error in what i was trying to convey, how should i have said it?

[pete101]

this girl im seeing is clearly seeing other guys since we started dating, im kind of confused if i should condone this sort of behaviour given we only just started going out and that i know girls will see different guys at the beginning to see who they like best then decide. however they conceal this by claiming they're just 'meetings'.

this girl is clearly doing that and i called her out on it, but at the same time inadvertently said it was ok and i understood that she was single and free to do what she wants. i know she has a rule that once she kisses a guy she doesn't see other guys, hence maybe why she won't kiss me yet. (which is a fault on my part).

i was trying to convey being an understanding secure man unafraid of competition, however i think i just gave her carte blanche to do whatever she wants and i'd accept it. how should i have said it differently?

obviously it should have been in the context that if shes going to see other guys then i'll see other girls etc. but she'd likely tell me 'ok fine go do that and we'll be friends instead '

 

[Scars]

You shouldn't even had brought it up.

Solution: Spin more plates.

Then the whole situation would had never even bothered you. You're both single, there's no commitment yet. She is going to do what she wants, and you should too.

 

[46and2aheadofme]

You shouldn't even had brought it up.

Solution: Spin more plates.

Then the whole situation would had never even bothered you. You're both single, there's no commitment yet. She is going to do what she wants, and you should too.

This.

The fact that you brought it up inadvertently showed her that it bothers you, or at least that you were thinking about it.

You gotta let the little fish go so that you can catch the big one later. Or at least let the little fish roam until she becomes the big fish.

Point is: you will never have the right mind-set if you don't have multiple options.