happened.

I do admit some of the conversation in the break room isn't appropriate but I'm not the initiator and it's usually when were of lunch. I know better then to hit on chicks at work because at the end of the day no puzzy is worth losing my job.

I pay my bills and unless some broad is gonna come out of pocket for me and provide for my lifestyle they way I want that's the way it's gonna be