Escalation Advice

[Road Warrior]

As I mentioned in earlier posts, I have been using online dating as part of my AFC recovery and to try to put together a game I can adapt into real time. Using the info I read and received on here, the responses have been getting much better (actually getting good responses!!). Of the last three I chatted with these have been my results:

1. Chats seemed to go well, got phone number, met, seemed to go well, then got a b1tchy message the next day. If she was a little hotter, I would have messaged back, but she was not, so NEXT!!

2. This one is my breakthrough!! We had actually chated a few times early this year, then she and her profile disappeared. About three weeks ago, I suddenly get a message from her, "I would like to meet for a drink if you are still interested" Well, I almost did not even reply, but since she is cute, where the old me would have replied, "I remember you, can I have your phone number and we can meet for a drink?", the new me replied " I thought you look familiar, your profile suddenly disappeared, I thought maybe you got kicked off the website for bad behavior!!!" It is PHUCKING AMAZING!! I never had the feeling of being able to steer how things are going until now!! We had exchanged a few e-mails, me always twisting things around to make a joke out of it, a little C&F and basically not giving a phuck what I write. Earlier this week, she replies back, ending with "I would like to know more about you" On my reply, this is where I am afraid I may have slipped back a little AFC. I replied with my usual, but then wrote, "Lets exchange phone numbers, I'd like to know more about you" I tried to work a little C&F into it, but I'm afraid it may have come off a little AFC. We'll see what happens, but this has been one major step toward the goal!!!

3. Contacted me about a week ago. I'm pretty sure I had seen her profile with pictures earlier and looked good, however, no pics on first contact. I usually do not reply to ones with no pics, but I'm going on a hunch here. She used to live not too far from me. We have exchanged a few times. I have not laid on the C&F as hard as i did on #2, but got a reply with "I would like to meet you for a drink."

I have not yet replied to #3 yet as I would like to get some advice on getting better results on escalating into smoothly getting the phone number/meet. I am not sure if I should take this as a cue, or as a test. Also, what are some of your opinions on giving your phone # first?? I am thinking that it is AFC to, but I would like to get some opinions.

 

[Zarky]

I think you may be overthinking all this. Just date a ton of broads, make a ton of mistakes, and take mental notes. If chicks are asking you out then you're doing at least a few things right.

If you bang one online chick for every 5 that you go out with, you're doing fine. What was the b|tchy message from #1?

 

[Road Warrior]

Thanks for the reply, I would still be lost if it was not for this site. Actually, I was just about to start typing a message to #1 to the effect of "It was cool to meet" when 1 new message pops up. She sends "I feel there is just no attraction on both of our parts, good luck in your search." Well, maybe I took it the wrong way, maybe I didn't. Anyway, if she was not on the borderline chunky side, I would have called her out on it.

 

[Zarky]

sounds like a preemptive rejection by her. Some women are extremely sensitive. I actually like those types because I find them incredibly easy to game (they're absolute suckers for push-pull), but most guys find them clingy and annoying. Of course if you're not attracted then it doesn't matter either way.