Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Esmerelda

Phyzzle

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Helena works at the post office. Whenever I go in to buy stamps, we have this mischievous eye contact game going on. Today was a little different; She kept glancing over my shoulder and giggling.

I turned to look, and standing in line were several female customers, perhaps six in total. They all snapped their eyes down in shyness, having just been caught staring at me in awe. One woman had something special about her, a sort of mixture of vulnerability and virtue which I found incredibly attractive.

I left my package at the counter, and walked directly back to this quivering leaf. I learned that her name was Esmerelda, and told her that I was Phyzzato. Soon, her arms were draped around me in relief as she poured out her stresses, fears, and desires through a series of passionate moans and whispers into my ear.

When we ended our embrace, I saw a visible stare of pain and disappointment on the faces of the other women. I took pity upon them. “Group hug, everybody!!” Helena abandoned her counter, and we all abandoned our senses in a rapturous, giddy circle of delight.
 

KontrollerX

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Be careful or potato might slap a copyright lawsuit on your ass lmfao.
 

Mr.Positive

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Phyzzle said:
I left my package at the counter...
No offense (sarcasm of course)....but after reading this thread :D ...I think your package is still at the counter Phyzzle.

I would suggest recovering it ASAP.

Better yet, maybe you could pick up Potato's too and ship it to him ground. :up: :D
 

Victory Unlimited

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Yo Phyzzle,



Thanks to YOU, I now see the following, overly-used, catch-phrase in a whole DIFFERENT light:

:rockon: "Going POSTAL." :rockon:

Mail on.
 

DJDamage

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When I read the title, I was thinking you were going to refer to the novel "The Hunchback of Notre Dame". Its funny how that story is very close to reality. Esmerelda has a bunch of AFC's grovelling at her feet throughout the book and she becomes infatuated with a DJ, the captain of the King's Archers who happens to be engaged.
 

jafyk

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Whatever this never happened to you Phyzzle, lol. but it's a funny story.
 

Ol'BlueEyes

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At least there's a plus side to the tellers at the post office taking forever.
 

Phyzzle

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Why, every word of it is true of course. Women like me automatically, via eye contact. So many guys out there are wasting their time learning to develop "game" and "not giving her quite what she wants" and "challenging her" and "teasing her" and "having a sense of humor" and "doing unexpected things" and "being interesting."

None of that stuff will work, and nobody here understands attraction. No one but I can have an entire Victoria's Secret model after-party full of women mobbing me based solely on my looks. They'll do anything for me. I've even taken some of these women deer hunting. Of course, I don't need a gun, since I can simply look at the deer, and they cower back to my house and climb into my freezer because ... they know.

THEY KNOW.
 

Phyzzle

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Bump. The world from the eyes of the Phyttato. Life is good.
 

The Bat

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Phyttato, I got a question for you. Hopefully your experience and absolute authority on matters of seduction and attraction will be more than qualified enough to answer my question as the gospel truth. Because I know anyone else who tells me otherwise is a jealous fool who doesn't understand women.

If I'm not as good looking as Adonis, is there any hope left for me to attract beautiful women of all ages in all walks of life? I mean, I really want to spark both a sexual and emotional intimacy with this stripper that caught my eye recently. Her hair is magnificient like golden beam of light shining out of her round, voluptous head. And her body is a perfect hourglass figure yet so fragile that a whisper would shatter it into pieces. And her eyes, if gazed into long enough, are so easy to get lost into that I could stare at even the picture of them days on end. Her lips are so sensual and soft that she could kiss a sore herpes spot and make it disappear. Truly an enchanting and mysterious lady!

I think she just dances as a stripper to leave some hope in this mortal world that beautiful a creature like her are not completely out of reach. That mere mortals like me can long for the day she comes home to me after a night of heavy dancing, smoking, stripping, and drinking. That she just jumps up in my muscly arms and forgets about all her troubles and makes my pain, fear, and issues go away like the wind blows away a stray leaf on a stormy night. That I may write her seductive poetries so when she has time in between her routines, she can peek at them and they will let her know how my mind longs for her mind and how my heart longs for her heart.

Ah, that beautiful, gentle creature that is Azralea. My, look even her name makes my knees weak!

I'm just a mere mortal, Phyttato. I don't have the looks of Adonis or the build of Hercules or the courage of Julius Caesar, but how can I as a mere mortal with my loving heart and beautiful mind can make Azralea....oh gravity just grabbed me because my knees fell in love at the sight of that name...my gentle soul that cares for me and I for her in all ways imagined that will echo through time and space.

So what can you tell me? Speak now before my eyeballs decide to fall out in a pathetic attempt to seduce her since they've been staring at that name, let alone her sight, for too long.
 

Vulpine

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All Hail!!!

Bow in the presence of the Don Juan reincarnate and savior of all males...

PHYTTATO!

:moon: :moon: :moon: :moon: :moon: :moon:
 

Phyzzle

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The Bat said:
So what can you tell me? Speak now before my eyeballs decide to fall out in a pathetic attempt to seduce her since they've been staring at that name, let alone her sight, for too long.
Oh, but you mustn't attempt to seduce her, of course. You must wait for her to choose you. But you're already making playful eye contact, you say? That's most of it right there.

Of course, strippers make eye contact with everyone, but I can tell that when they look at me, it's different. It's special. It's so funny to kick back and watch all these other guys, who just don't get it, all goofing off and having conversations. I sometimes take videos of these guys with my camera phone, and show them to my teenage daughter and her friends so we can laugh at how pathetic they are.
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showpost.php?p=1326757&postcount=56&highlight=daughter

And boy, those girls are totally not impressed with those "****y funny" schmos.

Anyhow, you have the eye contact down. Now all that's left is the HUG. Like in this field report:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=144691&highlight=hug

Work on your hug. Really open up to your feelings, and let them flow.

If I'm not as good looking as Adonis, is there any hope left for me to attract beautiful women of all ages in all walks of life?
On second thought, you're pretty much screwed.
 

Interceptor

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SO it was YOU!!!!!!!!!!!


I knew it!!!!



I know Esmeralda too!
She is MINE!!!


You scandalous, unscrupulous rapscallion!!!


YOU!
You have absconded with MY Esmeralda!!!


Dog!
Now you will PAY!!!

:box:
 

Vulpine

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Bow and present your anus!

Our savior has spoken!

PHYTTATO!

:moon: :moon: :moon: :moon: :moon: :moon:
 

ketostix

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One woman had something special about her, a sort of mixture of vulnerability and virtue which I found incredibly attractive.

I left my package at the counter, and walked directly back to this quivering leaf. I learned that her name was Esmerelda, and told her that I was Phyzzato. Soon, her arms were draped around me in relief as she poured out her stresses, fears, and desires through a series of passionate moans and whispers into my ear.

When we ended our embrace, I saw a visible stare of pain and disappointment on the faces of the other women. I took pity upon them. “Group hug, everybody!!” Helena abandoned her counter, and we all abandoned our senses in a rapturous, giddy circle of delight.

After reading some of Phyzzato previous posts, I have come to the conclusion that he is incredibly observant, honest, and extremely perceptive in his ways with women! Phyzzato is mature and understands women. The rest of you are just mindless chumps to disagree :yes:!
 

Interceptor

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Stop flaming him!
He's trying to help us here!!!
Dont you see the man's maturity and experience level??
What, are you blind??
He's way beyond our meager little capablilties, seemingly able to draw massive amounts of women to his feet by merely displaying his 'soft blue eyes that make women melt'.

Long live Phyzzato!!!
 
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